Ive been a little better this week, but still a bit lonely. Still exhausted and achy. Taking one day at a time. I miss my friends but I miss my baby girl more whenever I'm not with her.
I'm wondering if I should get checked for ppd. I have on and off days. Yesterday was bad, I just felt like I wanted to quite my job and regretted going back a week early. I'm hoping it was just the day but I'm nervous for my year review coming up next Thursday.
@sventurarn creepy interweb hugs to you. @Eggerkr I wish you way more good days than bad days @cashingn2 You and your family have been in my thoughts this week. Extra hugs to you.
Thanks for all of the support last week. i know my post was kind of all over the place. This week has been pretty rough emotionally. We moved LO to the crib in his room on Saturday and this is also my last week of maternity leave. I'm not ready to go back and I'm struggling with the thought of leaving him in daycare. I just had to drop off some paperwork this week and barely made it out of the door before crying in the car. Next week is going to be so hard. And to cap it off, it looks like LO has his first cold. Poor thing is so congested. Oh the irony of his happening the week before daycare.
I hope this week is going better for everyone.
@serend I hope LO gets better. Hopefully going back to work will go smoothly for you. I completely regret going back to work. I was supposed to turn in my 2 week notice yesterday but we are having a big event tonight and everyone was running around trying to get ready. Timing was definitely bad to turn it in. The last two weeks I've felt so much stress and anxiety and really don't even want to be at work. It's getting worse each day. I've even been crying at my desk. I just want to be home with LO.
I'm so sorry you all have to go back to work. I don't wish it on anyone. I want to be a SAHM more than ever. I feel like all I do is work and sleep. I miss my LO so much. Good luck to you all.
@eggerkr if you are wondering then get checked. It can't hurt. @serend thanks. Get well soon wishes for LO. @riv06marce I wish I could help but I totally feel you. Everyone says it gets better or you get used to it, but I'm still waiting. I feel like it just gets worse. hang in there.
I am having a REALLY hard week. LO has been really out of sorts yesterday and today, crying much more than usual. My anxiety is skyrocketing because I am worried it is a bad reaction to his vaccines on Tuesday. Google has led me to countless vaccine horror stories so of course now I am imagining the worst. I am also really discouraged because his reflux seems to be worsening again and his poop is green with specks of blood again. I am already eating an extreme elimination diet that is making me so hungry and I don't know what else to cut out since am pretty much only eating oatmeal, rice products and vegetables. I hate seeing him suffer and I don't know if I can survive much more of this.
@serend I am in the same boat as you. Maternity leave ends next week, and DS is starting daycare. DH had a cold and dispite my best efforts, I think LO got it. I sucked out lots of green snot and he's been sneezing more than usual. Pray that it's over before we start daycare. I don't have pto that I can take if he gets sick, it will have to be my husband. Also, I don't want to bring germs into there causing other kiddos to get sick.
I really don't want to go back to work. My boss s a bitch under normal circumstances, but now we are so understaffed and morale has sunk lower than ever, it has apparently made her 100x' worse. Plus, they are apparently keeping me in pre-op instead of working back in the OR like I was hired for. They put me in pre-op about a month before I was to deliver. Pre-op is ok, but I miss working in the OR. I'm nervous about starting IVs again, I hate poking people more than once and anesthesia isn't always helpful when you ask them (most are great, but there are some that I hate asking).
The one plus is I'm not the one dropping off DS, I get the good part in picking him up. I'm going to be a hot mess in the car at 5am by myself when I leave and he's not by my side. It makes me tear up just thinking about it.
Update on last week- The snuza battery STILL isn't here. DS and I did spend a night with him in the swing. The rest of the time he was back in his crib with me obsessively watching the monitor. Oh, and polar vortex and snow, YOU SUCK!
Additionally, thank you all for last week. You girls are amazing!
@NurseKMM How funny. My LO caught his cold from DH as well and he'll be the one that has to stay home on Mnday if LO isn't doing mich better. Sorry your work situation sounds sucky
oh the Snuza. Ours came the day LO started to get stuffy. I'm beyond thankful for it. I'm pretty sure I would have just stayed in the glider in LOs room not really sleeping if we didn't have it.
