Some reassurance needed (big baby)

sopranoali · March 2014

I know we've had the big baby discussion before...my EDD is 3/16 and baby was measuring 40 wks at last weeks ultrasound (8.5 - 9 lbs they think). Yes I know u/s's can be off.

Fast fwd to my appt today. My midwife did the Leopold something or other where they basically feel your belly with their hands and guess the baby weight. She thinks 8.5 lbs too.

This is where it gets hairy. They are having me get another u/s this Wednesday to look at weight, fluid, placenta etc. The midwife said "and at next week's appt we will be checking your cervix and we will be talking about induction and at least stripping your membranes. Because a 10 lb baby is too big for a first time mom."

I just really wanted to go into labor naturally when my body was ready and I'm conflicted about their size estimate, and I just feel kind of powerless when my midwife is saying closed things like "we will" and "10 lbs is too big", instead of saying we can talk about these options.

I don't know...reassurance and any advice appreciated!

P.S. I do understand how serious shoulder dystocia is and I don't want that to happen, so I'm not completely just going to go against the grain and not be open minded about what they suggest. They're just starting to not sound so much like suggestions...more like demands.

nicolecoy · March 2014

I think its all an estimate, nobody can make you be induced. With my first they estimated my daughter by u/s and my midwife feeling my belly to be over 9 pounds and scheduled me a csection. I was a ftm, had no idea so I went along with it and my daughter was only7lb 14oz! My sil is due with her first baby March 15, her baby has been breech this whole time but moved head down last week, she has way way to much fluid (her belly is measuring 5 weeks ahead), shes so wwolken and u/s estimated baby last week 8lb 6oz plus she hasnt even started to dialate and her dr hasnt even mentioned inducing. This is your first baby and our bodies are capable of alot so if you want to try a normal vaginal birth then I say stick to your guns, tell your midwife no induction unless theres medically a problem. Good luck!

KTdid81 · March 2014

I'm in the same boat. Expecting a 9-10+ lb baby. My doctor didn't say anything about the weight as a concern. She was more concerned about his head measuring at 40 weeks when I was only 36 weeks. I told her I didn't want to be induced and she said ok, but if I get to 40 weeks we need to discuss again because his head might be too big to get out.
Tell your midwife how you feel and see if you can come to an agreement.

Moedowell · March 2014

My first was a big baby.. You're body can do it I'm proof! It's not easy and definitely hurts but try not to stress yet as they can be a little off the estimate!

I was 3 wks late with my son, was not induced, didnt strip membranes anything just waited.. Had an epidural but they turned it off and kicked the potocin up to keep the contractions going, then I pushed for 45 minutes, his shoulder did get stuck the dr went up the old fashioned way and pulled him out.. He was 9-8, and I did tear but otherwise it wasn't bad..pretty comparable to my 2nd delivery except the 2nd was only 7-9.. Lol!
Like I said it definitely hurts but you can do it!! Try not to be too nervous just yet!!

BrideNamedMeg · March 2014

She can talk about induction all she wants, but that doesn't mean you have to agree to have one

Stripping membranes is fairly low risk as far as induction methods go since it won't work unless your body/baby is ready for labor. It is stressful when they talk about things in absolutes like that though.

My DS measured on track and wasn't estimated to be big but he was 9lb, 5oz at birth and while his labor was tougher due to his position, I didn't tear and my recovery from the birth was very easy.

On the flip side of weight estimates, one of my cousins was told her baby was going to be "about 8 pounds" and she was 10lbs, 3oz! She gave birth vaginally no problem. I'll bet if they had known how big the baby was though she would have been pressured into a c-section.

liamandlettie · March 2014

I think its very odd she said a 10lb baby is too big for a first time mom??? Yes, it can be but thats not something I would want to hear. I had a 10 lb baby and tore badly , however, my girlfriend had an 11 lb baby and was induced but no tearing at all! There are so many factors. I also have an US Wednesday to check weight etc. but my doctors are still confident with a vaginal delivery even after my first experience(and i make them remind me every appt!)I know there are a lot of moms on here with positive birth experiences with large babies. Talk to her again and explore all your options. There is no way to predict how your body will handle labor and delivery but having someone tell you that would definitely nerve racking!

liamandlettie · March 2014

I just want to add that I am due 3-14 and my doc said that if my ultrasound on Wednesday shows she is even high 8lbs...he doesnt consider that a large baby and would still proceed with a vaginal delivery. If shes in the 9-10 range then we have to talk about a back up plan. Good luck with everything!

nickied143 · March 2014

I had the opposite happen with DS, they told me that he was measuring too small, and my fluid was low, that I was lucky if he made it 6lbs, they expected 5lbs. He was 7lb 2oz, I dont put too much stock into it. What will be, will be.

