November 2013 Moms

Vent: what has been the hardest for you?

katmac17katmac17 member
edited February 2014 in November 2013 Moms
DD is a lot mellower than DS was, but I am starting to think that a truly "easy" baby does not exist. I've been sleeping a lot more than I did with DS, but for me there have been two really hard things this time around:

1) total, complete bottle refusal. It has meant that I haven't had more than the 1.5 hours between the end of one feed and start of the next to myself for her entire life, with no end in sight. And a date night with my husband? Not a chance! When I start back at work I think my husband will bring her to me for feeds when I can't pop out to feed her.

2) car screaming. If she isn't asleep in her car seat at the start if the trip, she will be screaming bloody murder the whole way there. Now that she is a bit bigger, I would love to do more outings with her and DS, but the car screaming often makes it not worth it.

I am of course so grateful for a healthy, thriving baby, and so in love. But sometimes having a little baby is darn hard, and the only thing that keeps me going is knowing how much easier it gets.

Go ahead ladies - take a moment to let us know what has been kicking your tush with this baby...

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Re: Vent: what has been the hardest for you?

  • At the moment the hardest thing for me is that LO doesn't like anyone else to hold him, I feel like I'm raising the anti social kid that I always dreaded. I have no idea what I did to create it (or maybe it's just his nature) but I'm very sad and starting to be embarrassed in social settings.
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  • Like @joelies, I've been kicking my own ass.

    Since we sorted out the reflux and allergies he's been pretty easy. We still have rough days here and there but he is generally very content now.

    I struggled so much early on, maybe the first 4 or 5 weeks trying to figure out some sort of a schedule. Once I decided to just react and roll with it I've been in a much better place.

    DS is sleeping great at night but I have trouble getting good rest. Even on nights when DH is in charge and I'm "off duty."
  • This is my second baby. He is so much easier than my first. He actually sleeps, so I totally feel for you ladies with nocturnal babes.

    I think my hardest thing right now is taking care of myself! Most days I'm in pajamas and my hair is not even brushed. I definitely feel better if I shower and get dressed...but it hardly seems to happen!

    I've also been dealing with some post partum anxiety I think. I have panic disorder to begin with, so it's hard to tell.

    But this is my last baby, and I'm trying to soak it all up. He's so incredibly sweet, and I cannot believe howuch I love this little person! Being a STM, it was hard for me to thinking be able to love someone as much as DS1. It's amazing how much love your heart can hold!!
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  • My son screams bloody murder when he is in his car seat as well, sometimes he will calm down once the car is moving fast but if I stop at a light for too long he will start back up again! It is really making me dread bringing him out!

    He also won't take good naps anywhere but in my arms! I would love to be able to get more housework done but nope! Luckily he will sleep at night in his crib!

    Things are truly starting to get much easier though! He'll be 4 months old on the 20th and he has become so expressive! His reflux is also completely under control which is such a relief!
  • My DS slept like a dream, from day one. My DD is very different. 
     
    Baby K is a fairly good baby. She is relatively mellow and not a very fussy baby. We are having a problem with sleep. We had a good rhythm until she had her 2 month shots. Ever since then she fights naps and is up every few hours throughout the night. Lately, she is harder to get down, no doubt due to her being overtired from not napping throughout the day. On a rare occasion she may get 1 hour long nap in but that is the exception. The last couple weeks have really been a sleep struggle and I have literally tried everything that has been suggested to me but nothing works. We do the same routine every night, at about the same time. I am starting to doubt myself and I feel pretty inadequate as a mother. Sleep is all I think about and nighttime sleep has gone from a pleasant way to end the day to complete anxiety about what the night will bring. 
    My days are now spent searching the internet and buying books that have been no help. I get through it knowing that this will pass and it will get better. Its just a struggle right now.


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  • My third kid loved the bouncy seat and would sit in it (and her carseat, same position) happily. I could tend to the older two easily.

    My n13-er does NOT like the bouncy seat AT ALL. This means that for me to get things done in the house, I have to either wait till he's napping (which isn't always feasible) or try putting him on a floor mat, which he isn't a suuuper fan of either. (I'm not into babywearing.)
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  • Working part-time from home.  I can't get any work done because DS decides it's time to scream when I sit down to actually get things going.  And DH hasn't been as helpful as I thought he would be about keeping DS entertained for a couple hours while I work.  I honestly think it would have been easier to just work full-time and send DS to daycare, but that's not what I wanted to do.  
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  • This is our first, so no real comparison for us to go on; but a lot of the same issues as OP.

    DS sleeps well at night (since 8 weeka old he's been sleeping 12/13 hours a night without waking) however, during the day he fights his sleeps during nap time. Nothing pleases him, I try rocking him to sleep, walking with him, trying his swing, trying the crib (where he sleeps at night perfectly), tried everything and he just eventually gives up and falls asleep, and then his naps only seem to last for like 30 minutes... I'm not sure what to do about it.

    Also, he's a DOLL for already sleeping thru the night, but when 7 o'clock hits, he doesn't play. If he's not home, in his bed time routine he is like dr. Jekyll and mr. Hyde, its crazy how fast his switch can flip too! My husband works all day, so that's rough on me and him cause he took a while to transition into daddy-hood (but thank god he took to it so well in his own time) but now that he's been getting into being daddy, he's up before DS is and home after I've put him to bed :( I don't like that at all. I want them to spend time together.

    But overall he's been a wonderful baby. He switched wonderfully from breast to bottle when i had to stop due to PPD and PPA. I'm so in love and slowly catching up on sleep, he was in the hospital for a week due to being so young and spiking a fever. Watching them run tests and do spinal taps broke my heart, but now he is healthy and home.

    I also just miss the downtime I had to do monotonous things that I took for granted, but as I said I wouldn't trade him for the world. I've never felt so much love before!!!
  • Postpartum anxiety and feeling so porky... the pounds are not coming off with breastfeeding like I thought they would. DD is so very sweet though!
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  • I think if I could get more sleep I'd really have nothing to complain about. My little 3 month old dude still gets up all throughout the night, sometimes every 2-4 hours, sometimes every frekin' hour! And not just to eat. DH won't help at all if he has work the next day. This week he isn't working so we'll see if he gives me a hand with just soothing LO when he wakes (I'm EBF ) so no bottles.
  • Little boy is finally out of the colicky phase and is now sleeping 5-7 hours straight so I can't complain there. The problem that I'm having is getting the strength to move P to his bedroom,it seems so far away. Second is the fact that I still can't fit into my pre-pregnancy clothes and I don't want to buy all new jeans. I used to eat so much healthier and now I'm lucky if I eat at all. Another thing is the lack of wanting to have sex. I used to want to but now I'm just so tired.
  • Being a "single" parent - I always thought I'd have my DH around to help out and just share this time with. I'm fine with doing the day to day things and even though it is challenging I make do. But the fact that DH never got to hold DS is unbearable, and not getting to be a family is so damn hard.

    Outside of that, my little man loves to be held and never put down, so I have to be creative in doing things around the house!
  • TJHine said:

    Being a "single" parent - I always thought I'd have my DH around to help out and just share this time with. I'm fine with doing the day to day things and even though it is challenging I make do. But the fact that DH never got to hold DS is unbearable, and not getting to be a family is so damn hard.

    Outside of that, my little man loves to be held and never put down, so I have to be creative in doing things around the house!

    Big hugs to you. I think of you often.
    Thank you, I really appreciate it!
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