Infuriating Toddlerisms

happylady07 · February 2014

My son is in this stage where he asks for something to eat, this morning it was a banana, acts all excited as he watches me peel it and then when I go to hand it to him throws a massive fit saying he doesn't want it anymore.

*bangs head against wall*

He also is fond of throwing a massive fit telling me he is hungry, despite the fact that I just placed food right in front of him. THAT food isn't what he wanted evidently. Momma don't play kid. I hate starting our day off like this.

MandMLeona · February 2014

Been there done that. Sorry it's so universal...I was hoping it was just my overly sensitive DD.

4PrivetDrive · February 2014

My two year old brought me a jar of jelly this morning. So I thought he wanted a PB&J. NOPE. You would have thought I was trying to torture him when I gave him the sandwich. Oh the horror. :-S

BeachM · February 2014

DS will be 3.5 in April and this has gotten better for us. Definitely infuriating. I just ignored the freak out.

TiffaniMay · February 2014

We're dealing with that now too. Like this morning for breakfast, he said he was hungry and wanted cereal. I gave him cereal and he immediately shouted "I NOT hungry! I want a cookie!" Um, no?

lckcdc3 · February 2014

Last night he said he wanted pasta so I made it. He took 1 bite and said " no! Cereal!!!" Wtf kid! The other morning he had a cat 5 meltdown because I wouldn't let him have pizza for breakfast. Fun times!

MC03 · February 2014

Oh yes.... I understand. Yesterday I picked DD up from daycare and during the 5 minute car ride home she started screaming and crying because she wanted milk (which of course I didn't have in the car for that 5 minute drive). Then as soon as we got home I got her a cup of milk and she threw it (thank god it was a sippie) and said "I don't want leche! (milk)" and looked at me like I had handed her poison.

MC03 · February 2014

cruelsound said:

Oh girl, JUST YOU WAIT.

How is that for being helpful?

I've had so many people tell me this and it is terrifying!!

chase16 · February 2014

Oh god. As a FTM.. this is frightening me. I have VERY little patience, and I don't deal with irrationality well. (Even friends' kids I will try to reason with, until someone points out that there's no point). What have I gotten myself into??

marathonmommy82 · February 2014

chase16 --- I don't have much (any) patience and it's SO frustrating for me to deal with my 3 1/2 year old sometimes. I can't reason with him yet but we're getting there. I take lots of deep breaths and TRY to remind myself that this will pass. A couple of weeks ago I was SO frustrated and he kept kicking me and yelling that I threw him in the crib and shut his door. I needed a break and my H wasn't home.

My 3 1/2 year old now says, "Don't say no to me, guys" to H and me

MollyHooper · February 2014

I don't really have anything helpful besides saying that I am right there with you.
we are right in the middle of potty training the three year old. This kid can hold it in for 20 minuets on the toilet only to go in his diaper seconds later. right now I'm trying just getting rid of the diaper.

3yo will throw tantrums if he doesn't have food in front of him the very second he is hungry and the 2yo will just flat out refuse to eat if it isn't something he likes.

Moral of the story, toddlers are awful.Cute, but awful.

BeachM · February 2014

chase16 said:
Oh god. As a FTM.. this is frightening me. I have VERY little patience, and I don't deal with irrationality well. (Even friends' kids I will try to reason with, until someone points out that there's no point). What have I gotten myself into??

You will learn patience. I don't have much either and have slowly built it up. If you can remember that they are not miniature adults and are supposed to be defying you, it gets a bit easier. That and wine. Lots of wine.

Bethbilz · February 2014

flip_flops said:

Oh god. As a FTM.. this is frightening me. I have VERY little patience, and I don't deal with irrationality well. (Even friends' kids I will try to reason with, until someone points out that there's no point). What have I gotten myself into??
You will learn patience. I don't have much either and have slowly built it up. If you can remember that they are not miniature adults and are supposed to be defying you, it gets a bit easier. That and wine. Lots of wine.

Yes, wine was my survival technique most days...which is the only thing I truly miss while pregnant. Kids are just a-holes sometimes...adorable, cuddly, a-holes.

