Social events and TTC - am I not ready?

LunaGirl28 · January 2014

Every time a fun social event comes up (a few months away) I find myself thinking "well maybe I should hold off TTC." I know that's so silly, especially when it could take years to get that BFP. I have a friend's bachelorette weekend (that's centered around my favorite thing -- WINE!) in March and am so excited but of course then I think "what if I'm pregnant?!" I can't help but feel a little bummed. Does that mean I'm not ready to have a baby or is this normal? I know that there will ALWAYS be social events and if I have this mindset, I'll never have a child. Just curious if this is something most women go through.. or if its clearly a sign I need to hold off.

Ducktale · January 2014

I don't think it's a big deal to be bummed at the thought of not being able to partake in the drinking at an event. We're going on vacation in April and we'd like to hit up a few wineries. If I'm KU I'll be disappointed to not do that. Not disappointed enough to put off TTC. Now, if this disappointment over not drinking leads you to actually put off TTC, then you're not probably ready, because that probably means there's other stuff going on you need to work through. So it depends on how MUCH these thoughts affect you.

laurakaz13 · January 2014

Shrug. I think it just means you realize you will miss fun events. I am TTC and I feel the same way about fun, wine-centered events. Heck yes I'm going to miss them. I hate that we can't drink during pregnancy.

It doesn't for one second mean I'm not ready for child #2. I consider myself a darn good mom, in fact. But yes, I do enjoy certain things in life that are not possible while pregnant. I consider pregnancy a necessary evil. Not enjoyable at all.

LunaGirl28 · January 2014

Thanks ladies -- that helps a lot. I think I go back and forth.. and that's what makes me think I might not be ready.

While we're trying right now, we're kind of just letting fate take control (though I am starting to temp -- more to know when the heck my period is coming), so we'll see. I might be crazy and not pregnant for another year or two.. so it's probably silly to even think this way.

nolanova85 · February 2014

I don't necessarily think it means you're not ready. It is possible to be both bummed about not being able to drink AND overjoyed to be pregnant. Those feelings aren't mutually exclusive. But I think it is great that you're self aware enough to put real thought into it, whatever you decide. I have thought a lot about it too. I just figure that life has to keep moving. I can't make plans or NOT make plans because of what MIGHT be. And like I said above, I'll likely be so overjoyed when I finally get the BFP that no matter what I miss out on, it will be worth it.

Wine&Cupcakes · February 2014

I don't think being hesitant about missing out on alcohol-centered events makes you not ready to TTC. One of my best friends is having a bachelorette party in Miami in August and I'm kind of bummed to think I may be pregnant at the time and won't be able to have my sacred gin & tonics.

The difference is whether you actually put off TTC for an event. I won't put off TTC for this trip. However, I also won't plan a beach/relaxation vacation either, because I know it would detract from my good time if I couldn't indulge in my pina coladas starting at 1pm. Do I think this makes me too immature to be pregnant? Nope.

You can be totally thrilled to be pregnant AND bummed out about not being able to partake in the drinking festivities. I think it's normal. However, consistently toying with the idea of putting off TTC for fleeting events (a party here, a bridal shower there, etc.) is probably an indication that you may want to wait until the idea is more palatable to you.

reddeezy · February 2014

I'm not TTC yet but will be soon. I am on the same page as you and totally bummed that i may not be able to have some drinks with my husband and girlfriends at upcoming events. I don't think this means that we aren't ready for a baby, it just means we enjoy socially drinking and hate the thought of missing out on some of the fun. I think it's totally normal, and many of my friends who have children have told me that they couldnt wait to have a nice glass of wine or a few cold beers while they were pregnant!

reddeezy · February 2014

@Kimbus22 Sorry for any confusion. I totally agree with you

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Social events and TTC - am I not ready?

Re: Social events and TTC - am I not ready?

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