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Anxiety when baby cries

jenniferkissel32jenniferkissel32 member
in Babies: 3 - 6 Months
My daughter is almost 3 months old, and for her first 10 weeks rarely cried. The past two weeks though she has gone thru massive bouts of scream crying at least once a day. I think it's because she gets too tired, so I've tried to put her down to nap sooner to avoid the tears, but she refuses to nap and will just cry for an hour till she finally falls asleep and by that time it's almost time for her to eat again. This recent pattern of crying is causing me extreme anxiety and making me feel like a horrible mother, which isn't made better by the fact that I'm returning to work 50 hours a week on Monday. I feel like I can't leave her with anyone (my mom is watching her full time but still) because I don't want anyone to see her so upset and think she's an unhappy baby or that I'm failing her as a mother. Plus I'm afraid she will forget who i am since I work such long hours. The anxiety is overwhelming me and I could use any advice at all. Sorry such a long post!
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Re: Anxiety when baby cries

  • Princess_LilyPrincess_Lily member
    Have you heard of wonder weeks? Here is the link for the schedule:

    https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/FileUpload/1b/c46d48b7e4655a157cc1db5af0c367.jpg

    Looks like there is one which falls around your LOs age. HTH!
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  • Princess_LilyPrincess_Lily member
    edited March 2014
    ^this. Tried to add to my post but cell got buggy.

    Wearing DD is the most soothing activity for her that she will fall asleep for 1hr+. Also the boppy mimics holding and seems to soothe her too, as long as I sit next to her.

    Make sure all needs are met first (fresh diaper & well fed) and then try the methods.

    When we hear our children's cries, its our instinct to soothe them, and we can't, it makes us anxious.

    Remember, when it gets overwhelming to go into another room with earplugs (if you must) and breathe through the stress. Babies pick up on anxiety & stress...so try to find relaxation techniques. Try not to let her cry for an hour, its too disstressful. Try 10-20min max. I was there with DS, PPA is the pits.
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  • jenniferkissel32jenniferkissel32 member
    I absolutely don't just put her down and let her cry for an hour. I do everything I can to help her fall asleep (rocking, swaddling, sucking, feeding, car seat, gripe water, colic hold, everything!) but when she's started the crying there is nothing that seems to help. I'm a pretty calm person when I'm with her. The anxiety is more after she's stopped crying because I start to become terrified that it will start again. Maybe it's the wonder week thing, I'll definitely look into that. It's important to note that this only happens once, maybe twice a day, and around nap times. She always falls asleep quickly, happily and on her own at night, and sleeps thru 730 pm- 7 am. I was thinking I'm missing queues that she's ready for a nap and gets over tired, but the time frame from the first yawn to crying is 30 seconds...
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  • taraleannetaraleanne member
    I understand the anxiety about crying….it's so tough to see our LO's upset.

    If she's crying at nap time, I wonder if she's overtired? That's usually a sign for us. I need to get him down for a nap BEFORE the yawn. Yeah, hard to time, I know.  At 3m old her first nap will be probably an hour give or take after waking for the day and will likely get longer as the day goes on.  Watch for signs of disinterest in the activity, staring into space and then start your wind down routine. Even to this day at 8.5m old, a nap is easier when I've hit the mark before the yawning/eye rubbing/fussing starts.  Short naps at her age are very very normal so be prepared to be putting her down several times a day. 
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  • jenniferkissel32jenniferkissel32 member
    Thank you all for your advice! Hopefully things get better
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  • roo1ooroo1oo member
    I remember napping getting much tougher when LO was almost 3 months old. It gets better with time. Try all your tricks for soothing her, and try reading up on other suggestions. Try each trick for a few minutes before giving up on it. Every 15 minutes I tend to go through the list again, starting with diaper change, bottle, then each soothing technique. 

    I second wearing her. Also try going for a walk with her in the stroller. You might feel like you don't want your neighbors to hear her crying, but those with kids will understand whats going on. Or put her in the car and go for a drive. My LO will scream for 5-10 minutes in the car then take a good long nap.

    Also, completely agree that trying to get her to go down for a nap at the first signs of being tired helps a lot. I find with my LO that giving him a warm bottle and putting him down as soon as he starts disengaging or yawns the first time works wonderfully. 
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  • amm0512amm0512 member
    DS went through nearly a whole month whete he would cry inconsolably for about a hour at least once a day. It was never at the same time, so we were clueless to the cause of it. It honestly made me feel feel like a failure that I couldn't calm him. In the end, I would hand him off to DH who could handle the tears better than me. It does get better, I promise!
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