Parenting after a Loss

Prenatal Peds Appointment Question from PgAL Lurker

Hello ladies! I am going to be 37 weeks tomorrow and am just now getting on the ball about meeting with a pediatrician. Being a first time mom I have no idea what to ask when I meet with him. What are some things I should be looking for and what kinds of questions should I ask? You would think I would have some sort of idea of what to expect since I am a NICU nurse, but I have never felt so clueless in my life! TIA for all of your help ladies!
BFP #1 1/7/13***EDD 9/14/13*** MC 1/17/13
~*6/24/13 hCG #1-112 @ 13DPO, Progesterone-21.75*~
~*6/26/13 hCG #2-238 @ 15DPO, Progesterone-28.15*~
~*6/28/13 hCG #3-566 @ 17DPO*~
BFP #2 6/21/13***EDD 3/4/14*** Arrived 2/19/14***Team BLUE

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Re: Prenatal Peds Appointment Question from PgAL Lurker

  • Thank you so much for your help ladies! The doctor I just called was recommended by my OB and one of my coworkers. A former coworker who is also a friend has been working for him for a little while now and seems to really like him. That was one of the reasons I called to set up an appointment with him. 

    Thanks for the question ideas! It may be the sleep deprivation from working last night that has me feeling so scatterbrained, but I have been feeling so clueless on this topic. You have made me feel so much better about it! 
    BFP #1 1/7/13***EDD 9/14/13*** MC 1/17/13
    ~*6/24/13 hCG #1-112 @ 13DPO, Progesterone-21.75*~
    ~*6/26/13 hCG #2-238 @ 15DPO, Progesterone-28.15*~
    ~*6/28/13 hCG #3-566 @ 17DPO*~
    BFP #2 6/21/13***EDD 3/4/14*** Arrived 2/19/14***Team BLUE

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  • Mostly you want somewhere that is convenient to get to (lots of visits in those early days) and a doctor you gel with. Those are the important things.

    Mine allows us to send questions via email and she will respond, that is handy also. But I'd still like her if she didn't do that.
    **Warning: Losses and living child mentioned**
    BFP#1 1/31/12, EDD 10/6/12 Harrison Gray born sleeping @ 18w6d. You changed our lives little guy.
    BFP#2 EDD 10/29/13, C/P 2/25/13, Bye little Ish, we barely got to know you.
    BFP#3 EDD 12/21/13, Baby Boots born 11/23/13 My rainbow baby!
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    January PAL Siggy Challenge: Good Advice
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  • We love the 24 hr, 365 days per year on call/advice service. We always seem to need health advice outside of regular business hours. I asked about how she helps first time parents who don't always agree on health-related parenting styles to understand her opinion and come to decisions. How open are they to any potential parenting styles you want to try? Where did they complete their training? Are there any American Academy of Pediatrics recommendations that she goes against and why? (Very sorry for lack of paragraphs.)
    TTC #1 since January 2011
    BFP#1 April 12, 2011, EDD December 24, 2011, strong heart beat at 7w3d, d&c at 10w6d
    BFP#2 Oct 24, 2011, natural miscarriage, EDD unknown
    After RPL testing my losses and subsequent infertility are considered unexplained.
    Cycle #22: Femara, TI, and progesterone = BFP!! 
    BFP#3 Dec 21, 2012. Beta #1 @14dpo = 134, progesterone 67.8. Beta #2 @ 17dpo = 664! Team green, EDD 9/1/13, healthy baby boy born 9/12/13!
    imageimage  My chart.


    Congratulations to the fabulous KGS2003! Her sweet boys are here! Grow boys grow!!!
  • I didn't interview anyone. I picked the closest office to his daycare facility and went by feel after that. I don't necessarily think you need to interview a pedi, but then again I don't take any parenting adivce or BFing advice from mine. I told her I wasn't interested in it and she hasn't said anything since. I use a specialist for all things except vaccines and well visits so as long as I don' think they are BSC, I don't see an issue.

    Me: 37 DH: 40 TTC since 9/09
    #1 BFP 1/10/11; missed m/c discovered 7w5d
    IF Dx: Endo, hetero MTHFR mutation, poor morphology
    #1 IUI: 1/18/12 = BFN
    #1 IVF/ICSI 4/2/12 = 2 x 7-cell and 1 x 5-cell transferred (3dt) = BFP!!
    H was born at 41w2d on 12/29/12 - be still my heart!
    #2 IVF/ICSI 1/19/14 = 2 x 8 cells transferred (3dt) = BFP!! EDD 10/09/14
    M&W born at 37 weeks on 9/18/14 - I am the momma of 3 boys!!!

