LGBT Parenting
KH826
member
Pregnancy Check-in
KH826
member
How is your/your spouse or SO's pregnancy going? Any updates to share? Please remind us how far along you are and what your EDD is! 
QOTW: So 2mamaz brought this up in last week's check-in, and a few folks answered, but I would like to throw it out there to all as the QOTW -- what pregnancy "rules" have you broken or do you plan to break?
Me - 30, My wife - 31 , Together for 10 yrs - Married August 2012
5 medicated IUIs w/ RE (March - July 2013) = BFN
Fresh IVF Cycle in September 2013 resulted in 18 mature eggs, 16 fertilized, 12 made it to day 5. Transfer of 2 Grade A blastocysts on 9/15/13, and 10 embryos in the freezer! *****BFP on 9/25/13 - betas: @10dp5dt = 232; @12dp5dt = 465; @15dp5dt = 1,581 *********William George born June 4, 2014*********This discussion has been closed.
Re: Pregnancy Check-in
I am 23w6d. EDD is June 3rd.
Baby is moving a TON now, which I totally love. I feel her everyday multiple times throughout the day. Yesterday she was all over the place. I haven't been sleeping well again (I mean, this is not new, but I am going through a spell of worse than normal pregnancy sleeping the last few days). Anyway, last night I was tossing and turning like crazy. I just can't seem to get comfortable, and my hips and sides have been aching when I lay on them, so I keep flipping back and forth from left side to right side and back to left side.In the middle of the night when I was tossing and turning a ton she started kicking pretty hard -- almost to tell me "Mom, please stop. I am trying to rest!" HAHA
My other new-ish issue is really dry cracked skin that resembles eczema on my legs and in between by breasts. It is itchy (my back has been itchy too a lot), and is starting to get painful. I bought cocoa butter lotion on Saturday and I have been slathering myself with it twice a day now. I am hoping it helps.
Otherwise, not too much else to report. My next appointment is in 2 weeks. It is so nice to not feel super anxious about upcoming appointments. Now that I feel baby squirming around regularly, I am much more relaxed on a daily basis.
QOTW: I have tried pretty hard not to break many rules, mainly because I was nervous enough already and didn't need any reason to add to it worrying about consequences to my rule breaking behavior. Ha! I am a tad more relaxed now, but not sure I will be more apt to break rules. Most of them aren't too hard to follow for me. I have been sleeping on my back a little bit, but not too much and mostly not intentionally. With all the flip flopping I have been doing, I will ocassionally find myself rolled to my back for a little while, but never more than an hour or so at a time. The one rule that I would really love to break at this point is the lunch meat rule (I know some people never follow this, but I gave up lunch meat when I got pregnant, so now I feel like I need to stick it out for the duration) -- I would really LOVE a big juicy sub with lots of meat in it though. Mmmmm - I think that is my current craving. I probably want it so much because I have told myself I can't have it. When not pregnant I rarely eat such things.
Me - 30, My wife - 31 , Together for 10 yrs - Married August 2012
5 medicated IUIs w/ RE (March - July 2013) = BFN
Fresh IVF Cycle in September 2013 resulted in 18 mature eggs, 16 fertilized, 12 made it to day 5. Transfer of 2 Grade A blastocysts on 9/15/13, and 10 embryos in the freezer! *****BFP on 9/25/13 - betas: @10dp5dt = 232; @12dp5dt = 465; @15dp5dt = 1,581 *********William George born June 4, 2014*********@KH826,
When I was pregnant ALL I wanted was lunchmeat! Specifically subs from Subway, but I too thought I needed to stick it out until the end with the no lunchmeat rule. There were a couple times that I went to Subway and asked them to nuke my ham before putting it on the sub. It satisfied my craving, but I got some really strange looks from the workers!
Warning: This is a LONG update, I understand if it's too much to read!
12w5d, due August 20th.
So, first off, THANK YOU all for your huge support and kindness on Friday when we learned lil'mamaz has Trisomy X. Needless to say it was a shock - and yet a relief in that the news could have been a billion times worse. Still, I've had some time to process, had a cry or two, and feel pretty good about things now, all things considered. Today is our genetic counselor appointment along with a quick portable u/s hb/growth check (gratuitous for my sanity). J is very much looking forward to learning more about our situation since she didn't get to talk to the counselor directly.