I'm a no-bull kind of mom, so I usually just laugh at their tantrums, sometimes record them for proof later on in life, and walk away. They work it out eventually.

lizztheo · February 2014

My son does not talk yet so he will point at a cabinet and then shakes his head no for everything I pull out of said cabinet. He is also going through the 18 month sleep regression which is the WORST.

chase16 · February 2014

Bethbilz said:

flip_flops said:

Oh god. As a FTM.. this is frightening me. I have VERY little patience, and I don't deal with irrationality well. (Even friends' kids I will try to reason with, until someone points out that there's no point). What have I gotten myself into??
You will learn patience. I don't have much either and have slowly built it up. If you can remember that they are not miniature adults and are supposed to be defying you, it gets a bit easier. That and wine. Lots of wine.

Yes, wine was my survival technique most days...which is the only thing I truly miss while pregnant. Kids are just a-holes sometimes...adorable, cuddly, a-holes.

I'm a no-bull kind of mom, so I usually just laugh at their tantrums, sometimes record them for proof later on in life, and walk away. They work it out eventually.

My parents totally did this with me.. There are several photos of me as a child, red faced and screaming my head off. I distinctly remember my father laughing at me on more than one occasion as well.

Makes sense, what you all said. And I know once it's my own, I'll feel differently because s/he is mine. If all else fails, I love wine.. One day at a time.

Nuclearcupcake · February 2014

happylady07 said:
My son is in this stage where he asks for something to eat, this morning it was a banana, acts all excited as he watches me peel it and then when I go to hand it to him throws a massive fit saying he doesn't want it anymore.

*bangs head against wall*

He also is fond of throwing a massive fit telling me he is hungry, despite the fact that I just placed food right in front of him. THAT food isn't what he wanted evidently. Momma don't play kid. I hate starting our day off like this.

Right there with you! *bangs head on wall with you*

sarahinthecity10 · February 2014

lizztheo said:

My son does not talk yet so he will point at a cabinet and then shakes his head no for everything I pull out of said cabinet. He is also going through the 18 month sleep regression which is the WORST.

ohhhh the 18 month sleep regression almost broke me..........

MC03 · February 2014

@cruelsound I seriously teared up hear at my desk reading about your night last night, because I so totally can relate to those emotions. And I just have one to deal with. But you're right, the only thing to do is move on to the next tantrum they throw your way.

spacedolphin11 · February 2014

We all eat the same thing for meals, but randomly my 2-year-old will decide he just HAS to have the food from MY plate, the milk from MY glass, etc. He also does the I-really-want-that-food-until-you-give-it-to-me thing (and then he gives it to the dog.) His newest 'trick' is to make us guess what he wants - whether it be clothes or bedtime stories: "That's not the right one! THAT's not the right one!" until we somehow randomly stumble on the 'right one'. He's very verbal and could tell us what he wants, but nooo.

In the same vein as taking pictures of you kid mid-tantrum, I love Reasons My Son is Crying. It helps me remember that we're all dealing with irrational little people!

NicoleKoch25 · February 2014

Been dealing with the same here. DS is not talking yet so it's all day whining and frustration. Some days he eats some days he throws his food everywhere. On top of it he's getting his molars. I.want.to.scream.

Nuclearcupcake · February 2014

cruelsound said:
Let me tell you a true story from last night, during dinner with my two toddlers.

Five minutes into dinner, I picked up a plate of food and threw it on the floor, in full view of my husband and my kids.

Why? Because, no matter what we do, every single meal is a fight. We've tried so many different things but, most meals, without fail, they scream about the food choices, throw yogurt on the walls, fling utensils at each other, put their food into the milk and then give it to the dogs, all of it. I'm not kidding. It's worn us down to the point that there is this awful energy in the house, leading up to meal time. Like I said, we've done everything we can think of to fix the issues, but nothing is working. Their doctor isn't concerned, seeing as when they do eat, they eat everything. They are growing just fine, so we're left with, "Well, everything looks fine." It's not. And so, last night, once we all sat down and the shit started to hit the fan AGAIN, I couldn't control myself anymore. I picked my oldest's plate up and hurled that shit on the floor and then stated crying. And then he got upset and I lost it even more, because here I am, at my breaking point and I'm STILL fucking everything up.

