sleep — The Bump
Attachment Parenting


As much as I dont want to force any type of sleep training upon my ds, I am starting to worry that his quanity and quality of sleep is not at its prime... does anyone have any experience (positive or negitve) with jay gordons method or that in the happiest baby on the block guide to sleep book? Or any votes that I just wait it out and assume hes getting what he needs, sleep wise, because he is happy and meeting milestones? Or any other gentle ideas for helping my lil guy get the kind of sleep he needs for his growing body and brain? Thanks

(Brief baseline - nurse to sleep around 730 and transfer to crib, up by 10 or 11 then nurse to sleep in my bed, cosleep and nurse 3-5 times on average, up for the day between 6&8)

Re: sleep

  • The timeline you gave is totally normal. The way to gauge his sleep is to see whether he's a happy baby when he's awake, or a fussy, miserable, and sleepy guy. ;)

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    This is a great book written by an MD that explains normal human sleep patterns at different stages. He shares what normal expectations should be and also what might raise some concerns. Helpful, informative read, that I would recommend to any mama before sleep training:
  • great !! thanks for the link... 

    he is a happy guy and his sleep does add up to the "normal" range (which is huge, as you mentioned) ... I guess I have just been starting to worry that the broken up nature of his sleep is a problem... but basically just because everyone I know IRL seems to have babies that have slept 10-12 hours straight since 5 months and is telling me "stop night nursing, he isnt hungry" - i have several witty comebacks, and have resisted the urge to hit anyone (lol), but it is starting to weigh on me...... i dont want to compare one baby to another, but do want to be sure my guy gets what he needs... 
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  • If he wakes at night and wants to nurse, he likely IS hungry and DOES need it. :) Night nursing accounts for a lot of calories and fat, and breastmilk is metabolized very quickly, so it's normal for babies to wake often to fill up during the night. Even more when they're growing, hitting milestones, teething, or sick!

    Basically, if you're comfortable, you can let your baby take the lead and establish his own "normal", and that should keep him happy and healthy. :)
  • How old is he?

    I agree that you follow the baby, not the books.  My kids have NEVER slept 10-12 hour stretches (my 5 year old doesn't wake me at night but he doesn't sleep 10 hours) and they have always been happy, healthy kids.  Waking to eat or needing a quick snuggle doesn't = poor quality sleep.  I mean I'm 35 and I can't tell you the last time I went all night without waking up to flip over or something - even before I had kids ;)
  • bubble520 said:

    I guess I just can't even picture what people mean when they say their baby sleeps 12 hours... lol.... its like picturing unicorns or flying pigs in my mind !! 

    More likely than not, they're either lying or the baby sleeps away in his/her own room so mom and dad miss some of baby's natural wakings.

    It is definitely NOT normal (or safe, or healthy!!!) for a baby to go that long without being fed. So trust that you're doing the healthy thing for your kiddo by following his cues.
  • My LO just turned 1 in January and we have a similar nighttime schedule.  I refuse to sleep train because I view sleeping "through the night" as a milestone that he'll achieve when he's ready.  Right after he turned 1 I started a different approach to wakings - I try to soothe him with singing, shushing, patting first then if he doesn't settle within a minute or so I pop a boob in his mouth. ;)  It's really helped!  We've gone from 4937217947454 wakeups to 2.  We have a queen mattress on the floor in his nursery so after his first wakeup we bedshare the remainder of the night. 
  • That is exactly what nights look like with my little one. He used to sleep longer stretches, only waking twice between 8 and 6. It was awesome, but it only lasted a few weeks. Now we are onto a different routine. I'd say definitely wait it out. Baby's habits are constantly changing as they grow. Things will likely get better. Then worse. Then better. etc. lol. I'm sure your son is getting the sleep he needs.

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  • I agree with a few of the pps - some kids (unfortunately) need much less sleep than others.  There is no amount of "training" that could get my kids to meet the sleep hours listed in some of those books.  It is just not realistic for them, and they are both happy and healthy.  I, on the other hand, like my sleep and miss it greatly...but I guess I will catch up some day.
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  • thanks ladies... 

    i am going to wait it out and i am thinking he falls in the "requires less sleep" camp...
    i read an article on the genetic link of sleep habits and his daddy could live on five hours a night (especially if there was a golf course waiting for him at the crack of dawn) ... 

    I am a teacher, so I will revisit things over the summer and we will make changes at that time if need be :) 
  • I followed Happiest Baby on the Block, but at some point my throat got really sore from all the "Shhh-ing" and so I switched to a white noise generator set to "ocean".  Actually it was a free app for my iphone.  That seemed to work better than even the shh-ing.
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