Trouble TTC

Torture Tuesday (Throat Punch and Pregnant Nail lady Mentioned)

Well, I realize I should post this on Throat Punch Thursday, but couldn't help myself.  I had BETA today for IUI #3.  I already knew that it was BFN.  I tortured myself in asking my nurse what my "number" was : <1.  Obviously not even borderline kinda pregnant.  Wishing to be "kinda pregnant" at least.  All day at work I was FINE.  I feel numb at this point.  Already met with RE about IVF #1.  Picked up BIRTH CONTROL (WTF?) after my BFN call from nurse.  Still feeling FINE. (First IUI cried my eyeballs out while getting the call right before getting on an airplane - talk about a red flag for TSA security - Second IUI never had BETA due to hemorrhagic period)

Decided to get my nails done after work - that will make me feel better.  Right?  Always nice to have a hand massage.  Soooooo, I went to my favorite place and of aaaalllllllll the girls in there - the largely pregnant one did my nails.  I tried not to talk to her but she kept pressing me about her pregnancy and if I had kids.  "Why you no have kids? You so old!"  I literally was bawling in the nail salon and couldn't even wipe my eyes because of all the crap on my nails.  I kept trying to wipe my ugly tears on my sleeves and sweater, but it just made it more obvious.  At this point, EVERY ONE of the Vietnamese ladies were staring at me and all talking at the same time (assuming about my "episode" but really have no idea).  I don't normally wanna punch a pregnant person - but after she stated that she was pregnant with her third and "it was an accident"  - also, "too much kids (with accent)"  I lost my shit.  

Thanks for listening.  My DH wants me to take a month off because he says, "You are INSANE."  I suppose I should listen to him - but I feel like wasting a month is more insane that how I am now. 

(Sigh) - Crazy Train - Express ticket for one please - I'll take the seat in the padded room-car!  

***Siggy Warning***

Me: 35 DH: 34 
TTC since May 2012 
Unexplained Infertility
IUI#1 October 2013-  58m post wash - BFN
IUI#2 November 2013- 39m post wash - BFN
IUI#3 January 2014- 33m post wash - BFN
IVF #1 March 2014- 23R/18F/ZERO Frosties - BFN 
IVF #2 May 2014 - 17R/14F/1 frozen pea (2-8 cell 10% fragmentation day 3) BFP
Beta #1 77.7 (13dp3dt) 
Beta #2 307 (17dp3dt)
Beta #3 695 (19dp3dt)
Beta #4 2232 (23dp3dt)

1 Beautiful Baby - EDD 1/28/15

image 
 
**All Are Welcome**

Re: Torture Tuesday (Throat Punch and Pregnant Nail lady Mentioned)

  • Wow! Sounds like that lady needs some sensitivity training. What is wrong with people? And sorry your hubby said that. He's probably worried about you, but not the best choice of words. 
    Enjoy your ride on the crazy train! Be sure to enjoy a few cocktails :-)
     
    image
    TTC since 4/2012
    Started testing 5/2013: all clear, official diagnosis is "unexplained infertility"
    7/2013: first round of Clomid + TI
    8/2013: more bloodwork, low progesterone, low estradiol
    9,10,11,12/2013: TI + hcg injections 3,5,7,9DPO
    1/2014: Clomid + hcg trigger + TI
    2/2014: Clomid + hcg trigger + TI, natural cycle due to cyst
    3/2014: Clomid + hcg trigger + IUI #1
    4/2014: hcg trigger + IUI #1.2
    5,6/2014: on a mental/emotional health break
    7/2014: hcg trigger + IUI #1.3
    8/2014: first succesful IUI! (but no bfp)
    9/2014: IUI #2
    10/2014: hcg + IUI #3
    11/2014: SHG (fibroid not an issue)
    12/2014: Clomid + hcg + IUI #4
    1/2015: Clomid + hcg + Estrace + IUI #5

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  • Oh my goodness, that is horrible!! Ugh I'm so sorry you had that experience!!