This weekend I did a ton of research and learned a lot about XXX. One thing that rang true over and over was prenatal diagnosis seems to be the key for lessening impact. This is a rare (1:1000) condition that results from the egg giving up 2 X chromosomes vs. 1 when the initial egg and sperm meet. It is random and has nothing to do with age (my egg donor was 30); it is not inherited. This is why so many are undiagnosed - there is no physical symptoms or markers (thank god for that) - so unless you're over 35 and doing a Mat21-like test, you'd never know, or if you did, it'd be usually at school age when much of the early intervention time had passed. So for this, I feel lucky.
Saturday morning before J left for work I asked her if she still loved the baby. I was being silly, but feeling scared and worried about her disappointment. She said "Are you kidding honey? I love her MORE because I know so much more about her now. She's going to be amazing." Friday night, she made a great point that helped me a lot. My next sister down, Julie, is 3 years younger than me. Growing up, I was the "smart one" and she was the "pretty one." She had learning disabilities identified in 1st grade by mean teachers who had little compassion; my parents discussed it in the car with her in the backseat, talking like she might be retarded! She remembers this conversation and I know it shaped her confidence and self-esteem from that point on. Awful for her. But - J said "Julie had learning disabilities and I'd bet her IQ is likely 10 to 15 points below yours - yet she is totally normal!" then she added, "Honey, it's like you have a little Julie in your belly." God I love that woman, as she always knows the perfect thing to say. If this is a little version of my sister, I'm 1000x more in love with her already.
So Julie popped over Saturday to pick something up and I told her about the diagnosis. Before I go on, I have to note that she is my soul-mate sister; we feel we've lived many lives together and are old souls who have known each other for eons. I think my looney-bin time would be equal if something happened to her or J. Ok -so - as I was going through the symptoms/impact of Trisomy X, and I got to the slightly lower-but-still-normal IQ, SHE offered up this, "Oh - so it's like me and you." I wasn't going to say it, but since she did, I told her what J had said. She immediately said, "Jenny! Do you know how lucky you are to know this? Imagine if mom and dad and started helping me or getting me help 0-3 years old, vs. 7! My life would have been so much easier, I just know it. I got this little lady - I will be the one who truly understands her. This is my job with her." My heart was exploding. She texted me later to remind her what it was called so she could start her research.
Next I told my mom. She has a doctorate in education and runs the student support services a a technical college here - basically the entire resource center for any student with a physical or learning disability, ESL, etc. This is her life's work. So her reaction was also great - she said "oh honey the services available, esp in Seattle, are outstanding. She will get her needs met." She went on to offer to come over and read and extra hour to her a day, help with any therapy homework, etc. Big heart to mom on that response. It was perfect.
My cup overfloweth. It takes a village and our village is rocking it out for us.
My dad is on vacation, and I've not talked to my other two sisters but I will after our appointment. My sister Meg had to go to speech therapy for many years, so I know she'll be totally understanding. And my youngest sister will be fine too - she and I were the "smart ones" (sad that we were labeled) so I'm sure she'll read up and do her homework and be supportive.
J only had one comment that made me super sad. Right at first she said "it would've been cool to have a super smart kid." My heart broke a little. J was 3rd in her class of 500, and could join Mensa. Not saying we're rocket scientists, but I was in the 'gifted' program all through school, and we picked donors who were bright, etc. because who doesn't want a super smart kid?? But then later - J said, "Maybe the 10-15 points of lower IQ will be coming off some Mensa-grade IQ to start with. We don't know." True that, we don't.
So here we are. A big piece of info to digest and we're digesting normally I think. I have my IF counselor today (great timing!) and she is also a family counselor so I expect to use her for much more than originally planned.
One odd upside - I have barely given a thought to my fears of losing this baby since finding out. It's like I've got much bigger fish to fry - instead of being all about the pregnancy, now I'm thinking about lil'mamaz and her life - a better focus than fear! Though I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little scared about her prognosis...but I'm choosing to focus on the good in it - that we know now, early, and that is the thing that will make it come out better than it would've otherwise. I've been reading about how to raise a baby's IQ in the womb so I'll be making some diet adjustments and in the 3rd tri doing additional reading, music stuff, etc. I'm going to seek more info on this - but you can raise IQ around 8 points... so that's 1/2 way!
