LGBT Parenting

Birth Story----(loss mentioned)

Brynlee’s Birth Story:

Monday February 17, 2014 I came home to Reva doing dishes and making me salmon and pasta for dinner.  It was the first day at work multiple people mentioned that I was starting to show.  We just found out that we were having a girl Wednesday the 12th. 

After eating salmon and watching some TV with Reva I was able to convince her to let me watch the bachelor, which she quickly got tired of and went to bed.  After the bachelor I went to bed around 10 pm. 

I woke up at 1:43am with liquid through my underwear and pajama pants.  I changed and put a pad on and went on google to search “leaking liquid when 18weeks pregnant” google told me not to worry and that most likely Brynlee was kicking my bladder resulting in me peeing.  I decided not to wake Reva up but when she got up to go to work around 5am I would check to see if I was still leaking.  When Reva got up at 5am I got out of bed and went to the bathroom.  I had leaked through the pad my underwear and my pants again. 

I told Reva I was leaking and she tried to call the Doctors office but they didn’t open until 9am.  She called work and let them know she was going to come in to unlock the door and then have to leave to take me to the doctor.  Then she found someone else who was able to unlock the doors for her and by 5:15 we were on our way to the ER. 

Once we got to the ER they took me in almost immediately drew my blood put in an IV then we waited.  We finally saw the doctor around 6:45 and he got us into get an ultrasound just after 7, it felt like we were finally going to get some answers. 

During the ultrasound we saw Brynlee’s heart beating and it was still strong at 160bpm. Reva and I looked at each other and started to cry because she was okay! The ultrasound tech quickly took several pictures and sent us back to the ER.  The ER doctor came in said baby is healthy but my amniotic fluid was low.  He informed us he didn’t know what that meant and that we needed to go up to Labor and Delivery.  Of course the nurse got confused told me to get dressed and gave me directions to our normal doctor’s office and pulled out my IV.  We told her that the doctor said to go to Labor and Delivery.  She went out to ask him quickly came back in told me that I needed to keep on my hospital gown and that she was supposed to leave in the IV and that transport would move me to Labor and Delivery.

I was transported up to Labor and Delivery they quickly got me into triage and things started happening quickly.  They did an exam listened to Brynlee’s heartbeat and tested the fluid coming out of me.  Through four different kinds of tests all confirmed that it was amniotic fluid.

Within half an hour the doctor set down the Reva and I and explained the Brynlee wasn’t developed enough to live without the amniotic fluid and we needed to discuss having a baby.  We both cried felt confused and completely helpless. Our beautiful baby girl was about to be forced into this world before she was developed enough to make it. 

I was moved into my own room and starting 10:30 am Tuesday morning until 10am Thursday morning I was constantly given drugs to force my body to dilate enough to deliver Brynlee.  The doctor kept trying to break through my cervix to get the process started but the pain of that was unbearable.  They offered and epidural but I refused, I wanted to feel her leaving my body and didn’t want to be numb to any of the process.  After two full days of trying to get labor to progress the doctor came in and explained that because my water had broken over 48 hours ago chances of me developing and infection were increasing and we needed to deliver her.  After a long 48 hours I finally agreed to an epidural and asked to be able to get up and walk around a little before receiving it.  I was up on my feet for a full 45mins just moving around when I felt what I though was her come out of me.  Reva ran and got the nurse.  She asked if I was comfortable having her deliver Brynlee I said yes.  She went to look and it wasn’t Brynlee who arrived but my placenta.  We waited for the doctor and within 15 minutes Brynlee had arrived. 

I told them if she was still alive I wanted to hold her the second she came out if not then I wanted to hold her after she was cleaned up.  Sometime over the stress of the last two days she had passed.  The nurse cleaned her wrapped her and a blanket and put a purple hat on her and then Reva and I got to hold our daughter and let her know how loved she is.  I thanked her, for saving my life and for arriving before the epidural so that I could be fully there in this moment. 

