For those who are done having children

acethebase · March 2014

I can't remember if this has been discussed but I'm curious why are you done having children? Is it financial reasons, unable to, can stand kids etc..?I was going to "thread jack" but I didn't want to be rude.

#curiousitykilledthecat

EmJ&B · March 2014

DH and I both have very high maintenance sibs. We figured we'd have one, make him the center of our world, and call it good.

;-)

That and finances

[Deleted User] · March 2014

The user and all related content has been deleted.

Gatorsgirl731 · March 2014

Our finances fit two best. Age is another reason we are almost 34 & 46. After DS came along it took me 6yrs to want a second, then another 6yrs and a combo of reasons to get KTFU. Now with DD it feels sometimes like having 2 only children. Oh and our house is a 3 bedroom and almost paid for. I have no intention of moving or taking on a new mortgage.

Foofie&thebean · March 2014

We are one and done by choice. I'm a second child and after my mom had me she had to be hospitalized with severe ppd. I have had a rough time with ppd myself and out of fear of what the next one could bring we are done.

ballygirl · March 2014

We are 2 and done. We could never afford more than 2 and I'll be 39 and DH will be 47 this spring so we're old. It took us so long to get pregnant this time, I can't imagine going through it all again.

Jenball717 · March 2014

2 and through here.
After dd1 I went through some major ppd and it almost wrecked our marriage and I almost didn't survive it, to be completely honest. It was terrifying.

We decided to monitor my mental state thoroughly before deciding if we would have any others.
I knew I couldn't mentally handle the stress of a toddler and a newborn so we waited until dd1 was 6 to get pregnant.

I am having problems again with ppd so if we wanted another it would have to be another 6 year wait, not gonna happen. The compounded stress of multiple kids and the hormones would push me over the edge.

It makes me sad to think we are done, especially because dd2 is such a sweet, happy baby. But, I feel strongly that I should do my best to provide for any children we have and shouldn't overextend us, whether that be financially or emotionally.

TL;DR
I'm an emotional and mental wreck.

pmarie33 · March 2014

We are old (38 and 39), have one of each, and it took us 6-7 years to get pg twice.

I would love to be pg again, but we're done. If we were a few years younger, we would go for one more.

MissLauraPants · March 2014

One and done by choice here. I dont think I could go through this all again honestly...maybe I'm selfish.

manders726 · March 2014

1. Finances

2. Age (I'll be 35 this year)

3. We like the ratio of 1:1 for parent to kid.

MangoMama82 · March 2014

I always thought I wanted at least 2 kids. Then I had this baby. This beautiful refluxing, sleep hating, boob gobbling baby. I couldn't love anyone more than him, but I'm scared of what he will be like when he's mobile. Dealing with that and a newborn scares me. Also, I left my husband last week, and I'm creeping up on 32. I figure by the time I MAYBE find another man I MIGHT want to marry (doubtful), I will be a wee old to do it again.

#thatshowyouairoutyourlaundry

HFrizzle · March 2014

4 is a nice even #, I'm getting old and this last pregnancy kicked my ass.

allisonty11 · March 2014

Two and through. Finances and PPD. affected our decision.

pmarie33 · March 2014

MangoMama82 said:

I always thought I wanted at least 2 kids. Then I had this baby. This beautiful refluxing, sleep hating, boob gobbling baby. I couldn't love anyone more than him, but I'm scared of what he will be like when he's mobile. Dealing with that and a newborn scares me. Also, I left my husband last week, and I'm creeping up on 32. I figure by the time I MAYBE find another man I MIGHT want to marry (doubtful), I will be a wee old to do it again. #thatshowyouairoutyourlaundry

Is this new info? Or did I miss something?

Painterlady · March 2014

I have three ranging in ages from 11 to 5 mos. I reaaaalllyyy want to be done. I'm 35 and have been having babies since I was 23. My fiancé, on the other hand, wants one more. I feel bad because he only has one (my other two were with my ex husband) but I'm friggin tired. My uterus is tired. My mind is tired. I'm pretty sure I'm shutting this shit down.

pandaglitter · March 2014

Because pregnancy and birth were overwhelming. I wanted to see what it was like. No me gusta. No más bebes.

#isthiswheniairoutmylaundry
#idkifmymarriagewilllast
#fuckthepolice

CatieG · March 2014

Two unwanted but necessary c-section recoveries, both of which were awful, and I think we're done. We will revisit in two years but I'll be 35 by then and honestly, I hate the newborn stage. My nerves can't handle it at 33. I'm sure that won't get any better with age. Ha!

MangoMama82 · March 2014

No, I didn't make a new thread, I'm afraid he would find it. It got messy. There's a one year restraining order in play here. I retained a lawyer, and I have awesome support. My dad came out to help me get representation. Just ready to move forward! Though with our LO in the picture it will deft get drawn out.

Painterlady · March 2014

CatieG said:
Two unwanted but necessary c-section recoveries, both of which were awful, and I think we're done. We will revisit in two years but I'll be 35 by then and honestly, I hate the newborn stage. My nerves can't handle it at 33. I'm sure that won't get any better with age. Ha!

It only gets worse lol.

pandaglitter · March 2014

@mangomama82 I'm so sorry you're going through that. It sounds really messed up.

I hope you move forward and can have a drama free life with your little one.

MangoMama82 · March 2014

Thanks @pandaglitter! I have a feeling I will have 18 more years of drama on my hands!

JuneBug86 · March 2014

We are two and through.
I just can't handle the baby stage again. It would be a different story if I was one of those lucky people with easy going babies, but I'm definitely not one of them.

jennlin · March 2014

Number one reason would be the ratio of 1:1 parent/kids. Then probably the fact that I don't want to be pregnant again, and definitely not labor again.

StefMurph · March 2014

We are old. We have an 18 year old and were counting down the days until he left for college. We are very happy and over the moon in love with dd though. So basically we have two only children.

tashad18 · March 2014

Since I had DS1 young I decided I would be one and done because he was already 5 by the time I met DH. However, once I met DH and we got married we wanted more. My pregnancy with LO was relatively easy after a tiny scare in the first trimester. My labor and delivery went fairly well. So I think we will try for one more.

Inn2 · March 2014

Because of my age, infertility issues, and complications during pregnancy which would 100% carry into my next pregnancy, we agreed with my specialists that we should be one and done.

shelley1002 · March 2014

DH and I both felt 2 was good. We both grew up the oldest of 3 kids and wanted our kids to have siblings. But we knew 2 was good for us. And I don't see us changing our minds about it either.

CousinVicki · March 2014

we are oldish , am 38, husband is 40. I had to go through hell to get DS2 (multiple IVF's, miscarriages, et al......) So i am not going through that again. BUT i have one frozen embryo left that will be chronologically 37, so i might try again in a couple of years with that. that's a big maybe thoguh!! but never, ever with IVF or even naturally, i am too scared my eggz are getting old.