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March 2014 Moms
amdecker1016
member
Open Letter Saturday?
amdecker1016
member
With the replies last saturday anyone up for this being a regular thing?
I'll start:
Dear H:
Its cute you think you don't get enough sleep when you are receiving around 8 hours a night. So when i kick you leg over because it is preventing me from falling asleep you need to deal with it.
Sincerely,
Your hormonal pregnant wife.
Dear drivers of America:
Put down the damn cell phone. Your life and everyone else's is too precious to finish that text message.
Thanks,
Concerned citizen who has seen too much heartbreak lately.
I'll start:
Dear H:
Its cute you think you don't get enough sleep when you are receiving around 8 hours a night. So when i kick you leg over because it is preventing me from falling asleep you need to deal with it.
Sincerely,
Your hormonal pregnant wife.
Dear drivers of America:
Put down the damn cell phone. Your life and everyone else's is too precious to finish that text message.
Thanks,
Concerned citizen who has seen too much heartbreak lately.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Open Letter Saturday?
It's 5 am on a Saturday, aka your day off. I know you're excited about getting started on painting the nursery today, but you need rest. You cannot be a sicky forever.
Sincerely,
Up 3 times in the night to pee.
Dear boss,
THANK YOU for being the worlds greatest, and being completely understanding about my needs throughout the last 7 months. Also, the fact that you and your wife are throwing me a goodbye party/shower is so sweet, I had to hold back happy tears.
Sincerely,
Your favorite secretary.
Dear dryer,
Please stop squeaking and making all my new baby clothes smell like burnt rubber when they first come out.
-Don't want to rewash
Dear BabysRUs,
Please take all my returns without receipts at a good price.
-Needs a few more things
I lost my job bc our practice closed when I was 7 months preggs with DD and never intended on staying home- but we budgeted and I did for two years so It was a blessing in disguise. I hope you are able to enjoy some time home with little one before you get a new job! I love working now. Once she turned two work became much less stressful than being at home ; )
Stop telling me I'm getting fat. And then laughing. I'm looking pretty sexy these days I know! But seriously stop. You smell like a carton of cigarettes and I nearly vomit each time you come in. Have some respect.
Sincerely,
The hungry hungry hippo
Screw you and the horse you rode in on!
Signed,
I wonder how you people sleep at night
Please dislodge your butt and feet from mommys ribs, it hurts like hell! Also I apologize in advance for you going through donut withdrawals after birth I blame the awesome ladies of TB and all of the pastry talk
Your loving Mommy
I have been up since 5 and really want donuts so get the f out of bed!!!
Love,
Your sleep deprived, dreaming of DD wife
I absolutely refuse to buy any more bras until after this baby is born. So stop with the expansion.
Sincerely,
Missing my c's
I love you guys and you're awesome. I love that you want to throw me a surprise shower. But seriously, two days before my due date probably isn't the best idea.
Please reconsider.
Love,
Former Fly Half
Dear students,
Would you please stop insisting on bringing in Taco Bell to represent Mexico for international day. It's just wrong.
Love,
Teacher who takes International Day too seriously
How could you put that shit in the bread?!?
- disgusted
https://globalnews.ca/news/1132389/chemical-in-subway-bread-also-in-canada-but-will-be-removed-company/
RIP Dr. Irving Fishman - 10/1/19-7/25/10 - thank you for holding on for me.
You made my wedding day complete.
Thank you so much for putting up the curtains/curtain rods in the nursery. It looks amazing and it made my day.
Love, your adoring wife
Dear H,
When your pregnant wife has been talking about how excited she is to have a weekend where we get to do nothing for once except relax, don't invite your whole family to stay two days with us for your brother's bday without asking me the day before they come. Not amused.
Love,
Your exhausted, pregnant wife!
ETA: tried to add mobile formatting... I think I failed!
I love you. It's 9am, but because of you dd is still in bed. She probably thinks it's her normal wake up time of 7:30am right now, but I actually got to sleep in!
Thanks,
Rested, but tired
Thank you for waking every hour on the hour last night. It was a good reminder of what I'm in for when your sister comes.
Please don't remind me again tonight. I got it.
Love you,
Exhausted pregnant mama
please be happy and calm today. Momma is very tired after only 4 hrs of sleep last night. You are free to tantrum and get crabby as soon as daddy comes home this afternoon.
Please stop calling me over and over again. If you actually have something important to say, leave a message. Don't call four times in a row when I'm at the doc's office and then text that you've been calling for 2 days. That won't get me to call you back. I'll just have DH call you instead, and seeing how he's as fed up with your BS as I am, you won't be happy with that phone call.
