About to go through a medical miscarriage :( Scared & emotional

JenLyn27 · February 2014

I would be 9 weeks today but on Saturday my Doctor's office told me to go to the ER for spotting and cramping and my fears were realized, I had miscarried. My 1st U/S was at 6 weeks, the embryo was measuring great and I even saw the heartbeat (106BPM) but the U/S at the ER showed the embryo had not developed past 6 weeks and there was no heartbeat of course I wasn't happy about it but the reality didn't set in right away and to make matters worse my husband was a total jerk. I know it affected him but when the ER Doc told me I had to follow up with my OB on Monday my husband snapped and yelled "We'll you'll have to go alone!" I told him he would have to take off and he was like "I can't take off!" So I began to cry even more and he said "I guess I'll take a sick day." We have a healthy and beautiful almost 3 year old daughter and no one to watch her, his parents never help out and my family is 600 miles away, so on top of dealing with a miscarriage I had to deal with him being a jerk. I feel like I have no one to help me through this and it's making it worse.

Tonight I take the medication to speed up the miscarriage and even though my husband is off work today and tomorrow I just feel like I'd rather be alone because I know he's going to do or say something to upset me again. My family is furious with him over what he said to me and he's always that insensitive.

Sorry, I needed to vent about that.

I would like to know if anyone on here has had a medical miscarriage? I really want to avoid a D&C if possible.

PS From the time I found out I was pregnant I knew something was wrong but my husband kept telling me to be positive that it was just my anxiety so I guess that prepared me a little but he didn't have to lash out at me the way he did.

This is off topic but can someone tell me how to use a ticker on this site, every code I have used does not work.

sonjaleake · February 2014

I found out Friday that my baby didn't make it past 7w 6d, and should have been 11w 1d. It's so heartbreaking, I'm so sorry you're going through this too. I'm also sorry your husband hasn't been as supportive and helpful as you deserve right now. I had a d&c on Monday because we were told that using the drugs and miscarrying on my own may not flush everything out, and I honestly just wanted to be down with the pregnancy if baby was already gone. So I'm sorry but I don't have experience with the drugs. Again, I'm sorry you're going through all of that, best wishes.

JenLyn27 · February 2014

Thank you. I was going to opt for a D&C but I hate surgery and thought I would give a medical miscarriage a try although I may need a D&C anyway, I hope not.

sonjaleake · February 2014

Fortunately it's not a major surgery, and I went home about half an hour after they did the procedure (you'll need a driver). And they shot me up with some great drugs that made me high as a kite, so pain was minimal. Also, rather than just forcing the uterus open, they inserted something early in the day to make everything easier. Bleeding has been super minimal, and I've only been cramping today, so just something more to consider.

JenLyn27 · February 2014

You don't make the procedure sound as scary as it seems but hopefully I'll just have to go through the medical miscarriage and be done with it because I just want it to be over, I don't want another round of medication or a D&C because the medication didn't work. I just want it over now, it's too much to deal with.

sonjaleake · February 2014

Agreed, the quicker to move past this part the better. :-/

JerseyHopeful · February 2014

I was planning a D&C when I started naturally miscarrying. I opted to take te meds to speed it up and think it was a good choice. I took the meds last Friday and was crampy and passed a decent amount that day. I used pads all well weekend but only really needed them Friday and maybe Saturday. Monday I had a check up and the doctor saw some old blood still on the scan and said I might bleed another week but by Tuesday it was super light brown spotting and mostly when I went to the bathroom.

MaBe · February 2014

I went through a medical miscarriage about 2 1/2 weeks ago. I'll be honest, it was unpleasant. Not incredibly painful, but lots of cramps and contraction feelings. I don't know if you want all the graphic details or not. After I took the medicine (vaginally) at about 10am the cramping started about an hour or so later. Bleeding started around that time too. I passed the majority of it by 1pm. Lots of large clots and some tissue, it was pretty graphic for me to see. I took some stronger Ibuprofen and that helped a lot with the cramps.

After I passed the majority, I felt much better. The cramping lessened considerably. I bled for about a week or so, but nothing unmanageable. I did keep baby wipes in the bathroom as it really helped with clean up.

I had an ultrasound a few days later and my nurse informed me that I had passed all the products of conception. So no D&C was needed. She did say my lining was still a little thick so I would bleed for a while longer and my next period might be heavier.

We were nervous about the cost of the D&C, so I am glad it worked this way for us.

JenLyn27 · February 2014

I see my Doctor tomorrow, I took a lower dose than most women are normally prescribed so I hope it worked. I did have nausea for awhile, then cramping intensified and I started passing clots so hopefully I passed everything because I really don't want a D&C.

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