FroeschleN · March 2014

I don't have any experience with this, but a friend of mine had an almost 10 pound baby. She delivered him naturally and is a FTM. She's a really skinny girl and you would never think that she pushed out a 10 pound baby. Of course everyone is different, but I don't think it's impossible to do.

jessher · March 2014

OK, having big babies is my niche.

I have had 4 babies between 10-11 pounds, all natural with a midwife without tearing, getting stuck, or any other interventions.

I am 5'5" and when not pregnant I am a size 4-6, so I am not a big person nor do I have monster hips. I am a normal size person who had supportive, educated midwives that had the patience to let me birth my babies without fussing at me.

My first baby did take me at least an hour to push out, but that isn't too unusual for a FTM. The most important thing is that you believe in yourself and your ability to birth the baby you grew. It's so much harder to have that confidence when your care team isn't showing their confidence and is instead threatening to induce. What your midwife said is absolutely false. FTMs have 10 pound babies just fine!

pepperedmoth · March 2014

Everything @jessher and @bridenamedmeg said.

My fundal height is measuring ahead, has been since they started checking, and when I get anxious over this, my midwife says calmly, "Women tend to grow the size of baby that is just right for them. You will do fine."

Their practice has only a 10% section rate and a normal morbidity/mortality rate, so I think she knows what she's talking about.

myfriendscallmemeg · March 2014

pepperedmoth said:
Everything @jessher and @bridenamedmeg said.

My fundal height is measuring ahead, has been since they started checking, and when I get anxious over this, my midwife says calmly, "Women tend to grow the size of baby that is just right for them. You will do fine."

Their practice has only a 10% section rate and a normal morbidity/mortality rate, so I think she knows what she's talking about.

I feel like this needs to be repeated at every appointment. That's genius, and makes sense on so many levels.

matitice · March 2014

At my last appt. Which was the day before I had LO my doctor said she thought he'd be a 7 lbs. baby. When he was born & he weighed 8.2 lbs. I was a little shocked. I always knew they weren't 100% accurate on their information concerning baby size I realized then though that they were really just guessing. Had we gone to term (today) he'd probably have been on the heavier side of 8 lbs.
I think that this is your body, your baby, & ultimately your decision if 10 lbs. is to big for you. Women have big babies everyday whether it's their first or their fifth. Your doula is there for support & to be sure that your best interest is taken into consideration. Unless there is some medical reason she feels you can't birth a 10 lbs. baby I say she keep her opinions to herself & allow you to decide what you want.

sopranoali · March 2014

Thanks everyone. My practice has 3 midwives and let's just say the one I saw today is my least favorite.

My doula seems to think unless there is a clear medical reason (low fluid, bad placenta) for inducing, I am ok to say no if that's what I want. I hope this baby decides it's time to come before my next appt and save me the awkward conversation!

SassyFlats · March 2014

I just want to say I feel for you! That discussion would freak me out, too! LO was estimated 7lb 5oz at 37 weeks, so I'm a smidge concerned about size but I keep reminding myself that the u/s isn't perfect and that my body won't grow a bigger baby than I can handle.

Good luck with that midwife! I hope you can get some info under your belt and have a productive conversation about how to get the best care for you and LO without going too far.

pepperedmoth · March 2014

This is why I'm not getting a third tri ultrasound.

SassyFlats · March 2014

I try to just consider it mostly for the purposes of checking amniotic fluid. Part of me is really happy to know I've got a healthy-sized baby growing away in there. Another part of me thinks that the numbers are just too much info that I can't do anything about... much like dilation.

memo9 · March 2014

pepperedmoth said:

This is why I'm not getting a third tri ultrasound.

Yep. DS was 9lbs 8oz at 37 weeks 5 days. I would not have wanted to know that. Thank goodness he decided to come early.

Shawnkm16 · March 2014

I'm 38w 5days with GD. At Fridays u/s baby was estimating 9 lb 3oz. My doc isn't concerned about shoulder dystocia or me not delivering vaginally, something about the head to belly ratio. Even though I'm an u/s tech, I'm chosing denial about size. I keep telling myself everyone is wrong and I'm going to have a 7lb baby. Lol

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