      Image and video hosting by TinyPicImage and video hosting by TinyPicImage and video hosting by TinyPic
  • Vaccination schedule.
    Infant/Older kid specific times.
    Sick/No sick waiting areas.
    Late arrival policy.
    After hours/weekend line.
    ER protocols.
    BF'ing support.
    How long is a typical wait for appts/to be seen.
    My Chart

    My Life

    BFP 7.7.09 - CVS 9.10.09 (Girl) - 9.24.09 Severe Fatal Malformation - D&E 10.7.09 @ 17wks
    BFP 6.1.10 - 6.10.10 Ectopic M/C @ 5wks
    BFP 10.26.10 - 10.29.10 CP
    BFP 1.30.11 - CVS 3.28.11 (Girl) - EDD 10.11.11 - Born 10.6.11
    BFP 12.18.12 - 12.20.12 CP
    BFP 3.18.13 - CVS 5.21.13 (Girl) - EDD 12.2.13 - Born 11.24.13
    BFP 6.10.14 - CVS 7.2.14 (Girl) - EDD 1.12.15 - Born sleeping 8.6.14 @ 17w5d
  • Thank you all so much for your input and advice! The appointment went great and I think we have a winner! The only down side is I might giggle a little too much when I first see him each time because he looks exactly like Chevy Chase. Haha


    BFP #1 1/7/13***EDD 9/14/13*** MC 1/17/13
    ~*6/24/13 hCG #1-112 @ 13DPO, Progesterone-21.75*~
    ~*6/26/13 hCG #2-238 @ 15DPO, Progesterone-28.15*~
    ~*6/28/13 hCG #3-566 @ 17DPO*~
    BFP #2 6/21/13***EDD 3/4/14*** Arrived 2/19/14***Team BLUE

    image
  • If it makes you feel better, we never even talked to our pedi before A was born. She was early, and finding a pedi was on the to do list that didn't quite get done. She was a rec from my OB. H actually called her from the hospital when I was in labor just to make sure she was taking new patients.

    Turns out we love her for the following reasons: she's 2 min from our house, has taken us on same day appts several times, has Saturday hours, presents us options on things like vaccines, takes a ton of time to explain everything in ways that are really easy to understand, and she's pretty cautious about anything that seems less than perfect. We're very happy.

    I don't necessarily recommend doing it the way we did, but just wanted to reassure you that it can work!
    BFP #1 - Mango - 6/11/12, EDD 2/22/12 Natural MC 7/15/12
    BFP #2 - Nacho - 10/14/12, EDD 6/20/13, MMC 8 weeks, D&C 11/16/12
    All testing shows both H and I are perfectly normal. Baby Nacho had triploidy. 
    Back to normal business December 2012
    BFP #3 - Froggy - 1/15/13, EDD 9/27/13 TEAM GREEN
    It's a girl! Alice - Born 9/20/13, 8lbs 2oz

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  • I procrastinated as long as possible on this one. Suddenly, BOOM, I had a baby and no doctor's name to put on the form they handed me after delivery. FAIL.

    1. You WILL want a doctor at 4am. Make sure there is someone you can call and get a quick answer from. When you call ours, you even have two options:1) I want a call back within 20minutes 2) I want a call back within 2 hours

    2. Make sure they have two waiting rooms. You don't want your newborn waiting for a check-up next to the kid with hand, foot and mouth.

    3. Check to see if they have extended hours/Saturday hours.

    4. Your doctor isn't on call all the time, During those days, who would you see if your child is sick. Bonus points if you have a "secondary Primary physician".

    5. When your child is sick or sent home from school, how quickly can they get them in?

    One thing I REALLY like about our doctor is the fact that she treats my son as the patient and not me. When she is in the exam room, she talks to both of us. Even as a newborn, she would communicate with him about what she was doing.

    I also really like that we were given a book and expected to bring it to every appointment. The book contains a mini-version of his medical records as well as a SUPER handy review of all things medical that you never knew you didn't know until 4am with a sick baby.

    BPF 1. Baby Girl "Petri" 12/22/11 Said goodbye 12/27/11

    BPF 2. Baby Boy "Roo" 1/20/12 Heartbeat 160b/m 2/15/12 Said goodbye 2/20/12

    BPF 3. Rainbow Baby Boy "Creed"  4/28/12 Born healthy and alive 1/5/13

    BFP 4. "Rainbow 2.0" 8/17/14 due 4/28/15

     

    "Darling don't be afraid. I have loved you a thousand years. I love you a thousand more."

     

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  • One more. For the first 6 months or so, make sure you attend the appointments. Dad can come too but you need to be there. I was surprised at how much post-partum, feeding and post-partum depression help I got there. I even had to do paperwork each time regarding how I was coping. As a PaL mom, that help was needed more than I had anticipated.

    BPF 1. Baby Girl "Petri" 12/22/11 Said goodbye 12/27/11

    BPF 2. Baby Boy "Roo" 1/20/12 Heartbeat 160b/m 2/15/12 Said goodbye 2/20/12

    BPF 3. Rainbow Baby Boy "Creed"  4/28/12 Born healthy and alive 1/5/13

    BFP 4. "Rainbow 2.0" 8/17/14 due 4/28/15

     

    "Darling don't be afraid. I have loved you a thousand years. I love you a thousand more."

     

    imageimageimage

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

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