That was long, thanks for letting me update you all. I feel like you are my family! IRL we will tell our close friends and family, but it will not be a part of our FB announcement or anything. It's nice to have a community who 'knows.'
Otherwise - m/s is truly subsiding!! I am getting a killer headache in the evenings once or twice a week, but an icepack and rest seem to take care of it. I'm craving citrus like mad so eating loads of grapefruit and lil'cutie oranges. I told J I'm going to have to peel this baby when she comes out and she might be orange like an oompa loompa! My belly is growing and is hard - I've felt that low-grade menstrual icky feeling which I think is growth/stretching happening. Nothing big, just icky. Prenatal yoga has been awesome and amazing - super grounding for me emotionally, and I can see how it's going to be a big help as I grow and get more physical discomfort. I also love the 'round the room checkin - nice to hear from other people IRL how it's going. I'm also looking forward to not being the 'least' pregnant person in the room! Yay 2nd tri!
QOTW: Thanks again for indulging me! Ok I've had a couple poached eggs. And some soft cheese (it was pasteurized). Last pregnancy, I did have a few sips of wine and expect I will at some point in this one too. Daily drinking is what causes problems, even a glass of wine here or there is nbd - but I'll likely hold off on that until after 20 weeks or so. I've been pretty religious this time - I don't want to send any signals to the universe other than "I'm all in!" J keeps telling me to take some tylenol for my headache, but icepacks help enough. For the most part the rules are easy for me too - though there are moments!
I hadn't thought much about lunch meat but now a big fat sub sounds good. Hm....
Me (43) and J (45) - same sex couple. And we don't feel 40+!
June'12 - First RE Visit
Sept. '12 - Tubes removed
Dec. '12 - Donor Egg/Donor Sperm IVF Cycle - 4 good embies!
Dec. '12 - Fresh transfer, BFP! EDD 8/29/13
Mar. '13 - Missed m/c at 16w1d, baby boy stopped growing at 15w4d
Loss due to umbilical cord clot...baby was perfect.
Jul '13 - FET#1 - c/p
Sept. '13 - FET#2 - BFN
Dec.' 2, 2013 - FET#3 with our last chance embie - BFP!!!
Dec' 26, 2013 - hb!!
EDD 8/20/14 with a baby girl!
Little S was born on 8/21/14 - 8lb, 14 oz and 20 inches long.
We live in Seattle and used SRM for our donor egg IVF cycle
@2mamazinseattle -- can we just briefly discuss what a truly awesome person you are? You and J are going to be such amazing moms. You already are! Speaking as the sibling of someone with special needs (and I am not making a comparison, b/c my brother's situation was and is a totally different ball of wax), I can say without a doubt that early intervention makes all the difference in the world. Not only for the child, but for the parents and family too. Knowing and preparing is truly half the battle. I have no doubt that lil'mamaz (and can I also just say that I LOVE that you call her that -- love, love, love!) will have every opportunity and advantage possible. It also sounds like you have an amazing support system, which is another good bit of the battle when dealing with a differently abled child in my humble opinion. Your little lady is going to be a rock star. I just can't wait to hear more as this journey progresses for all of you... reading you "talk" about this little girl and the future just makes my heart melt.
On a muchhhhhh less important note, to address your question for me about yoga... I had seriously considered taking prenatal yoga, and I even asked a coworker of mine who is a yoga instructor on the side for recommendations. She recommended a local yoga studio and teacher, and when I researched it I found out that they recently closed the location by my office that I was going to try to go to. Then I looked for a yoga studio near my house, and I only found one that I was considering, but they only had classes on week nights and they were rather late. I don't want to be getting home at 10pm (I am an old lady - I know!). I was hoping to find some place that offered Saturday classes, but I haven't found anything. I will admit that I haven't looked around much recently and that life got away from me and I put this on the back burner. Now that I am more than 1/2 way there, I feel like I don't know if starting now would be worth it. I have considered trying to do DVDs at home, but not sure that will yield the same results.
