Need to vent

najzomax · February 2014

We are perpetually broke but I tried not to let that ruin valentine's day....

I got up early with DD and made DH a card and one of his favourite breakfasts. I worked hard all day to make homemade potato skins, bruchetta with homemade bread, and chocolate covered strawberries. He did thank me for dinner and watch a couple episodes of House of Cards on netflix with me but it's 7:30 and now he is upstairs playing video games. I even told him that I didn't plan on Facebook or video games tonight and wanted tonight to be different

So now it's going to be like every other night were I get DD in bed and then read the rest of the night while he plays video games all night. Tomorrow he will expect to sleep while I get up with DD.

I got no card, no "happy valentine's day", not even a hug. I'm so disappointed but I don't want to say anything else. I want him to want to spend time with me, not do it because I bitched until he gave in.

Every single compliment I got today was from my neighbour.

It's a good thing I have that bottle of wine to keep me company tonight

I hope all of you are having a better night than I am...

MelissaMiso · February 2014

I will commiserate with you. We, too, are incredibly broke so I didn't expect anything huge. DH did get up and make coffee before I got up and cleared snow off my car (I had to work, he was off) and said happy valentine's day. That was it. I gave him his gift (a funky messenger bag) before I left for work. I also picked up flying saucers (his favorite dessert) and an ice cream cake from our favorite ice cream parlor on my way home from work. After I got home he gave me "my" gift which was two books and a dvd for Sophia. Very sweet, but not for me. He then talked about how he and she made a valentine's card and tucked pics of her in it which they went over to give to my inlaws while I was at work. I spent the evening taking care of her, bath time and getting her to be while he went to bed early since he had to work the Saturday. To top it off, this was the end of a really stressful, overwhelming week at work for me and I was literally crying about how depressed I am over our financial situation in the morning. So depressing. *sigh*

najzomax · February 2014

Aww that sucks melissamiso!

My vent just got better... As predicted he slept in this morning for an extra 2.5 hours and then complained when I told him it was time to get up at 9am. I told him if I can only sleep in until 8:30 on my sleep in days then he doesn't get to sleep until 10 on his. Then he got mad at me for being disappointed about last night and "my attitude". Then he proceeded to say "we" need to lose weight and that I need to stop snacking and eating so much. AND THEN he suggested that "we" should only have computer or iPad time from 7pm to 10pm because WE don't spend enough time with our daughter!

I am home alone with her 5 days a week. I do all baths, all feeding, all diapers. I am the one who gets her dressed and puts her to bed. I am the one who does crafts with her, takes her to the park, plays outside with her, takes her on play dates. He works full time so I do ALL of the chores except for taking the garbage to the curb and half of the dishes. He does dinner dishes and I do the daytime dishes so he doesn't have to do them. He doesn't even put the damn bag in the garbage can after he takes out the full one!

On top of that I also babysit another little girl 3 days a week for 9 hours a day! He comes home and "watches" DD while I make dinner unless the iPad is too exciting and then I end up watching her AND making dinner.

I swear he wasn't always a total a$$hole but right now the only thing that is giving me hope is the fact that he actually took her out to the mall for an hour so I could put away laundry in peace! If I am really lucky I might have time for a shower before he gets home. This is only the second time he has ever taken her out by himself....

He wants me to make all these changes but won't commit to making a doctors appointment that I have been asking him to make since OCTOBER!

MelissaMiso · February 2014

Totally sucks. It's hard not to feel resentment, right? My DH is a really great guy and I love him. We are just going through a couple of tough years (house burglary, hurricane flood, job losses and financial struggles) but I still get frustrated bc he has only been working part time while I'm working full time and a part time private practice. I keep applying for at least one or two jobs every week to try to find higher pay and he's only applied to maybe three in the past six months.

najzomax · February 2014

Definitely!!

MelissaMiso · February 2014

najzomax, I can't remember, do you live in NY? All I keep thinking is we should have a play date and vent. Hahaha

najzomax · February 2014

No, I'm in Ontario Canada. I wish we could tho!

bellelamb · February 2014

I'm sorry girls! It sounds like your dh'a need to step up! We don't have lots of money either but though couponing and cutting back I've been a sahm for 3 years with little problems so there are wYs to help the money stress.

najzomax · February 2014

Thanks belle! I've been couponing and price matching and we do ok. There just isn't a lot of money for extras. I'm not upset that we couldn't go out. I would have been happy with a homemade card. It's the thought that counts.

bellelamb · February 2014

Have you done restaurants.com we got a $25 gift card for $2 we need to spend at least $40 but still $17 for a fancy dinner for 2 is how were going out next week.

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