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May 2014 Moms
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MIL Shower Botherment

brittcraw75brittcraw75 member
in May 2014 Moms
My best friend contacted me earlier this week asking when I'd like to have my shower in this area. We worked out some potential dates and that was that. It made me feel a warm-fuzzy because I know this particular friend HATES planning parties.

A couple days later, my warm-fuzzy was robbed when DH told me his mom had contacted Friend to ask her about planning the shower. Eh, ok. I can deal with the loss of a warm-fuzzy feeling. But the more I've thought about this, the more it bothers me.

My friend is a sweet friend who wants to throw me a baby shower. She's a busy lady and not a party planner, so being asked was probably a good thing in her mind. What's bugging me is that I think MIL (with loving, good intentions) mentioned it to her, and is now stepping back to let Friend handle it alone.

I don't think it's fair to Friend for anyone expect her to handle the planning and paying for the shower alone, but as far as I know, no one has offered help. I told DH as much, and suggested that maybe his mom could help Friend out with it. I have other friends and family that would be more than willing, but none of them live near here. I will offer to help her, but that will be in vain, because I know she won't let me, even though I truly wouldn't mind.

I don't know what advice I came here for...Maybe I just needed to get that off my chest. It's not the worst kind of problem, I know, but it just kind of gets under my skin that she was put on the spot and is now being expected to shoulder it alone. Uncouth, IMO. C'est la vie :)
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Re: MIL Shower Botherment

  • chillypenguinchillypenguin member
    Did your friend offer to throw you a shower initially? She might not mind planning it by herself, although I don't know how big of a shower it is going to be. I offered to throw my best friend a shower, started planning it, and then her friend (who I have never met) wants to help. It's been annoying for me, I honestly would rather plan it alone, it's been a huge pain to coordinate with this girl that I don't even know. I know she was just trying to be nice, but now I feel like I have to get her approval for everything I am planning. Maybe ask your friend if she would want your MIL or someone else to help her out with the planning?
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  • brittcraw75brittcraw75 member
    She offered to throw it after MIL asked her about it. She doesn't mind, I'm sure, I just don't want her to feel any undue stress by trying to do it alone. I just don't find it appropriate to ask someone to do something like that if you don't intend to help. It's bothering me more than it should, I know.

    Good idea :) I'll ask her. Thanks!!
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  • chillypenguinchillypenguin member
    Oh, I see.. I misunderstood. Yeah, that would really bother me too! I agree that if your MIL approached her about it, she should at least offer to help!
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