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WWYD? Am I Overreacting?

Ellei03Ellei03 member
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
My son is 13 months old. I saw his grandfather (paternal) do something that made me nervous. I didn't say anything to him because I was in shock, am not comfortable around him, wasn't sure if I was just being crazy, and my SO's family is always dismissive of me anyway. So I talked to my SO about it and asked him to talk to his dad about it and to please not do it. He thinks I'm crazy and we're fighting now.

What happened is his grandfather shook him, but in play. It made me uncomfortable. I don't find it cute or funny. My son fell, was crying but had stopped when his grandpa picked him up said "Oh shake it off“ and shook him back and forth. Not violently but with the intent of play. What do you think? Am I overreacting? If I should say something how do I without just getting dismissed with "its fine “ or "we did it with our kids"? TIA

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Re: WWYD? Am I Overreacting?

  • twinkletoes3126twinkletoes3126 member
    Like others have said, it's hard to know without seeing it. With that said, my MIL shakes my son playfully and it bothers me. I have said to her several times, "Please don't shake him like that". She usually rolls her eyes, but stops. My husband sometimes thinks I'm overacting but since it makes me uncomfortable, I speak up. So my advice to you is that if it happens again, just say something.
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  • dande2129dande2129 member
    DaisyBlinks said:
    I playfully shake DS all the time. He thinks it's awesome. So, yeah. I think you're definitely overreacting. In fact, I might have to try that "shake it off" bit. I think he'd like it. 

    I know that they really drill shaken baby syndrome into you when they're teensy but you have to shake really hard to do any damage. Unless your toddler's head was violently shaking back and forth, it's not going to harm him. 
    I do the same thing with DS2.... I don't "shake" him but the motion of shaking is the same. What it does it just give him a vibrating sensation and he loves it. It also really works out my forearms, holy cow. BUT.... there are certain things that I can do that I don't feel comfortable with other people doing. I've never seen anyone else do that, but if I did, I'd probably be uncomfortable. I agree with a PP that you don't need to wait to say something. You don't have to verbally attack, but acknowledging the behavior that you don't like in the moment is far more effective than a "talking to" later.
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