Sincerely,
DIL who no longer cares whether you like her
I really don't care if you meet the babies right after they are born. It's not my problem that you don't want to board the dogs, are afraid to fly, and can't afford a hotel. You are adults. Figure it out.
Love,
Your pregnant daughter in law who doesn't give a shit
Because of you, I now NEED a donut. I never want donuts, ever. But now a cream filled donut is all I can think about oh and some chocolate milk! Mmmmm...
My midwife would not be happy about this as I am supposed to stay away from sugar
Off to find a donut shop.....
Engaged 12-12-10 Married 5-12-12 Baby Jaxon 3-23-14
Call Me Mrs.Foster Blog
Your "MD's" need to go back to school.
Love, a very pissed off misdiagnosed pregnant woman.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Kari~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I have been talking about damn shamrock shakes for at least a month. The fact that I finally talked DH into driving me to get one and you tell me the shake machine is broken is not sitting well with me. You are lucky that there are two McDonalds in this city!
RIP Dr. Irving Fishman - 10/1/19-7/25/10 - thank you for holding on for me.
You made my wedding day complete.
Thank you for sticking to your word and going with me to pick out flooring for our boys' room! And double thank you for surprising me and installing it TODAY!
Love,
Your greatful wife
Dear DS,
Please stop screaming EVERY TIME dad turns on the table saw. You should be used to the noise by now.
Love,
Mommy with a splitting headache
Please stop throwing us curveballs that have cost us more than $5K in additional materials cost than we had planned. We only have 6 or so weeks till this baby is here and would really like to get all this done.
Sincerely,
A fed up homeowner
Dear Friends,
Thank you, thank you, thank you for giving up your weekends for the past few months to help DH and I. We appreciate you more than you know and would be lost without you.
Love and gratitude,
DH and I
Dear DH,
Thank you for putting up with my freak outs over spending more than we had alloted. I know that you want that new shot gun and I was hoping to get it for you for valentine's day, but it to going to have to wait. You deserve it for all that you do and I will make it happen as soon as I humanly can.
Love,
Frustrated and feeling broke wife
I'm truly sorry that you ate something that upset your stomach. However, contrary to what your moaning and groaning indicates, you are not going to die. I'm not certain that we needed to cancel all of our afternoon plans when you are working tomorrow and we only have a handful of weekends together pre-baby left, so that you can take a nap bc your tummy hurts. If I canceled plans every time I didn't feel well I would never do anything, much less work 50+ hrs/wk. Wake up please, so we can hang out and do what we had planned!
Love,
Your hurting, aching, uncomfortable every day wife
Please stop live blogging your pregnancy, especially if all of the posts are going to be extremely self-righteous. If a fellow pregnant woman is annoyed, I can guarantee all of your other friends are even less tolerant.
Love,
Your friend who is also super pregnant but doesn't feel the need to tell the world about every symptom and development on a daily basis
I find the fact that you basically live-Facebooked your induction and delivery today more than a little odd. Did you have your phone in your hand WHILE pushing, or did you designate someone to Facebook for you? Also odd? Your choice to post a photo of your husband holding your new baby while you are in bed, literally seconds after birth. We can barely see you but it's obvious you are being stitched up post delivery. That's weird. I want to ask you to tone down the Facebook-whoring now that your daughter is here, but I'm pretty sure it's only going to get worse. And weirder.
Sincerely,
The woman who now knows how not to announce her delivery on Facebook
Please go head down and stay there for the rest of your cozy stay that lasts at least 3 but no more than 6 weeks.
Love,
Your severely uncomfortable and scared of a c section mama
Dear DS,
Thank you for being totally awesome at swim lessons and just hanging out while I got changed. You are definitely improving your chances of getting to go back the next 3 weeks!
Love,
Your oversized mother who already has issues dressing herself without watching a 2 year old
Dear M14,
Quit talking about donuts! DH brought me home 2 on Thursday and I bought 4 more today. I'm already gaining too much weight lately and this isn't helping!
Love,
A sugar overloaded aLsMay
Dear insurance,
Thanks for being awesome only when you have large claims. Next year I will hate you but this year, since I've reached my max out of pockets in Jan, I will enjoy going to the chiro for free 59 more times this year!
Love,
Your pregnant client who is still bitter about no new breast pump but is starting to get over it
I know DH is gone and you are on full guard dog duty, but I think I will be okay going to the bathroom by myself. I promise you, that's the only place I'll be getting up to go the entire evening beside laying on the couch. And You are going to tire yourself out if you follow me there every 20 minutes.
Love,
Pregnant Peeing Owner