Toddlers are an all-encompasing, full time gig. They do things that literally make no sense, there are days where you don't think you can do anymore and wham, shit goes down and you're throwing a plate of food on the floor. I hugged them both so tight after that and will never, ever forget the moment I finally lost it. I'm going to do my absolute best to never get to that point again, even if it was just pizza on the floor. But there is nothing wrong with a 2 or 3 year old getting the best of you. The entire world-shattering episodes that can stem from a banana being opened the wrong way? When it happens every single day, it can really mess you up.

So yeah, don't beat youself up over what toddlers do. You do your best and, if they insist you aren't, there's not much you can do but move on.

Thank you for sharing your story. It's refreshing to know when you're not alone in these toddler struggles, seriously. I've been at that point of "DONE".

happylady07 · February 2014

Just venting and hearing that I'm not the only one with a freak lunatic child makes me feel better, thanks guys.

Personally my frustration is just mainly on me, I know I'm a control freak and I hate that I can't rationalize with him and fix the situation, or at least make it slightly better. I need to just repeat over and over, toddlers don't make sense, and are pretty much designed to push buttons. And I wish I could have a beer. Ha!

marathonmommy82 · February 2014

Another THANK YOU to everyone on this thread who chimed in.

We get home from work/ daycare around 6, 3 1/2 year old goes to bed at 7:30/ 8, and those 2 hours feel like 5!

He usually doesn't eat dinner (I'm sorry, who doesn't enjoy an english muffin pizza or mac and cheese? it's not like I'm trying to shove raw brusel sprouts down his throat) and then will throw a fit because whatever.

At work we call Monday TGIM. I have no idea how SAHMs do it. Seriously. I'd just be drunk all day.

kimberlybethh · February 2014

lizztheo said:

My son does not talk yet so he will point at a cabinet and then shakes his head no for everything I pull out of said cabinet. He is also going through the 18 month sleep regression which is the WORST.

My dd does the same exact thing!! She points at something in her toy box. I take out every single toy and she just keeps shaking her head and saying "no". The other thing she does when she wants something no matter what it is she will point and say baby. Baby means something different every time depending on what she wants. I have a feeling come August the word baby will no longer have a positive association.

lizztheo · February 2014

kimberlybethh said:

lizztheo said:

My son does not talk yet so he will point at a cabinet and then shakes his head no for everything I pull out of said cabinet. He is also going through the 18 month sleep regression which is the WORST.

My dd does the same exact thing!! She points at something in her toy box. I take out every single toy and she just keeps shaking her head and saying "no". The other thing she does when she wants something no matter what it is she will point and say baby. Baby means something different every time depending on what she wants. I have a feeling come August the word baby will no longer have a positive association.

It's horrible, he has maybe 5 words so it's a constant struggle to figure out what he wants. And I can't open the fridge around him because he LOVES pesto and if he sees the jar, he has a complete meltdown because he wants it. I was getting out eggs for breakfast the other morning and he wanted pesto for breakfast.

belle785 · February 2014

This is us with food too. It drives me crazy but I try not to worry about it/ take offense to it because what good is it going to do? There are a few days a week where he will just cry/whine through dinner and we do the best we can to keep it together.

I've noticed though lately that he is becoming picky with EVERYTHING. He wants his drinks only in certain cups, he can only wear certain shoes, he can only wear certain shirts, etc. ARGH!

Rosebean · February 2014

sarahinthecity10 said:

lizztheo said:

My son does not talk yet so he will point at a cabinet and then shakes his head no for everything I pull out of said cabinet. He is also going through the 18 month sleep regression which is the WORST.

ohhhh the 18 month sleep regression almost broke me..........

OH dear GOD! They sleep regress at 18 months? NOOOOOOO! DS will be 18 months when this LO is born. I don't think I can handle two kids keeping us up all night.....

