Parenting
flyingsaucer
member
Pregnancies: planned or unplanned?
flyingsaucer
member
in Parenting
Were your pregnancies planned or unplanned? Both of mine were very much planned. I am a super type A control freak.
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Re: Pregnancies: planned or unplanned?
DD-pleasant surprise
Totally agree.
2 pregnancies, both planned
DS was unplanned, though I was taking BCP shipped into a Caribbean island on a container ship so it was likely heat damaged. I should have known it likely wasn't working right.
This LO was planned.
"Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae
Any question about family planning, including, "so, are you trying for #2 now," is rude to me IRL because that's really personal. DH and I are trying, but I've had 2 losses, and I don't really feel like sharing that with some random person at work. Or like my SIL who tried for 8 years without ever getting pregnant. That can be heartbreaking, and it's just not the kind of thing you bring up with someone who's not super close.
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
I think the problem with this question IRL is that it usually comes with a lot of judgement...at least in my experience.
Our Little Raspberry Born 3/27/12
I've also had lots of people ask me this, I just don't get why.
I never ask any family planning questions in real life because you never know someone's situation. But I don't see why it's a big deal on a message board. No one is being put on the spot.
The type A thing was a bit weird because type A can't prevent bc failure. My most type A friend had an unplanned baby.
G: 6.10
L: 11.13
I don't know if that makes sense.
We were asked a lot if she was planned by family and friends. It always bothered us, but we figured it was because we weren't married and he used to say he didn't want children.
Me: "not really"
"Oh she was planned?"
I can't get the ticker to work, but I have two sons:
Baby RJ, born 1/25/2014
Formerly Twilightmv
4 months later we were "not trying, not preventing." I remeber saying to H that we should stop trying for a bit and wait. 2 weeks later BFP. 《and it was wonderful!》
— The Doctor, Season 3, Episode 6
We got engaged after 7 months, with a 5 month engagement, and got pregnant 3 months after we were married. Apparently some of my friends and family are awful at math and think it was all 'a mistake'. It's annoying enough that people assume we only got married because we were pregnant by accident and that's not even the case here. I can't imagine how pissed off I'd be about some of the comments I've heard if that were actually the case.
The question doesn't offend me. There are a lot weirder questions asked on TB. If it was someone I didn't know well IRL it would be weird. But most people know he was unplanned because we were only dating four months. When I got pg.
Harry Styles = Life Ruiner
There’s a lightning in your eyes I can't deny
Then there’s me inside a sinking boat running out of time
Without you I'll never make it out alive
But I know, yes, I know we’ll be alright
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J. 1.14.13 my reason for breathing
We get asked all the time when we are having a second one. When we say we're not we've been told it's selfish of us to not have another one, told that we must be lying. I had a friend look at me and ask how I could never want to have another one as if I was less woman than her.
It's rude because while we.are perfectly fine being 1and done. It's mostly financial reasons we aren't having one and it bothers me when someone calls it selfish I want my kid to eat instead of give her a sibling.