S+TM-kids around while laboring at home?

jrw526 · February 2014

So the game plan is to have another med-free hospital birth and labor at home as long as possible.

BIL is going to come over and watch DS (almost 3) while I'm on labor and while we're in the hospital.

I'm a little nervous that DS is going to get upset if he hears or sees me during a contraction. He can be pretty sensitive.

I didn't scream when I was in labor, but definitely moaned through contractions. Any advice on what to say to him so he knows I'm ok? We've already told him that when I have the baby I'm going to the baby hospital, not the boo boo hospital (another sensitive subject).

BabiesFTW · February 2014

Have BIL take him somewhere else? No need to scare the poor kid.

jrw526 · February 2014

If it's the weekend, he can take him back to his house.

BIL lives an hour away, but works in our town, so it makes sense for him to just stay at our house if it's during the week. He can drop DS off at daycare and then go to work.

aLsMay24 · February 2014

DS who's almost 2.5 has seen me through lots of pretty decent contractions so far so I'm not worried. The ILs will hopefully watch him when I do go into labor but they are about and hour and a half away. With the way my body contracts I won't know I'm actually in labor until I get to the hospital and they confirm it. If my water breaks, I'm GBS+ so I'm straight to the hospital and he will have to come along until they can get there to take him.

When I've been contracting in the past we just let him know everything is ok, mama's just having some contractions that hurt her a litlle bit and he gets very sweet and loving. I think kids can handle more sometimes if we are just straight up with them.

karacakes98 · February 2014

I wouldn't worry about it. DD watched me practically saw my thumb off when she was 3.5 and she was totally chill about it. She played the little nurse and brought me ice and a wet washcloth while I sat on the floor trying not to pass out or throw up. Knowing she was there kept me much calmer and more in control than I would have been otherwise, and she was completely fascinated by watching the ER doc stitch my finger back up.

Also, as PP said, it's good for kids to learn that labor isn't something to fear.

SurpriseAt39 · February 2014

I'm not sure how long I will get to labour at home.
DS was born 5 hours after my first contraction.
I had 3 contractions before I woke DH. He showered, we left for the hospital and I delivered 2 hours after arrival at the hospital.

This time, I'm calling an ambulance if DH isn't home. If he is, we are leaving for the hospital after my first contraction.
DS will go with us unless my sister is here.

jrw526 · February 2014

Thanks for the advice and sharing positive experiences. I was just planning on telling him that baby sister is coming and that mommy is ok. I think him seeing me between contractions will help him realize everything is fine.

ETA: typing fail

ProudMommy030614 · February 2014

My kids are older (10&8) but I plan to labor at home. H and I have explained to them in a G rating what to expect. Since I will be busy H can handle them!

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jlcccwyatt · February 2014

Mine are 14, 11 and 8...they all know exactly how the baby comes out...the older 2 just don't know exactly how she got there. They are all planning to be in the delivery room (by my head) when she arrives. They know that labor will be painful and they may have to leave to give me a break from time to time (no epidural).

ProudMommy030614 · February 2014

TallAsh said:

ProudMommy030614 said:
My kids are older (10&8) but I plan to labor at home. H and I have explained to them in a G rating what to expect. Since I will be busy H can handle them!
"And then the baby princess will pop out of the magical cave!!"

Nah it's another troll boy and he exits through the belly button!

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missyishere · February 2014

jlcccwyatt said:
Mine are 14, 11 and 8...they all know exactly how the baby comes out...the older 2 just don't know exactly how she got there. They are all planning to be in the delivery room (by my head) when she arrives. They know that labor will be painful and they may have to leave to give me a break from time to time (no epidural).

Me thinks the older two know exactly how babies get there. Plus, X_X

missyishere · February 2014

dotgirl2 said:
Maybe the 8 year old could tell them? Am I reading that wrong?

That's how I read it, too.

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jlcccwyatt · February 2014

FarmBoysWife said:

jlcccwyatt said:
Mine are 14, 11 and 8...they all know exactly how the baby comes out...the older 2 just don't know exactly how she got there. They are all planning to be in the delivery room (by my head) when she arrives. They know that labor will be painful and they may have to leave to give me a break from time to time (no epidural).
o_O;;

Please tell me that the older 2 don't know how she got there is a typo..

Sorry...I meant the younger 2. Obviously the oldest does but we were waiting til the middle on heads to middle school to give him the facts since he doesn't question it at all...

jlcccwyatt · February 2014

* middle one not on

missyishere · February 2014

An eleven year old totally knows about how babies are made.

SurpriseAt39 · February 2014

jlcccwyatt said:
Mine are 14, 11 and 8...they all know exactly how the baby comes out...the older 2 just don't know exactly how she got there. They are all planning to be in the delivery room (by my head) when she arrives. They know that labor will be painful and they may have to leave to give me a break from time to time (no epidural).

Ya, glad this was an error.

LW78 said:
They probably all know. One day my 7 yr old asked me if I was having sex when DH and I were napping. I was like, DAFUQ DID YOU JUST ASK ME?

Lol. When I was still with exH, DD wanted a sibling so bad that at age 7 she used to tell us to go have sex and make a baby.
(Of course, I knew she knew how it all worked because I was the one that told her, but it was still funny)

ETA: my DS does NOT know yet, but he's only 14 months. We're gonna wait until he's at least in kindergarten to explain it all to him.

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