Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
![[Deleted User]](https://core-api.thebump.com/core/v1/avatars/%5BDeleted%20User%5D)
[Deleted User]
member
Re: ~*~*MSPI Moms Weekly Check-In*~*~ 3/3
1. How are you doing? How is your LO doing? Well, DS is still intolerant of cabbage. Holy moly! I had maybe 1/4 cup of shredded cabbage Wed night and on Thursday he had the biggest grossest runniest poop ever. I haven't had any since his 1st bday party and he hasn't had a poop like that since then. So, with all that going on (he had a pretty gross poop Sat too) I did not get to try giving him soy.
2. What have you been surprised to learn has hidden dairy and/or soy in it? I was kicking myself when I realized the DiViSol I'd been giving him had Vit E, likely derived from soy. And my PNVs. I'd been "soy free" for a few weeks at that point, argh!
3. Any other burning questions you'd like answered or experiences to share? Nope.
I am doing good. The only thing i miss is my coffee creamer. I tried the So Delicious coconut creamer and it wasn't so delicious.
After 2 weeks of my dairy free diet I can happily say I have a new baby. We had a couple if episodes last week but overall she is doing so much better.
2. What have you been surprised to learn has hidden dairy and/or soy in it?
My "dairy free" coffee creamer had hidden dairy. That made me mad.
3. Any other burning questions you'd like answered or experiences to share?
Eating out sucks now. What restaurants have a good selection of dairy free choices?
1. How are you doing? How is your LO doing?
We were doing good until I decided to cycle through my freezer stash of milk more quickly last week and give DD 5 bottles of frozen milk during the week instead of her usual 2. I'm using milk that was frozen when I'd been dairy-free for 3 weeks, so I thought it'd be ok, but she has her trademark red cheek today and had mucousy diapers all weekend. She's done ok in previous weeks with just the 2 bottles, so I guess getting one each day was just too much.
2. What have you been surprised to learn has hidden dairy and/or soy in it?
Seasonings and spice mixes. I've started making my own taco seasoning, but I still need to find a dairy-free Ranch dressing mix and Italian dressing mix. I make a lot of crock-pot recipes that use these mixes and was really surprised (not so much about the Ranch, but tacos?). But I guess it is healthier this way....
3. Any other burning questions you'd like answered or experiences to share?
For everyone last week who was craving pizza, I made calzones this weekend that satisfied my craving better than anything else has! I was inspired by this recipe https://www.mspimama.com/2009/07/green-calzones.html but I went more traditional and used Italian spiced ground turkey, pepperoni, roasted red bell peppers, and onions. I also brushed the crust with olive oil, garlic, and Italian seasonings. I still missed the greasy cheese component of pizza, but at least it had the rest of the flavors!
Burning question: how do you know when your previously frozen milk is "clean"? I went by the standard of 2-3 weeks for milk protein to get out of my system, but apparently that wasn't long enough. I'm wondering if I just return to giving her 2 bottles/week and keep giving the milk from those dates, or if I need to jump ahead and use milk that was pumped even later.
It can take 3 to 5 weeks for the proteins to clear, perhaps longer if you've accidentally messed up here and there. Maybe stick to the later pumped milk.
I've had to toss pre-dairy/soy free milk and it sucks.
1. How are you doing? How is your LO doing? I'm doing well. I am learning to bake from scratch and relying less on convenience foods when cooking. My contribution to the spring food drive is growing as I clean out the pantry. LO is less gassy, has better BMs, and is sleeping better.
2. Hidden soy/dairy: Most of the bread at Whole Foods and all of the granola-type bars I had have soy and/or dairy.
3. I really like Daiya brand cheese. I usually use it on pizza. I actually prefer it to store brand mozzarella. (I followed a dairy free diet before pregnancy(. I dislike vegan gourmet, but have a friend who likes it and hates daiya.
1. How are you doing? How is your LO doing? We are doing really well. LO has had picture perfect stools for a while now which makes me super happy. Her face has cleared up so much. I have the follow up appt with our GI next week, and I am looking forward to having her stools tested again. I want to make sure we are in the clear.
2. What have you been surprised to learn has hidden dairy and/or soy in it? Like PP said all of the seasonings.
3. Any other burning questions you'd like answered or experiences to share? The GI told me that he thought I should try to add wheat back in when I felt up to it. He thinks my pedi asked me to eliminate wheat too soon, and since I saw the most progress after eliminating eggs he thinks I should try to add wheat back in to check. What would you do? I feel like we are in such a good place I am nervous to try. If she has a reaction I am wondering how many days it will last.
2. I still can't believe how much soy is in! Who knew?
3. I've been trying to find out- milk/soy in beer or wine?? And where can I find out???
This check in has been super helpful! Thanks so much for the suggestions and help!