Brynlee protected me and gave her life for me.  There was a 50/50 chance that I was going to have to be rushed to surgery after delivery if the placenta didn’t come so I hadn’t gotten to eat anything since Monday night but my little angel Brynlee came out with the placenta. 

I spent all day Thursday being pumped full of antibiotics and got released from the hospital Friday.  The nursing staff made up a memory box for us (I still am not ready to open it) and a local funeral home is cremating her so that we can at least bring her ashes home.   

Brynlee I know you are out there now watching over us.  Your mommies love you!

Me: 30  DP: 30

TTC#1

IUI#1 9/26/13 BFN

IUI#2 10/26/13 BFP beta #1 99 #2 456

2/20/2014 Brynlee Madeline is taken too soon at 19weeks she was perfect

IUI#3 6/10/14 BFP beta #1 276 beta #2 722 20w A/S shows we are having a girl

 

 

 

Re: Birth Story----(loss mentioned)

  • No words can express how sorry I am for your loss and that you had to experience this. I am glad that you were at least able to go through this how you chose to. Please know that my thoughts will be with you and Reva during this time. It is very evident that Brynlee was loved.

    Me: 30  DW (aka C): 29

    Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12

    ***CP mentioned***

    We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm.  8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy.  We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET.  I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013. 

    11/14/14 -  Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good. 

    12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2

    12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)

    1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2

     ****All Welcome!****

    We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.

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  • I can not express how devastated I am for you. I can not imagine what you and your wife are going through and I know that there is nothing that can be said that can comfort you in this time of sadness. Just know that we are all here to listen and cry with you over the loss of your beautiful daughter. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your wife, as well as your precious Brynlee. 

    TTC our first. Married to, and madly in love with, my beautiful wife. Living with our fur baby and enjoying 19 nieces and nephews. 
    • DW and I have been tracking, preparing, getting medical testing since January 2013.
    • First Cycle: Unmedicated ICI w/ Donor Sperm 08/02/13: BFN
    • Second Cycle: Unmedicated ICI w/ Donor Sperm 09/11/13, 09/13/13, 09/15/13: BFN
    • Third Cycle: Unmedicated ICI w/ Donor Sperm: 10/13/13, 10/15/13, 10/17/13, 10/21/13: BFN
    • January 2014: Sonohysterogram shows excellent lining & tubes have no blockages
    • Fourth Cycle:  Monitored clomid cycle  w/ ICI's at home: 1/24/14 and 1/25/14. Ovulation verified:  BFN
    • Fifth Cycle: 02/2014 Femara 5mg with ovidrel trigger CD14: BFN
    • Taking a few months off to evaluate if we want to keep trying


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  • I'm so sad for you and Reva. Thank you for sharing your story with us so that we could honor Brynlee.
    ****loss discussed*****

    We're queer. I'm 33, have severe stage 4 endo, and had both fallopian tubes removed. My love ("Manada" on the boards, 32) was diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve. We did Partner IVF (my eggs, her uterus). We lost our twins Tavin and Casey at 21 weeks gestation.

    Our IUIs
    with @Manada: IUI# 1-7 (December 2012- September 2013) all BFN. Tried natural, femara, clomid, puregon/follistim, clomid and menopur combo, both the ovidrel and HCG triggers.

    Our IVFs:
    IVF #1 my eggs November/December 2013: Cancelled IVF due to poor response

    IVF #2 my eggs/Manada's uterus January/February 2014
    BCPs and lupron overlap Stimmed: 1/22-2/2: Bravelle and Menopur (dosage ranged from B300 and M150 to B375 and M150 to B300 and M225)
    2/4 retrieved 10 eggs. Endo was much worse than expected. Only 3 eggs fertilized; February 7 transferred two day 3 embryos, froze one. All great condition.
    BFP eve of 6dp3dt; Beta 1 (11dp3dt): 110; Beta 2 (13dp3dt): 175; Beta 3 (15dp3dt): 348; Beta 4 (19dp3dt): 2222; Beta 5 (21dp3dt): 4255
    1st ultrasound (3/6  6w 1d): TWINS!!!! Twin A measuring 6w1d with a heartbeat of 118bpm. Twin B measuring 6w0d with a heartbeat of 113bpm. 