Me - 30, My wife - 31 , Together for 10 yrs - Married August 2012
5 medicated IUIs w/ RE (March - July 2013) = BFN
Fresh IVF Cycle in September 2013 resulted in 18 mature eggs, 16 fertilized, 12 made it to day 5. Transfer of 2 Grade A blastocysts on 9/15/13, and 10 embryos in the freezer! *****BFP on 9/25/13 - betas: @10dp5dt = 232; @12dp5dt = 465; @15dp5dt = 1,581 *********William George born June 4, 2014*********On the yoga - I totally have to disagree that starting now is too late! My class just about every week has a newbie in the 20-25 week range and most do it up until labor. I think it really helps the body! I go to a saturday class primarily, and found some at 4 (which I can do sometimes) and 6 (which feels too late to me in the winter, but may be ok once it's lighter!). I do think ANY yoga is better than no yoga, so check out this DVD - is it really pretty easy, and why I chose it - someone posted "I'm fat and in horrible shape but I could do this one." And it's actually very doable but you feel like you've done something - it's $20 plus you'll definitely need a yoga mat so you don't slip and fall, so that can be another $10-$20. Totally worth the investment!
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00109KNA2/ref=wms_ohs_product?ie=UTF8&psc=1
It also has a post-natal session too, which is a bonus for after baby! Anyhow PM me if you do want any help finding a good class in your area...I'm happy to do a little looking around. Even if you just go 1x a week I bet it would help, plus mine is all about poses you can do in labor, to help move the baby down, relieve pain, etc. which will be helpful when that time comes!
Just ideas! I hate hearing you're in pain this early from the sleeping stuff and want you to feel better
Me (43) and J (45) - same sex couple. And we don't feel 40+!
June'12 - First RE Visit
Sept. '12 - Tubes removed
Dec. '12 - Donor Egg/Donor Sperm IVF Cycle - 4 good embies!
Dec. '12 - Fresh transfer, BFP! EDD 8/29/13
Mar. '13 - Missed m/c at 16w1d, baby boy stopped growing at 15w4d
Loss due to umbilical cord clot...baby was perfect.
Jul '13 - FET#1 - c/p
Sept. '13 - FET#2 - BFN
Dec.' 2, 2013 - FET#3 with our last chance embie - BFP!!!
Dec' 26, 2013 - hb!!
EDD 8/20/14 with a baby girl!
Little S was born on 8/21/14 - 8lb, 14 oz and 20 inches long.
We live in Seattle and used SRM for our donor egg IVF cycle
Things are going well here. I feel pretty good --starting to get some hip and side pain, but nothing major. I'm finally virus-free and my cough is gone. I was going to start prenatal yoga this week but had a date with a friend and a fried chicken sandwich that is only available once a month. I'm sure Mr. Baby understands. Next weekend, yoga or bust! As you know, I had my anatomy scan last week and all went well; from here on out my appointments are not too exciting for a while. Next one is the 26th but I think it's short and routine -- no ultrasound. I do have to ask her about booking my gestational diabetes test, since the testing window starts between my next appointment and the one after. I should be feeling movement sometime in the next 3-4 weeks, but I haven't yet. My placenta is anterior so it may be a while.
I am calling our potential daycare provider today to ask about putting down a deposit!!! Cross all your fingers and toes that she didn't give the spot away in the last 5 days. Thanks to everyone who weighed in on my daycare thread last week!
@2MamazinSeattle forwarded me an awesome Ted talk about what babies learn in utero -- it was fascinating and I will post the link later if she doesn't beat me to it. I am particularly interested in the fact that after 7 months, when their taste buds are fully developed, they can learn to recognize different tastes as the flavors of your food makes its way into the amniotic fluid. I have heard that eating a wide variety of food in your 3rd trimester can help prevent picky eaters later on, so I am going to do my best to keep it varied! My diet is already pretty eclectic but this just makes it more fun to think about.