We're alright, for the most part. The store we shop at changed their rotisserie chicken, and I didn't catch it until after I'd eaten it twice. So we had a couple of rough days, and a speck of blood in a diaper, but other than that we seem to be coming out of it alright.
2. What have you been surprised to learn has hidden dairy and/or soy in it?
Bread, for one. Why does bread need to have soy in it? Not that it matters now that I'm wheat-free, but it irritated me when I wasn't. Also, spaghetti sauce, chicken stock, and DH brought home a can of green beans that had whey in them.
3. Any other burning questions you'd like answered or experiences to share?
What kind of milk is everyone using? I had been using almond, but we're nut-free now. I'm in a semi-rural area, so it's been kind of a pain to keep from running out.
Also, I'm considering using Amazon's auto-shipments once I find a good alternative, so shelf-stable would be a bonus.
______________________________________
If you have a Hu Hot (Mongolian Grill), they're good for a sit-down restaurant.
You can look up safe beer and wine on barnivore.com
I bought rice milk this time, but I don't really like the flavor of it. I haven't tried hemp or oat yet, they're on my list for next time, though.
I'm going to have to spend some time researching.
@lovelainie I use rice milk for baking and make my own almond milk. It is super easy, I'll post a link when I'm on a PC later. But you can buy a pound of raw almonds and keep them in the fridge for weeks, then make batches of the milk as you consume it. It won't have the added calcium of store bought, though.
Well, it's official...my first MSPI check in here and on my BMB.
1. How are you doing? How is your LO doing? Today at DD2's 1M appointment (she's really 6w today), we discussed her symptoms: reflux, mucousy green poop, extreme fussiness, arching/stiffness after feedings, bumpy rash on face/neck/chest, and now....blood in her diaper. Today was the first time for blood and although it freaked me out, I'm actually relieved it happened while at the doctor. I've been advised to remove all dairy, soy, egg and nuts from my diet. Yesterday I had a bit of all of that and today had blood. After 2 weeks, I will introduce nuts or eggs to rule those out. Pedi wants to hold off on reflux meds for now to see if the diet change will be enough but we plan to incline her naps and bed time now.
2. What have you been surprised to learn has hidden dairy and/or soy in it? Well, I start today but I can see it's going to be in everything. I used to be Paleo pre-pregnancy so I plan to go back to my old recipes, although they included a lot of eggs and nuts. Fingers crossed that I can rule those out after a couple weeks. If we do, I LOVE this Paleo site: www.paleomg.com, if anyone is interested.
3. Any other burning questions you'd like answered or experiences to share? I'm sure I'll definitely have some next week since I'm just starting. So far, I'm reading everyone else's experiences and welcome any advice!
1. How are you doing? Yesterday I was feeling deprived, but today (Fat Tuesday) I'm feeling better. We had Chipotle tonight, so it was nice not to have to cook. And the Enjoy Life Double Chocolate Crunch granola saved the day!
How is your LO doing? DS's eczema is still flaring. For the past couple of days he has developed hives off and on during meals. Poops are fine. Mood -- the days he has hives he's fussy too. Today was a good day, though.
2. What have you been surprised to learn has hidden dairy and/or soy in it? My multivitamin. I was also surprised that many brands of canned tuna has soy. Sprouts brand does not.
3. Any other burning questions you'd like answered or experiences to share? At my library I checked out the Learning to Bake Allergen-Free: A Crash Course for Busy Parents on Baking without Wheat, Gluten, Dairy, Eggs, Soy or Nuts cookbook and am very excited to try some of the recipes. If anyone else has cookbook or recipe websites they like, please let me know.
I was kind of wondering if I was going to be eliminating too much and if that would make it harder/longer to pinpoint the specific issue(s). I want to do make her as comfortable as I can, as fast as I can. I'm nervous about the calories too and my supply suffering because of that.
I am a little surprised by the plan to re-intro nuts or eggs after 2 weeks. It can take 3 to 5 weeks for milk and soy proteins to clear out of both your systems, and I do think the same is true for other foods as well. You might seek a second opinion, or ask for a referral to a pedi GE. I suppose if her symptoms have cleared after 2 weeks that time frame is just fine, and maybe you'd hold off if she's still having symptoms.
With my DS we took the gradual approach. First dairy, then soy, then eggs and peanuts (same as you, I was eating a lot of those so I just cut them out at the same time), then wheat. Most of his discomfort dissipated when I cut dairy, so he wasn't too bad off, and the gradual approach seemed fine for us.
Maybe you could give your pedi a call to clarify. She might just be intending the 2 week appt to be a check in. GL!
2. What have you been surprised to learn has hidden dairy and/or soy in it? There's dairy/soy in just about everything
3. Any other burning questions you'd like answered or experiences to share? Sooooo- does nuts and eggs go through breast milk? I did have eggs but I'm wondering if they put milk or butter on them or if the eggs go through the milk?