The day after giving birth

veetveet · February 2014

Gave birth to my son yesterday morning. It was quick and other than the contractions- painless physically... emotionally incredibly painful.

This morning I took a nap because obviously I can't sleep. I woke up to the sound of a baby crying- my husband was on his phone and I asked him if he was watching a video and he said he wasn't. I absolutely lost it.

And I am feeling phantom kicks.

Normal?? Or should I be checking myself in somewhere?

Bgirma · February 2014

I'm not sure if it's normal but you definitely aren't alone! I had my son almost 8 weeks ago and I heard a baby crying at random times for a few weeks. It freaked me out because I was SO sure that there was either a baby in the house or my husband was watching something on TV but that wasn't the case. At my 6 week check up my OB said that phantom kicks are normal and even non-loss moms often feel them. (This is my first pregnancy so I had no idea what to expect in terms of recovery).

Not sure if that helps but thought I'd share. I'm thinking about you and sending lots of love and positive thoughts your way. (Hugs)

veetveet · February 2014

Thanks. I am seeing my family doctor on Friday- Will definitely be bringing this up. Along with the anxiety, anger and overall- just feeling like a bag of shit.

I just told my husband I wish I had physical pain to actually distract from the mental anguish. I keep just staring off into space and just crying.

shandorfml2 · February 2014

Its all normal sweetie ((((hugs)))))

Bgirma · February 2014

I said the exact same thing to my husband a few days after having our son. I cried when I stopped bleeding and had a really hard time with losing weight quickly/having my stomach go back down. I just wanted those physical reminders of my son. It was really hard for me but seeing a counselor and talking about it helped a lot. ((Hugs))

Noethola · February 2014

***Siggy warning***

All normal sweetie. Compared to the emotional pain, the physical pain seems to be nothing. I actually got mad at my body for healing quickly and was deeply hurt when people would tell me how "great" I looked weeks after giving birth. Felt the phantom movements for months. Thinking of you.

kz's_girlygirl · February 2014

Ditto what PPs have said. I'm sorry you are struggling- know that it is completely normal and many of us here have had similar experiences. There's no easy way through any of this

Thinking of you and hoping for rest, comfort and peace

angelsnight · February 2014

Ticker warning

I felt phantom kicks for several months after delivering my angel, completely normal, but it really does mess with your head and heart. Hugs!

VyD81 · February 2014

I felt phantom kicks for a while and had a really hard time sleeping, I would wake up smelling baby powder. My dr prescribed ambien and it helped me the first few weeks. Check with your dr to see if you can get some to help you sleep and rest.

Hugs, you're not crazy, unfortunately just going through the emotions of grief. Be gentle with yourself.

Maybe Joleisa · February 2014

Like PP's have said: totally normal. The phantom kicks are like an extra knife to the heart. The first 2 weeks I could not sleep more than 3 hours at night and could not nap during the day. Week 3 I am now sleeping 9-11 hours at night, dragging myself out of bed and taking afternoon naps for 3-4 hours. I can also stare at the paint on the walls and be perfectly content. Grief is definitely a process--let yourself be and feel however YOU need. ((Hugs))

princezjk · February 2014

****Sig Warning****

I am so sorry. Everything you are feeling is completely normal. Sending you so many ((((hugs))))

jess123456 · February 2014

Big hugs. This is all normal. Like others have said, it is definitely a process and while things are so raw right now I promise you that although things will never be the same somehow you learn to live with your new normal. We are here for you.

Mrodriguez898 · February 2014

I am so sorry! What you are feeling is totally normal. I felt phantom kicks up until two weeks after the fact.
I wish you and everyone here didn't have to go through this.
(Hugs)

SchoolPsychSteph · February 2014

Maybe Joleisa said:
Like PP's have said: totally normal. The phantom kicks are like an extra knife to the heart. The first 2 weeks I could not sleep more than 3 hours at night and could not nap during the day. Week 3 I am now sleeping 9-11 hours at night, dragging myself out of bed and taking afternoon naps for 3-4 hours. I can also stare at the paint on the walls and be perfectly content. Grief is definitely a process--let yourself be and feel however YOU need. ((Hugs))

This.

ikrystal · February 2014

Ditto. I felt phantom kicks, and even though I know my twins are gone I still grab my stomach every once in awhile to support it when I go down the stairs, walk far, etc. So sorry for your loss - know you are not alone

neptunebljc · February 2014

Good Luck with the checkup. Maybe ask for something to help you sleep. After I loss my Bean, I had a really hard time sleeping, I heard babys crying, children talking. I felt VERY crazy. My doctor said it was possibly from the exhaustion. He prescribed some sleeping meds and it helped a ton. It helped me feel a little more present during the day.

mingaling2 · February 2014

It's all incredibly scary and painful, yet normal. Please be gentle with yourself. ((hugs))

cawettig · February 2014

I had phantom kicks for a long time also. I also started hallucinating after the mental trauma and not sleeping at all. I went to an urgent care and the dr gave me Ativan to take as needed. It barely helped but took the edge off. Seeing a counselor helped me greatly.

lrichmond86 · February 2014

I'm so sorry for your loss. What you're experiencing is totally normal. I had phantom kicks until I got pregnant again. It's terrible. I also recommend finding a good counselor. Talking through things helped me so much.

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