    ***July 18, 2014 we lost our beautiful babies at 21 weeks gestation. They were born too early. Tavin Sara T. and Casey Elizabeth T. are beautiful and precious and we will love them and miss them forever.***

    FET #1 December 2014
    Intralipid infusion on Dec 10. Transfer of 1 day 3 nine-cell embryo into my uterus on Dec. 19. (acupuncture immediately before and after)
    BFP on Dec. 27; Beta 1 Jan 2 (14dp3dt): 665, Beta 2 Jan 4 (16dp3dt): 1859, Beta 3 Jan 6 (18dp3dt): 4449, Beta 4 Jan 10 (22dp3dt): 12,251.



      Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • I'm so, so sorry for your loss.  You, Reva, and Brynlee will be in our thoughts.

    Me: 28 DW: 28

    Together since 5/30/02. Married since 8/31/08

    IUI#1 - 12/13/13 = BFN

    IUI#2 - 1/22/14 = BFN

    IUI#3 - 2/21/14 = BFN

    IUI#4 - 3/23/14

  • I'm so sorry. I have no words, just tears. Praying that your love guides you through this.

    Me-33 DW-29
    together since 2009
    Married since 6/14/13 
    1st IUI (clomid+ovidrel) 10/14/13... BFP 10/26/13...                                                         
    EDD 7/1/14 ...MMC 11/22/13...D&C 11/25/13
                                                   
    2nd IUI (clomid+ovidrel) 1/15/14...BFN 
             
    3rd IUI (unmedicated) 2/12/14...BFN
    4th IUI (clomid + ovidrel) 3/10/14...BFN
    home ICI (unmedicated) 4/4/14...BFN
    home ICI (unmedicated) 5/2 & 5/3...BFN
    5th & 6th IUI (clomid + ovidrel) 5/28 & 5/29...BFN
    7th & 8th IUI (follistim & ovidrel) 6/24 & 6/25....BFN
                     
    **all are welcome**

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic  image Image and video hosting by TinyPicImage and video hosting by TinyPic 

    Daisypath Friendship tickers


  • I am so, so sorry for your loss.
    Married my wife 8/2007 ~ TTC #1 since 7/2011
    9 IUIs = 9 BFNs
    IVF October 2012: 22 eggs retrieved, 17 fertilized, 5 frozen
    ET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Blighted ovum discovered at 7w5d; D&E
    FET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Missed m/c discovered at 9w5d; D&E
    Karyotyping: normal ~ RPL Testing: normal ~ Hysteroscopy: normal
    FET #2: 1 blast transferred 10/25; BFP 10/31!
    EDD 7/13/14 ~ Induced at 37w4d due to pre-eclampsia ~ Born on 6/28/14
    *Everyone welcome*

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. You will be in my thoughts... Words can't express how my heart aches for you and Reva reading this. I am just so sorry...

    Me - 30, My wife - 31 , Together for 10 yrs - Married August 2012

    5 medicated IUIs w/ RE (March - July 2013) = BFN

    Fresh IVF Cycle in September 2013 resulted in 18 mature eggs, 16 fertilized, 12 made it to day 5. Transfer of 2 Grade A blastocysts on 9/15/13, and 10 embryos in the freezer!      *****BFP on 9/25/13 - betas: @10dp5dt = 232; @12dp5dt = 465; @15dp5dt = 1,581   *********William George born June 4, 2014*********
  • oh my goodness, I am so sorry to hear of your loss.  my thoughts and prayers are with you and Reva at this time.
    T & G My wife and I married 9/10/11 in Niagara Falls, NY
    HSG 12/12/12        
    #1 ICI 12/15/12              BFN on 12/29/12
    #2 ICI  1/11/13                BFN 1/28/13                       
    #3 ICI 2/11/13                 BFN
                   
