VENT: 1 step forward, 10 steps back — The Bump
Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

VENT: 1 step forward, 10 steps back

The other day I went to work. (I sign for deaf students in college classes). The topic of discussion? Death and loss of a loved one. I could barely hold it together. I literally balled my eyes out all the way home, I have an hour and a half commute!

Went to a party last night. Haven't really been out for 3 weeks. Someone said "you look good, have you lost weight". I wanted to crawl under the couch and die. "No I just lost the baby weight from 2 miscarriages back to back!! There were other moments/comments throughout the night that really hurt.

Am I the only one who feels like I take 1 step forward and 10 steps back? I went out to get my mind off things and relax and ended the night crying so hard my eyes were swollen this morning.

And all this is after the dog incident with the family the other day that I posted about.

I feel like just when I start to feel a tiny bit better something happens and I'm right back where I started. I told DH I just feel like I have the shittiest luck.

I'm just so frustrated. Sorry for another vent. I don't have anyone who understands.

Re: VENT: 1 step forward, 10 steps back

  • ::huge hugs:: it is crazy how things can happen at the worst time possible. I can't listen to the radio anymore constantly shutting it off. I don't care if Beyonce is pregnant!!! Sorry you had to go through that!
    Married my best friend 7/2/11 - Furbaby born 7/9/11 and brought into our home 9/1/11

    BFP#1:   2/2/13 ~ exact m/c date unknown but around 3/20 at 10 weeks ~ diagnosed with PMP ~ D&C on 4/5 ~ TTA for at least 1 year due to PMP ~ cleared to TTC 1/14

    BFP#2:   2/7/14 ~ m/c 2/20/14 ~ possibly due to chemical pregnancy ~ TG no D&C is needed 

    Surprise BFP#3:  4/4/14 ~ super duper extra happy (and nervous) about this one - EDD 12/9/14!!!

    John Joseph was born on 12/12/14 at 7 lbs. 11 oz.  He is the most beautiful rainbow baby we could have wished for!


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  • I have been married for about a year and a half and I'm 21 years old...during the course of this time I have already had 2 miscarriages. I am now pregnant again and everything was going well. I started bleeding 3 days ago and am 99.9% sure I have once again, miscarried...I understand what you are going through...and would love advice from anyone offering.
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  • You are definitely not alone! I lost it in the grocery store the other day in the produce section... saw whatever fruit it was that baby would have been this week and cried!

    Take it one day at a time... that's about the best we can do right now...

  • I'm so sorry for your losses. I feel like my emotions are running uncomfortably close to the surface too these days.  I bawled my eyes out for an hour after seeing a coupon for huggies. I lost my mind after my follow up to my D&C (when they put me in a room, with paper thin walls, next to a woman getting an sonogram and telling her how beautiful she and her baby looked). I thought I was going to jump out of the window.  A good friend, who also happens to be a therapist, has told me that I need to let the hurt, hurt. That I should cry when I feel like crying in a comfortable space.   That have been trying to keep myself together a little too much which will only hurt more in the long run. All I can say is that I get up every day and try to live as normal a life as I possibly can. HUGS.  
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