    Me: 32  DH: 33  Married: March 2004

    July 2006: started TTC
    2008: HSG (normal), couple rounds of clomid through gyno
    2008 - 2010: dragging my feet out of fear and procrastination
    October 2010: first consultation with RE, dx PCOS and fibroids (DH slightly low count/motility)
    Oct. 2010 - Dec. 2012:  In DENIAL! avoided the issue because I was scared of surgery
    January 2013: returned to RE, fibroids grew significantly
    February 2013: second HSG, fibroids pushed on tubes which blocked them somewhat
    March 2013: MRI to determine what type of surgery may be necessary

    July 29, 2013: fibroids (5) removed via robotic laparascopy
    August 2013 - Nov 2013 : benched due to recent surgery

    IUI #1, Dec. 24, 2013, BFN 
    IUI #2, Jan. 25, 2014, BFN
    IUI #3, Feb. 25, 2014  BFN
    IUI #4 canceled due to lack of response to letrozole
    IUI #4.1 April 28, 2014, BFN

    May 16, 2014: wtf consult, start prepping for IVF in June and add injects for one last IUI in the meantime
    IUI #5 started letrozole and bravelle but canceled after HSG led to new diagnosis

    May 21, 2014: third HSG, tubes blocked, one at the beginning, one hydrosalpinx??
    June 11, 2014: consult, approved to move on to IVF because the hydro is not completely blocked therefore allowing fluid to move through slowly rather than backwards
    IVF #1 August 8, 2014 - 3dt of 2 embryos, BFN
    September 17, 2014 - 4th HSG, the right tube is very patent (open!!) dye went straight through this time. Weird!
    October 2, 2014 - started metformin treatment
    November 14, 2014 - blood work, brought A1C down from 5.8 to 5.5

    November 26, 2014 - RE finally back from vaca and reviewed my chart, no more IVFs for rest of calendar year
    December 1, 2014 - Right after Thanksgiving, I called a new clinic and got in right away! Plan for IVF
    December 17, 2014 - ER! 29 retrieved (!!), 16 mature, all 16 fertilized (ICSI)

    IVF #2 December 20, 2014 - 3dt of 3 embryos, BFN

    We are done with treatment unsuccessfully. :(


    PAIF/SAIF/All Welcome!

    image    image
  • I'm so sorry that someone treated you that way! People can be real jerks some times. Take care of yourself.
    ********Siggy Warning********

    Me: 25 DH: 29
    Married 9/23/2012, TTC since 3/2013
    Dx: PCOS, Anovulation/Amenorrhea
    HSG: All clear, SA: Normal 
    Oct 2013: 1st consult with RE
    Nov 2013-Dec 2013: Letrozole + Trigger + TI = BFN
    Jan 2014-May 2014: IUI#1-4: Letrozole + Trigger + Progesterone= All BFN
    Sept 2014: IVF#1: 24R/13M/11F
    Transferred 2 embryos on 9/24, 2 frosties = BFP!!
    Beta#1: 8dp5dt: 188, Beta#2: 12dp5dt: 822
    Beta#3: 15dp5dt: 1965
    1st u/s 10/13: TWINS!!
    u/s 12/23: TEAM PURPLE!!
    All Welcome! 
    image

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • People have no idea how insensitive they can be... It's so frustrating. I'm sorry about your day.
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
    Waited a long time, tried a lot of stuff, science made me a mom.
     Loss and IF veteran. Current mom of DS 5.5, DD 2, and sometimes DH 40. Due June 2021 with TWINS
  • I am so sorry, esp with the nail lady, I know exactly what u mean, esp when you're crying and they all start talking in a diff language, happened to me 2x, I'm sorry. HUGGGGGS



    image
    DH= burn vic, abn sa MFI|| ME= PCOS, Sarcoidosis, Hypohyroidism HSG-OK
    tried naturally 2011 & 2012-
    TTC with nurse practitioner 2013
    2 clomid cycles- both bfn, started seeing RE 2013 
    FEBUARY PLAN-HSG|| March Game plan-FEMARA IUI+TRIGGER 
    MARCH-BFP (beta1;104-beta2;302)-bc of hsg
    [[all welcome !!!!!!!!!!!! ]]
    image
  • Some days, pregnant people just suck. I'm sorry this happened. No one can imagine how much IF hurts if they haven't been through it.
  • That sounds miserable, I'm sorry. My H said once that I was getting OCD in a bad way, I had to explain why being concerned and on top of my treatment is not OCD and that he'd better not say that again!

