Ok ok…I'm a dirty lurker too! And technically a fence-sitter since we haven't fully decided OAD yet.
DS is 2.5 and has been a real challenge. He has sensory processing disorder and we're just about to start OT for feeding therapy and the SPD. We also experienced infertility so getting to DS was a challenge (and factors into our decision of whether we'll try again). DH has always been accepting of whatever the outcome- whether that was no children or a child from treatments. Now we have that wonderful, spirited, handful of a child. DH is happy with one but might consider more maaaaaybbeeee.
So right now, we're OAD and we're reevaluating after DS has had some therapy and we see how he's doing and how we're doing as a couple and a family. Ultimately, we don't want to stress our marriage any further, and we want to address DS's needs as completely as we can. He has another evaluation in May. We also each get a lot of single parenting time due to DH's schedule that rotates every 4 months.
I'm a reformed lawyer, now in higher education administration. West Coasters. Currently training for my 4th half marathon.
Re: Another lurker coming out to play
The infertility experience has certainly colored our current decision. I'm not getting younger and I'm really not sure we'd go through treatment again...for so many reasons. It was a maddening and obsessive time. And then I think about how we can devote more to DS's needs if we're done. I wonder if my very practical husband has it right ;-) DS also still doesn't STTN.
Law school was an ok choice at the time, but now I regret the debt. Although I love my job and wouldn't have it without that degree and my experience.