I've had some moments this week, but overall I'm doing okay. The thing that's killing me right now is that I called a couple of weeks ago and left a voicemail for my therapist to try and set up an appointment, and she hasn't called me back. I even left a couple of specific times that would work for me... and nothing. She should know how hard it is to reach out -- sheesh! So I guess I will be trying again on Monday, because I have a few things I really need to talk out.
Most of my anxiety right now is around sleep (no surprise there). DD1 is sleeping a little better, but she's still not back to her old solid sleeper status yet (and we have had quite a few bumpy nights). DD2 is, I think, hitting the 3-month growth spurt, up twice a night, and wanting to nurse All. The. Time. I'm tired.
@heaven802002 good for you. I'm sure you will miss LO lots, but mama needs a break every now and then. Whatever you do, don't feel guilty about it!! You need this! I am glad you are able to do it. Good luck and have fun
@boston143 my LO also had vaccines on Tuesday and she never got feverish but has been especially cranky and not sleeping as well the past couple days. I'm praying it let's up soon. Is your LO on reflux meds? If symptoms are worsening, he may need an increase in dosage, since its weight-based and they are growing so quickly. That's what happened with my LO and after calling the pedi, the dose increase worked like a charm. It was literally within weeks of her first dose she started to have symptoms again. Worth a shot. GL.
notthecheat
member
Re: Depression/ Anxiety Check-In *2/28/14*
@Eggerkr I wish you way more good days than bad days
@cashingn2 You and your family have been in my thoughts this week. Extra hugs to you.
Thanks for all of the support last week. i know my post was kind of all over the place. This week has been pretty rough emotionally. We moved LO to the crib in his room on Saturday and this is also my last week of maternity leave. I'm not ready to go back and I'm struggling with the thought of leaving him in daycare. I just had to drop off some paperwork this week and barely made it out of the door before crying in the car. Next week is going to be so hard. And to cap it off, it looks like LO has his first cold. Poor thing is so congested. Oh the irony of his happening the week before daycare.
I hope this week is going better for everyone.
@eggerkr if you are wondering then get checked. It can't hurt.
@serend thanks. Get well soon wishes for LO.
@riv06marce I wish I could help but I totally feel you. Everyone says it gets better or you get used to it, but I'm still waiting. I feel like it just gets worse.
I really don't want to go back to work. My boss s a bitch under normal circumstances, but now we are so understaffed and morale has sunk lower than ever, it has apparently made her 100x' worse. Plus, they are apparently keeping me in pre-op instead of working back in the OR like I was hired for. They put me in pre-op about a month before I was to deliver. Pre-op is ok, but I miss working in the OR. I'm nervous about starting IVs again, I hate poking people more than once and anesthesia isn't always helpful when you ask them (most are great, but there are some that I hate asking).
The one plus is I'm not the one dropping off DS, I get the good part in picking him up. I'm going to be a hot mess in the car at 5am by myself when I leave and he's not by my side. It makes me tear up just thinking about it.
Update on last week- The snuza battery STILL isn't here. DS and I did spend a night with him in the swing. The rest of the time he was back in his crib with me obsessively watching the monitor. Oh, and polar vortex and snow, YOU SUCK!
Additionally, thank you all for last week. You girls are amazing!
Edited for paragraph breaks
Dream celeb baby daddy- Prince Harry
oh the Snuza. Ours came the day LO started to get stuffy. I'm beyond thankful for it. I'm pretty sure I would have just stayed in the glider in LOs room not really sleeping if we didn't have it.
@boston143 my LO also had vaccines on Tuesday and she never got feverish but has been especially cranky and not sleeping as well the past couple days. I'm praying it let's up soon. Is your LO on reflux meds? If symptoms are worsening, he may need an increase in dosage, since its weight-based and they are growing so quickly. That's what happened with my LO and after calling the pedi, the dose increase worked like a charm. It was literally within weeks of her first dose she started to have symptoms again. Worth a shot. GL.
Get well soon to all those who are sick!