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    TTC since Sept 2011, Unexplained IF
    Oct 12 - Jan 14: 3 clomid/TI cycles, 2 hysteroscopies, 2 IUIs, 1 BFP (MMC @ 12w), 2 more IUIs
    Feb 14: Gonal-f + IUI #5 = BFP! (EDD 11/4/14)
    Baby boy arrived 11/13/14!

  • Terrible! So sorry you're going through this, it's just unfair sometimes! Hubby did not pick the best choice of words, I'm familiar, mine's starting to think I've officially lost it. Hang in there, hope today is a better day. Hugs.




  • I'm so sorry! I would have asked her to please STFU and just concentrate on doing my damn nails.
    Married 8/6/2011 Me (26) DH (33) SA normal,HSG clear TTC since August 2011 7/2012 50mg Clomid+Trigger+IUI+progesterone =BFN 8/2012 100mg Clomid+estrogen+Trigger+IUI+progestrone=BFN 10/2012 100mg clomid+Gonal+Lupron+Trigger+Progestrone+IUI=BFP but ectopic.
  • I'm a day late, but I wanted to say what a b word she is!!  Sheesh. 
    Me: 34 | He: 40
    TTC since 08/2012
    DX: DOR




  • Ah @Kacelets I swear we on the same wave link... I too got my nails done on Saturday and I too had the preggo lady... on her 5th child none the less .... UGH!!!!! 

    We are in this together, girlfriend!  Jump aboard my crazy train because it's rounding the station... DH knew what he was marrying into, he may not have known that we'd have fertility issues but he certainly knew that I am obsessive and will do anything to reach a goal.  I am not quitter! lol

    Bring on the the birth control pills.... (because that doesn't' seem counter productive!)... IVF here we come! 
    Siggy Warning... loss mentioned

    Married since March 2008 -- Me- 31    DH - 30  Trying to grow our family since 2009... Diagnosed Unexplained Infertility 

    Started seeing RE Aug 2013

    Cycle #1  – IUI #1  10.31.13 - BFN

    Cycle #2 - IUI #2 cancelled – FAIL

    Cycle #3 - IUI #2 12.27.13  BFN

    Cycle #4 -  IUI #3 1.24.14  BFN

    Cycle #5 - IVF #1 with ICSI(2 3bb blasts) 3.19.14, no frosties.. BFN


    Surprise BFP on 6.10.14 ... Miscarried 7.7.14 


    Walked away from Fertility Treatments and began to look into our Foster/Adopt License in April 2014.


    Our Journey Blog...  http://salatafamilyest2008.blogspot.com/


  • I hope the crazy train has a HUGE bar-car.  Love you ladies.  Thank you ALL - you make my day. EVERY DAY.    


    ***Siggy Warning***

    Me: 35 DH: 34 
    TTC since May 2012 
    Unexplained Infertility
    IUI#1 October 2013-  58m post wash - BFN
    IUI#2 November 2013- 39m post wash - BFN
    IUI#3 January 2014- 33m post wash - BFN
    IVF #1 March 2014- 23R/18F/ZERO Frosties - BFN 
    IVF #2 May 2014 - 17R/14F/1 frozen pea (2-8 cell 10% fragmentation day 3) BFP
    Beta #1 77.7 (13dp3dt) 
    Beta #2 307 (17dp3dt)
    Beta #3 695 (19dp3dt)
    Beta #4 2232 (23dp3dt)

    1 Beautiful Baby - EDD 1/28/15

    image 
     
    **All Are Welcome**
  • Yikes. Hugs.
    Ready to take the road less traveled. 
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