PPA returning with a second?

Hi Guys,

I haven't posted in a while. But for those of you who may remember some of my past posts I struggled with a pretty bad late onset of PPA.  DD is now 2 years old ( hard to believe i've been posting for that long) but I had some complications at birth and some complications immediately after.  This created some kind of PTSD or something.  Postpartum eclampsia.   Anyway, I had not experienced anythign in my life to that extent and add in all the stress of being a new mom.  This went untreated for months- itw as only until about 10 months postpartum that I admitted something was wrong and boy was I in for a surprise at the damange it had done in my relationship.   It only got worse before it got better.  This past year has been a rollercoaster of trials and tribulations with my partner and it almost destroyed us.  We are still working together to get through it and time will only heal.      I used to be terrified of having another and terrified at what my husband would think about it- maybe he would never want another one.  

Recently, i've been getting the itch and i've been doing alot of reading about PPA reoccurance after your second.  I guess it seems to be about a 20% chance, maybe higher in some cases of coming back.  I've been told that now that you're out of the "first mother faze" you can know know the signs and symptoms and know how to reach out if it does happen again.   I'm very much stuck in the what if faze about it (which is part of the PPA) but i'm certain that if it did happen the exact same way againt hat my husband and I will not survive. 

I'm just wondering for those of you out there who have experienced this.  What was your second time around like?