Defending BF

LisaLisa1980 · January 2014

Someone just asked me if I was still nursing my son (actually, they ask me all the time.) I asked them back why they keep asking if I'm breastfeeding to which they replied "because you know you can stop whenever."

I just told them to pls stop questioning me and that I planned on doing it for a year. But I'm so irritated because it's no ones business. I don't get it?!

Pitterpatter44 · January 2014

I've been asked maybe twice about this since LO was born. But I assume people are either trying to relate to you from their own experience or are insecure about their own choices. Either way, I wouldn't worry so much about it unless someone actually starts to lecture you about it.

carrotcake06 · January 2014

Ever since I got pg w my first, complete strangers have somehow made it their business to ask me very personal questions.

If my kids were planned, how they exited my body, if I breastfeed, if the twins were spontaneous, how much I sleep, when I eat, how full my hands must be.

If I let it bother me, I'd be a very angry person.

AprilloMom · January 2014

Nicb13 said:

What exactly is the problem? Sounds like you have it handled.

Obviously the problem is she's tired of people asking. The same way when we are pregnant, people complain about being tired of others touching their belly. Just a vent post.

OP, I get tired of it too. At work EVERY time I go pump (I'm a nurse so I have to tell my coworkers when I step off the floor) our secretary says, "How long are you going to nurse that kid anyway?!? Isn't it time to wean?! Soon, he'll be asking for it." She says it semi-jokingly like she thinks it's funny, but I am so over it. I finally said, "He's 8months old.I'm going to nurse him as long as I dang well please! Sheesh!"

horsevaulter · January 2014

I completely understand how ridiculously annoying this is.... ugh why cant people just mind their own business?!

opheliainwaders · January 2014

I usually just say something like, "Well, I assume she'll wean before she goes to college." And that seems to shut it down ;-)

pinottoparenthood · January 2014

I haven't had anyone give me a hard time about nursing right now, but I did have a colleague talk with me about how his sister "kept breastfeeding after her kid turned one" and it was "really inappropriate" and "made everyone uncomfortable." He then also went on to say that his own wife fed his daughters formula. I think sometimes people who haven't nursed (or haven't been around it that much) just don't get it. I thought I was going to hate it and honestly thought it was a little weird before doing it, but now I love it. My husband used to be uncomfortable at the thought, but now he's unfazed. I think it's all about what you're used to. But you know you're doing the best thing for your baby so who cares what anyone else thinks or says?!

LBeez13 · January 2014

Yeah this past weekend we were visiting my FIL and he asked me to give him a bottle so he could feed my LO. I told him there were no bottles and I was still BF. He then goes on to say, "What?!?!? Are you STILL going to breastfeed him when he's 5 years old?" My husband and I were both like, "Well, he is not even 7 months yet."

20thirteen · January 2014

LBeez13 said: Yeah this past weekend we were visiting my FIL and he asked me to give him a bottle so he could feed my LO. I told him there were no bottles and I was still BF. He then goes on to say, "What?!?!? Are you STILL going to breastfeed him when he's 5 years old?" My husband and I were both like, "Well, he is not even 7 months yet."

I get that from my ex's mom all the time. Although I have to supplement with formula, I am still BFing and I get harassed about it like it's a problem. "She's over 6mo, you don't have to breastfeed her anymore. Get her off the t*t!" I'm sorry, I figured DD would let me know when she wanted "off the t*t" and will continue to be BF until she no longer wants to. And I know I don't have to, is it an issue that I want to? Because that's none of her damn business.

WeAreSmalls · January 2014

I just find it so interesting that whether moms BF or FF there is always some sort of judgement. I FF (did some BF'ing early on but all 3 of my kids were mostly FF) and I always felt judged when someone asked if I was nursing. I always felt it would be so much easier to say yeah I'm nursing instead of my long drawn out story of trying to nurse, how little milk I produced, babies screaming at the breast, etc. I wish everyone would just mind their own business.

trudibell · January 2014

WeAreSmalls said:

I just find it so interesting that whether moms BF or FF there is always some sort of judgement. I FF (did some BF'ing early on but all 3 of my kids were mostly FF) and I always felt judged when someone asked if I was nursing. I always felt it would be so much easier to say yeah I'm nursing instead of my long drawn out story of trying to nurse, how little milk I produced, babies screaming at the breast, etc. I wish everyone would just mind their own business.

Same here, when I couldn't nurse I felt really judged by the universe. I was an only child, so it was always really strange to me when random people would ask how I'm feeding my child. It's really no one's business but yours.

Angela814 · January 2014

LBeez13 said:
Yeah this past weekend we were visiting my FIL and he asked me to give him a bottle so he could feed my LO. I told him there were no bottles and I was still BF. He then goes on to say, "What?!?!? Are you STILL going to breastfeed him when he's 5 years old?" My husband and I were both like, "Well, he is not even 7 months yet."

My MIL asked me something similar once. My answer was "maybe, if she still wants to nurse then." She never asked again. I think the more confident we are in our replies, the less the same people keep asking.

PrimRoseMama · January 2014

Nicb13 said:
What exactly is the problem? Sounds like you have it handled.

I agree. I would honestly ask someone why they feel it's any of their business how I feed my kid? The kid is fed. End of story.

amandarins · January 2014

People will always have their opinion/2 cents about your pregnancy/baby/child. When it's not about what they're eating, it's about sleep/ vaccinations/ discipline/ etc. If you don't want it to be a discussion, just tell them it's none of their business.

LisaLisa1980 · January 2014

amandarins said:

People will always have their opinion/2 cents about your pregnancy/baby/child. When it's not about what they're eating, it's about sleep/ vaccinations/ discipline/ etc. If you don't want it to be a discussion, just tell them it's none of their business.

i do and they say "it's an honest question" or "i'm just curious that;s all"

Lelo2006 · January 2014

How many people have been asking you about this? That's really strange. I've had maybe 3 people ask me in 7 months. It's never been criticized.

hollandmama · January 2014

adl3399 said:

I've been asked maybe twice about this since LO was born. But I assume people are either trying to relate to you from their own experience or are insecure about their own choices. Either way, I wouldn't worry so much about it unless someone actually starts to lecture you about it.

This... I think they are mostly insecure about their own choices or even envious of you keeping it up. BFing is though, even more if you work too, so basically they want to see you fail so they can feel better...

Unknown · February 2014

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