May 2014 Moms

Couples Showers??

What's everyone take on a couples shower?  I was very surprised to hear a lot of my friends ask if I was having a couples shower.  I thought the boys would be bored but everyone seems down for it....im still trying to decide if id do one or not but anyone have any experience with one and if yes any suggestions on games or activities to do?

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Re: Couples Showers??

  • I've been to them before and I think they are fun! But my DH is not interested at all. So his friends are doing the diaper party for him.
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  • My MIL is throwing a shower and guys are invited. They generally just hang out outside, drink beer, and bs. The ladies do the shower stuff. Bc it's mostly family and close friends, everyone knows each other. It's NBD in our area with our crowd.
  • I think it depends on what your husband thinks. I asked mine if he was at all interested, and he said no, which is fine with me. The one couples shower that I've been to ended up with the guys being bored and drinking in the back yard while the girls stayed inside and did the traditional shower stuff. 

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  • I have never been to one but I think they could be fun. DH isn't interested in being part of the shower, so we are not doing one.

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  • I have been to some that have been really fun, but they were more casual and not a "typcial" baby shower.

    Personally, DH wasn't into it, so I am having a more traditional shower.
  • I hosted a friends shower. Her mother did a triditional ladies for family then i did a smaller BBQ type for friends. Most of the friends don't have kids yet so it was fun get together burgers and beer celebrate the baby type thing. We did a diaper raffle thing (every box of diapers gave you a chance to win a cool prize) mom-to-be loved it. She had enough diapers for a long time.
  • We just did a cookout...so I guess it was a couple's shower. We didn't do games though. It was nice...more of a family / friend get together.
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  • My friend is throwing a couples BBQ shower for us. We'll have a diaper cake, beer cake, and some awesome Texas BBQ. I'm not sure on the other details, but I'm excited and all the guys seem to be as well.
  • My MIL is throwing a shower and guys are invited. They generally just hang out outside, drink beer, and bs. The ladies do the shower stuff. Bc it's mostly family and close friends, everyone knows each other. It's NBD in our area with our crowd.
    This is how my in-laws do showers as well, wedding and baby.
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  • My brother and his wife had one and it was really fun. I also had a friend who did one and hers turned out well. I think it depends on the man, the people attending, etc.
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  • My husband hates them.  He is only coming to the end of mine to say hi and help carry stuff.  
  • I have helped host two showers where guys were invited. I wouldn't really call them "couples showers", there were many guests, both male and female, who came by themselves.  

    My personal suggestion is skip the games and serve good food and beer. Just make it a regular party with a break at some point to open presents. 
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  • My DH's cousins both had couples showers and I thought they were fun but my DH and his brothers were SO not interested.

    I mean it was just a regular party with gifts for the baby. It wasn't like the men were all playing games or anything but they didn't like the opening presents part when all the women were gushing over how cute things were.

    I feel like they are becoming more commonplace now.
  • First of all when I read the title all I could think of was if both of you can fit in the shower still go for it! I miss the occasional coed shower ...lol
    However we are having some guys at our baby shower. Honey has a few close friends that spend a lot of time here at the house and I also know my nephew (he's 21 and has 3 kids ) will be there so I told my best friend that I expected them to want to be at the shower .. she still thinks it's weird.. I just think that honey will be more comfortable with his friends there ..
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  • When i mentioned to my husband that people have co-ed showers he looked horrified. not his cup of tea, at all.

    in our circles of friends and family, showers are usually the traditional kind, with ladies sitting around eating and drinking and watching gifts be opened.

    i'm sure his friends will take him out to get him drunk at some point to celebrate, but among the people i know a co-ed shower would get side-eyes from both sides.   


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  • I think they make a lot of sense if you and DH have a lot of common friends. If you have 2 totally separate groups of friends, however, I don't see the point.
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  • We just got invite to one.  MH asked if he had to go because showers are for girls.  I tend to agree.  I guess I am just old fashion like that.

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  • Oh, and yes, he has to go.

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  • My mom is hosting my shower and it's ladies only.  DH and my stepkids might possibly be there, depending on how I am feeling on driving, but they will be out of the house with my stepdad during the shower.  If DH doesn't come, my stepdad has already said he plans on locking himself in the basement -- he has no interest in hanging out with us, lol.

    If DH's family throws a shower for me (unlikely) he will be there, whether other boys are or not, simply because I don't think I can hold my tongue without him there to remind me to be nice. But also, his family tends to do everything as a "family event", so it's always co-ed.
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  • yogasailmommayogasailmomma member
    edited February 2014
    I threw one many years ago for my best friends. It was more of a party then a shower, we had about 75 people and cooked hot dogs and had a keg. The guys didn't participate in the opening of gifts but the ladies did and everyone had a blast. I would say skip the games and it's a win win for everyone ;-)

    Edited because I hit send to soon
  • I like the ladies only kind personally and thats what I am having. We go to and have parties all the time the shower should be something a little different. My DH will probably go out with my brother and dad somewhere during and come by at the end to load gifts. I want my sister in law to register as well she has two young children I think it was much more helpful than dragging along my DH
  • I meant I went with my sister in law to register:)
  • I would probably enjoy my shower more if my H was there. And I know he would have fun. Or at least pretend to. This sounds silly but we are basically each others best friends and really prefer to do everything as a couple. (We are also newly wed so I'm sure that will change over time) . I think coed showers would be more fun Imo.