    #4 ICI August 2013,  Clomid 100mg    BFN on 8/30/13 
    #5 ICI September-Clomid 100,  mg ICI 8/15 and 8/16,  BFN on 9/3
    #6 ICI October-Clomid 150 mg for 5 days   BFN 10/27
    uterine laparoscopy on 11/14-no endo or cysts
    #7 IUI December-Clomid 150mg    BFP 12/21
    12/23 Beta 51     12/26 Beta 209!
    First ultrasound on January 8th 2014-great healthy heartbeat
    Second Ultrasound January 23 (8 weeks) we got to see and hear the heartbeat
    Third Ultrasound Feb 4th(10 weeks), then will  released to OBGYN'
    It's a GIRL!
    We welcomed Adalyn Cooper Elizabeth on 8/29/14
    She was 7lbs 11oz and 19.6 inches long

    Proud foster parents to two little girls ages 2.5 yrs old, M,  and 1 year old, K



  • pauljlpauljl member
    edited February 2014
    Sharing your story is such a wonderful way to honor your little girl. Thinking of you. I am so sorry for your loss. 

    ETA: missing words
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers


    BabyFruit Ticker
  • I am so very sorry for your loss.  You and your partner are in my thoughts.
    Current pregnancy -
    First BFP on 1/4/22.  Due date 9/13/22.

    Four prior losses, no living children - 1 first trimester miscarriage, 1 blighted ovum, 1 chemical, and one extreme premature live birth daughter who died at 15 days old.


  • I am so so sorry for your family. I can't even conceive how you must be feeling. I wish you love and peace.
    IUI #1 - 10 April 2012 unmonitored and unmedicated with RE 
    IUI #2 - 05 May 2012 unmonitored and unmedicated with RE 
    IUI #3 - 05 July 2012 unmonitored and unmedicated with RE 
    IUI #4 - 30 August 2012 medicated and monitoredLetrozole and Ovidrel Trigger 
    IUI #5 - 27 September 2012 Letrozole 
    BFP! 9 October 2012 Betas:- 12DPO 16; 16DPO 96; 18DPO 315

    Baby Alarico born on 28 June 2013!!


  • I am weeping for you and your family - thank you sharing Brnylee's birth story with us. I am so sorry for you loss. I wish you and your wife peace and healing.
  • My heart breaks for you. I'm glad you were able to hold your daughter. I know that you will cherish that time with her forever. Big hugs and wishing you peace during this terrible time.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Brynnlee is so lucky you were her mommies. And I'm so sorry she came to soon. I'm glad you got to hold her and see her little face. The next while will be rough and feel impossible at times, know we're here for you. I'll be thinking of you.
    Lil'mamaz was born on Aug 21, 2014! She's PERFECT!

    It's been a long road to here...
    Me (43) and J (45) - same sex couple. And we don't feel 40+!
    June'12 - First RE Visit
    Sept. '12 - Tubes removed
    Dec. '12 - Donor Egg/Donor Sperm IVF Cycle - 4 good embies!
    Dec. '12 - Fresh transfer, BFP! EDD 8/29/13
    Mar. '13 - Missed m/c at 16w1d, baby boy stopped growing at 15w4d
    Loss due to umbilical cord clot...baby was perfect. :(
    Jul '13 - FET#1 - c/p
    Sept. '13 - FET#2 - BFN
    Dec.' 2, 2013 - FET#3 with our last chance embie - BFP!!!
    Dec' 26, 2013 - hb!!
    EDD 8/20/14 with a baby girl!
    Little S was born on 8/21/14 - 8lb, 14 oz and 20 inches long.
    We live in Seattle and used SRM for our donor egg IVF cycle


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  • Your ability to share this story is a beautiful testimony of your love for Brynnlee. I am so sorry for you loss and wish there were perfect words that could ease your pain. Take good care of each other, and try to recognize the moments of joy you do find in the aftermath of this tragic situation. I am thinking of you and hoping for peace for your family.