QOTW: I call BS on everyone who counts caffeine as a pregnancy cheat! 200 mg or less DAILY is totally OB-approved. I drink caffeinated tea every day -- well under the limit since a cup of tea is only around 60-70 mg, but still. I definitely don't consider that a cheat. Anyway, I think I posted this last week but my main cheat is raw/undercooked eggs. I love runny fried or poached eggs and I love several desserts or sauces that are made with uncooked eggs. I don't eat any of this on a regular basis, but when it comes up I generally don't worry about it. Unlike toxoplasmosis (what you could get from kitty poo) or listeria (lunchmeat), salmonella is not necessarily a huge risk to your baby. And the risk of eggs actually having salmonella is low (outbreaks in the last few years have come from cucumbers, tahini, mangoes, cantaloupe, pine nuts and papayas, none of which pregnant women are told not to eat, as well as raw chicken -- which no one in their right mind eats -- turtles, dog food, hedgehogs, and African dwarf frogs. I am not making this stuff up -- it's from the CDC). I also can't bear to eat beef medium well or well done, so generally I just don't order steak or burgers much, but when I do I order them medium. Normally I would order them medium rare but I feel guilty about that, even though there's not a huge difference. I do try to stick to restaurants where I know the meat will be high-quality and handled properly. I haven't been eating lunchmeat, which is generally OK since I don't eat a ton of it regularly anyway, but an Italian sub sounds amazing right now! And I don't eat raw stuff -- oysters, sushi, tartare, carpaccio, etc -- while pregnant.
I am pretty strictly a back sleeper so I've been worrying about it. I specifically asked my OB last week and she said it doesn't really matter until 20w, so @KLeigh1 you have nothing to worry about at this point. She told me that it would likely start getting uncomfortable to lie flat on my back, but that I should try not to do it regardless after 20w. I've been trying to train myself to sleep on my side but I'm just so much more comfortable on my back at this point. I'm thinking a pregnancy pillow might help me be more comfortable on my side and keep me from rolling over as easily.
9 IUIs = 9 BFNs
IVF October 2012: 22 eggs retrieved, 17 fertilized, 5 frozen
ET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Blighted ovum discovered at 7w5d; D&E
FET #1: 1 blast = BFP; Missed m/c discovered at 9w5d; D&E
Karyotyping: normal ~ RPL Testing: normal ~ Hysteroscopy: normal
FET #2: 1 blast transferred 10/25; BFP 10/31!
EDD 7/13/14 ~ Induced at 37w4d due to pre-eclampsia ~ Born on 6/28/14
*Everyone welcome*
It's been quite awhile since I last checked in. We are 36w4d with our twin girls. The average delivery for twins is about 35.5 weeks and although I know I should want them to stay in as long as possible, the anticipation is driving me insane! We just got an induction date scheduled for 38w2d so there is an end in sight but we are so ready now. My poor poor wife is SO uncomfortable and just started to get an intensely itchy rash over her belly that wakes her up at night (she has already had a physically rough pregnancy with SPD). It's hard to see her in so much pain
My mother in law just flew in yesterday and is staying with us for about 6 weeks. This is great in some ways as we get along very well and she is already helping around the house but is hard for me in other ways. I have to go back to work ASAP after the girls are born and I'm really struggling with that. I have fears I'm going to be really jealous and not know the details of my own babies lives and having someone besides my wife there for them is really hard for me. Also, I'm very introverted an need find it exhausting to always be around others. But even with all that, I think it's a good thing she is here and will help me relax if J needs a c section and needs extra help early on when I have to go back to work.
Sorry for the long post and worries! I have quite a bit on my mind but I really am so happy and excited to be expecting me girls in the next couple weeks
Ugh...sorry for posting so late, but have had some serious trouble with this nausea. It sucks! We are 7 weeks tomorrow. EDD is Oct 2nd now and I'm sure it will end up being in September, as most multiple pregnancies do not make it to their due date. They are the size of sweet peas right now!! I still can't quite wrap my head around it
QOTW: what pregnancy "rules" have you broken or do you plan to break? So I broke the whole "don't tell anyone until 2nd trimester--not any way I could've abided by this. Umm...I had a hot dog the other day. I didn't even check to see the temp! I felt so bad afterward. Another thing I have done, which I don't think is a rule-but my Re's request, is I have taken benadryl quite a few times. My allergies are killing me!
Married to M and proud mothers to Olivia and Elise (8/19/2014) and to our fur-babies: Capone (pitbull), Jax and Atticus (cats)