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  • Also adding...our family is several hours away, so that played a large part in our decision. If I got to see family I didn't want DH to miss out and I didn't want to not see my male relatives if we drove in that far.
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  • ShanJohnNCShanJohnNC member
    edited February 2014
    I don't know what games are being planned for mine (if any) but the ones I'm traveling to NC for my boyfriend was a little upset that I was thinking about NOT including him. I kinda got a sad face - LOL!! Oh yeah - AND he gets to meet some of the crazy family friends that he's never met before so he'll have a face with a name when I speak about them later...

    That being said, he'll be in tow!!
  • The idea of them used to make me all pearl-clutchy (just because they're not traditional) but I've changed my mind as I've watched more of my male friends become dads. I feel like anything that makes parenting more of a "joint" experience and less of a "mom's" experience is a positive thing in general for society and families and children.
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  • My SILs shower was co-ed but nothing about it said baby shower except for the centerpieces I made and the pile of gifts in the corner.  There was nothing overtly "shower-like" about it- no forced games or anything.  Just a BBQ/buffet.  When it was time to open gifts we set up chairs on a separate patio and invited anyone interested in watching the gift opening to join us.  Of course, it was the women and the men manned the grill and cooler while we were gone.
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  • We're having a couples BBQ shower later this month in DH's hometown (4 hours away). My DH has so many friends that it was the best idea. We didn't want them to be left out. DH was definitely against it until I told him all his buddies could be invited...he warmed up quickly to the idea.

    I imagine it'll be like what everyone else has mentioned - ladies inside and men outside. I hope the weather cooperates!!
  • My BFF is throwing me a co-ed baby shower.  I really think that this is the time for BOTH of us to enjoy the pregnancy and the LO that will arrive soon.  I've been to two co-ed showers and they were pretty fun and mellow, games were played but there were games that both guys and girls could enjoy.  Like guess how big mama's belly is using a string or blind folded and try to find as many safety pins in a bowl of uncooked rice in an amount of time and prizes were given out. 

    I know my baby shower will be more like a party than a shower.  I hope to have some fun games as well, that involve who can drink 2 ounces of beer out of a baby bottle fastest.  There will be food and beer and lunch served.  I really don't want it to be all females, I was never very girly and my bridal shower was not my scene. 
  • We are having a party. I think my SIL and MIL were a little disappointed when I mentioned I didn't want all women/pink anything/games/focus to be on me, but that's ok. My sister is throwing it and she does loads of coed "showers" every year (party planner). I am excited, and I think h and his buddies are too. What's not to like about a party? ;)
  • I've been to a coed shower a few years ago, and it was pretty cool. Beer to be had by all not preggo! That's what we will be doing in a bit. BBQ, beer, and poker. It will be awesome!
  • It's funny that when I posted a very similar question on the Baby Bump app, everyone said they were having a coed shower and I felt weird for only wanting women. My husband didn't seem interested in being at a shower. I think it would be awkward if we start talking about childbirth, etc.
  • For DS1, we had a co-ed shower that was pretty much a BBQ, especially since it was the day before 4th of July and there were fireworks, etc. We loved it. 
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  • Thank you so much ladies for lots of input. You all gave me lots to think about.... I talked to my fiancé to see what he thought and surprisingly he was all for it. He said we have such a great group of friends so he thinks it will be more of a celebration which makes sense....thanks again ladies :)

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  • We are having a co-ed at a local golf course restaurant...my hostess is planning on having some appetizers catered and it's going to be a "drop by" atmosphere where they can grab a bite,say hi, be thanked for their gift and go on with their evening. Sounds good to me! I would appreciate a laid back atmosphere when attending a shower.
  • She is also going to enter guests in a drawing for a gift card if they bring a pack of diapers or a children's book.
  • Beegirl99 said:

    It's funny that when I posted a very similar question on the Baby Bump app, everyone said they were having a coed shower and I felt weird for only wanting women. My husband didn't seem interested in being at a shower. I think it would be awkward if we start talking about childbirth, etc.


    Ugh- I hate that app! It seems to be all teen moms and crays. I stick to TB because we at least weed out our crays...and our ladies are awesome.
  • I actually wish we were having a co-ed shower since I'm a little anxious about the focus being on me the whole time.  My mom, however, was set on throwing me a shower and I definitely didn't want to ask her to foot the bill for more than double the people.  I'm just glad my best friend will be there so I don't feel as awkward (I never had a bridal shower so I'm not sure what to expect).  
  • Linky: co-ed showers in the news!  Thought it was funny cause we were just talking about this!

    https://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2014/02/05/co_ed_baby_showers_no.html?wpisrc=hpsponsoredd2
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