    Baby Hayden Frances born 12/20/14 at 11:11 a.m...  Our perfect little miracle.  Here's how we got here:

    My lovely wife:

    5 IUI's January 2013-June 2013- 3 Cycles with Clomid- BFN

     

    Myself: Genderqueer guy who hopped in the driver's seat of the baby making train

    IUI #6- 7/23- Monitored and Trigger on Day 12, with one 16mm follicle and one 18mm follicle- BFN

    IUI #7- 8/21- Not monitored, 50mg Clomid- BFN

    September and October: Missed Cycles due to vacation and a Half Marathon

    IUI #8- Monitored and triggered on day 15, with one 23x18mm follicle- BFN on 11/19/2013

    December:  Moved onto to see an RE to make a good plan.

    IUI #9- 1/1/2014 Natural Cycle, BFP on 1/15/2014,  6W Ultra-Sound Reveals nothing in Gestation Sack... Natural M/C at 7W, 2/3/2014

    IUI #10 3/21/2014- Natural Cycle- BFP on 4/1/2014 (please don't be an April Fools.  Beta #1 13dpiui- 48, Beta #2 16dpiui- 416, Beta #3 1018...

    1st Ultrasound- 4/22/2014- 6w4d HB- 134!

    Check out my Blog at: http://pregnantboithinksoutloud.blogspot.com/ 

  • Thank you so much for sharing Brynlee's story so that we can all honor her along with you.  I am so sorry for your loss, and my heart is with you and Reva.

    Married to my amazing wife 6/12/10 
    TTC since 6/11
    Unmedicated IUI #1 - 6/28/11 - BFN
    Unmedicated IUI #2 - 7/25/11 - BFN
    Robotic Myomectomy (Fibroid Surgery) - 11/15/11
    Unmedicated IUI #3 - 4/24/12 - BFN 
    Progesterone Supported Leuteal Phase IUI #4 - 6/21/12 - BFP!!
    Baby Boy G Born 3/24/13

    On to #2, are we crazy?
    IUI #1 - 11/28/14 - BFP!  Beta #1 (11DPO) 34, Beta #2 (13DPO) 101, Beta #3 (20DPO) 3043
    Ultrasound at 6w4d shows a single, fluttering heartbeat.  Say hello to Sticky Ricki!

     

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  • I am so very sorry for your loss :( thank you for sharing your birth story with us.  I wish both of you peace as you go through this.
  • I am so sorry for your loss, prayers for you both.

    Married in September 2010, started TTC journey November 2012

    Me-

    7 IUI- 2 CP- 2 BFN

    RPL blood work 12/27, showed a balance translocation in chromosome 11;22  

    Spouse-

    PCOS 4 IUI-4 BFN

    New Plan: Reciprocal IVF, me as carrier wife's eggs. Just went through insurance and received partial approval, so my part will go through my IVF benefits and wife's part will be out of pocket. Now just finalizing finance plans to cover the oop costs. Doctors office is in process of moving to a new building so there are no IVF start ups until March/April 2015. 



     

     

     

     

  • I am so so sorry for the loss of your little Brynlee. My thoughts are with you and Reva. 


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • There are no words to describe how bad I feel for you both. What a sweet mommy you were. I am bawling reading this. Love to you both. Cling to each other through this.


    10 medicated IUI's (3 with injectables). 
    IUI #1 (medicated) Jan. 2013-BFP!!!!- Beta's didn't double, MTX shot for possible ectopic.
    8 IUI's between April 13-April 14 = BFN 
    IUI #10 and final before IVF, injectables May 2014- BFP!!!!  TWINS!!!!

    7 week ultrasound showed 2 wonderful heartbeats!
    8 weeks to the ER with vaginal bleeding while on vacations!  Diagnosed SubChorionic Hemorrhage.  Babies are both great.
    9 week ultrasound showed both babies are still great.
  • I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing angel Brynlee's story. We will be thinking about you and Reva.
    Same sex couple, Married 8/6/11
    Baby Oliver born 11/27/13

    TTC stats with donor sperm...
    IUI #1 with trigger, 1/4/13 - BFN
    IUI #2 with trigger, 2/1/13 BFN
    IUI #3 with tigger, 2/28/12 BFP EDD 11/21/13
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