Russiandea12 · February 2014

My son will be 3 next month and I can completely relate to all of this. Yesterday we had a 20 minute meltdown about not getting a Daniel Tiger toy that at BRU, that he told me he didn't want and put back on the shelf on his own. Then when we left the store total meltdown, it was hard not to start laughing when he was screaming " Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood."

happylady07 · February 2014

I had to run into a store for literally 2 minutes yesterday, but it was right at nap time so I stuck DS in a cart so I could make it across the store quicker. He freaked out that he wanted out and wanted to go as soon as we got to the other side of the store, I was like, "you are in luck! We're leaving right now!" And then he freaked out at the door when I tried to take him out of the cart, throwing himself on the floor and pointing back to the cart saying he wanted to ride again. Poor confused child. It really can be funny when they make so little sense.

JBrew101 · February 2014

@cruelsound- I AM SO SORRY! That is horrible and sometimes the figuring it all out part of parenthood is the hardest! Unfortunately no matter how many books you read on parenting the "right way" (whatever that means) there is no rule book that helps you through some of the most confounding moments. I only have one toddler and I get overwhelmed. I try to remind myself that "this too shall pass". I always look back on things with rose colored glasses and forget how tough it was at the time. I am sure one day we will all look back at this toddler period and miss the hilarious, ridiculous, frustrating, endearing, sweet and infuriating moments of our little people figuring out their way in the world. Unfortunately that doesn't help us in the now.

What I do, if it helps, when my crazy, stubborn, independent DD overwhelms me or has a fit that I just cannot fathom.....is to try and laugh. Otherwise I will end up in a heap on my kitchen floor in tears because I have no idea how to handle the situation. And then I give my husband the reigns while I go and take a quick and very hot shower. Somehow, for me, a shower or a jog always help me to get rid of some of the negative energy. And then I can come back to my real world and she will be done with whatever crisis she was going through and smile up at me and say "Mama" like she is so excited to see me. Taking a moment for me reminds me that she too is figuring things out and is frustrated because she can't fully communicate with me to explain whatever she wants or is feeling. I think figuring yourself out is hard no matter your age........

PsyDr04 · February 2014

happylady07 said:

My son is in this stage where he asks for something to eat, this morning it was a banana, acts all excited as he watches me peel it and then when I go to hand it to him throws a massive fit saying he doesn't want it anymore. *bangs head against wall* He also is fond of throwing a massive fit telling me he is hungry, despite the fact that I just placed food right in front of him. THAT food isn't what he wanted evidently. Momma don't play kid. I hate starting our day off like this.

This is my experience daily. So glad I am not the only momma experiencing this - it's maddening!

kcatboston · February 2014

sarahinthecity10 said:

lizztheo said:

My son does not talk yet so he will point at a cabinet and then shakes his head no for everything I pull out of said cabinet. He is also going through the 18 month sleep regression which is the WORST.

ohhhh the 18 month sleep regression almost broke me..........

Oh god....there is an 18 month sleep regression. I'm still trying to make it through the 9 month one without having a nervous breakdown. I'll just go sit in the corner and cry now.

PsyDr04 · February 2014

@cruelsound - Thank you for making me feel normal that I am not the only momma that has totally lost my sh*t in front of my kid. One time I threw his sippy cup of milk across the kitchen (hitting the wall) while yelling the F word really loudly (I'm so ashamed) and more recently, lots of screaming and throwing of things in the garage because he was acting up when I was trying to get him in his car seat. Ended up with me bawling in the driver's seat of my car as I just sat in the garage. Please hand me my Mother of the Year award now.

BeachM · February 2014

Mine did not experience any sleep regressions after the 4 month wakeful. I like to think this is because of my superior parenting and sleep training skills but more likely I just got lucky.

Raclla · February 2014

WTF?!

I have an 8 month old and one on the way. I may never survive.

*starts banging head against wall for practice*

tahitiansun · February 2014

I love this thread because it makes me feel normal! DS is so picky right now, he feeds almost every meal directly to the dogs and then screams for graham crackers. We are also in the middle of the 18 month sleep regression- a month early. He throws a tantrum when we put him in the crib but then falls asleep standing because he is tired and just doesn't want to lay down. Hoping it passes soon!!

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