scratched again

maven212 · January 2014

I just don't even know what to do at this point. Last week I showed up at work with gouges in my face. Today, she was fighting with DH over putting on snow pants. I picked her up to calm the situation down and she grabbed my neck and would not stop tearing at it. I'm still bleeding. I'll show up to work tomorrow looking like I got into a bar brawl.

I've tried to distract her. I've tried to elicit empathy "that hurts mommy". I've tried loudly and very seriously saying "no. Do not do that". I'm really at a loss. All I can do is keep trimming her nails (they are really trim, so she must really be digging in there). Maybe this will stop when she starts speaking?

And where the hell did this behaviour come from in the first place?

persephonerose · January 2014

Sorry that you guys are having so much trouble.

D was really fighting me with certain things then I realized he had entered the "i do it stage". So I started working with him to show him how to do things or help me with some things. When we get dressed I always let him push his arms into the sleeves. He steps into his pants and helps me pull up the pant legs. It takes much longer to get him dressed now but he no longer fights me.

techg0ddess · January 2014

Z will pull my hair when he's frustrated. It's very hard to stop this. He usually does it when he doesn't want to go in the car seat. I just hold his hands steady and firmly and tell him to let go of my hair, pulling hair isn't nice and he needs to be nice to momma (daycare does the nice touch for them). I agree with @persephonerose about the, I do it myself stage. It's crazy. Maybe try and do your best to do everything behind her out of reach of the hands. We also do time out if we are home. Not sure how the time out would work for the car eat issue

.

We do time out in the pack n play. When he's that worked up, he melts and won't stand. He stays in there till he calms down and then I let him know what he did wrong and give him a hug. It's actually working. I can now say, if you keep doing that you're going to timeout and he'll stop.

mrscutforth · January 2014

I'm sorry you are dealing with this. Hopefully she gets over it soon.

I agree on holding her hands firmly until she calms down.

I agree with the time out thing too.

I get close to Zane's face (where I can still see his whole face) but I end up looking him right in the eye and saying no sternly. He pulls his "mother faking boo hoo face". He puts his bottom lip out and acts like he's gonna cry by closing them and peking thru his lashes at me while I am still looking at him with a straight face then he stops.

jg1011 · January 2014

I'm sorry you are dealing with this.

V has started throwing tantrums when he doesn't get his way. Kicks, screams, bangs his head , pulls my hair. Pedi told us to walk away. It will escalate for a minute or two and then he comes to follow me, but calmed down.

The " I do it " stage seems like it might fit too. Might be an idea?

Seems like the older they get, the more they let us know how they are feeling just can't wait till they can a TELL us!

LBStewart · January 2014

DD has also started throwing some tantrums. Sometimes, they are over the silliest things. I try to back off and usually she will calm down shortly.

Hopefully this is just a phase that your DD is going through and that it will pass shortly. It seems like you're doing all you can with the situation.

maven212 · January 2014

Thanks guys. I'm really happy for the advice and solace. It has been a rough week over here, and the scratching fit today was just such a bummer.

uconnhuskie007 so LO was protesting . DH was trying to put her pants on while she was in his lap and she was grumping, and then eventually laying flat and trying to slide off the chair, then she started screaming. I went over and said, "okay. Let's take a break", picked her up and that's when she grabbed at my face and neck, screaming and scratching.

I gave her nails and extra trimming tonight

@persephonerose @jg1011 @techg0dess she is definitely in the do-it-myself stage. I try to let her do as many things as she can safely do herself. DH isn't so fussy about the extra time and mess, and is more likely to try to shovel food into her, say, than cutting it into easy to handle strips etc. so she can feed herself. It never occurred to me that she could help with her snowpants, actually. Now that I think of it - this past week she has found and put on my gloves, my cowl scarf and my winter boots and tried to walk around. She routinely does this with my purse when I'm getting ready to go to work. Maybe she really wants to put the snowpants on herself.

@mrscutforth @probecita @LBstewart time outs would be a new technique. I'll give that a try tomorrow. The odd thing about this behaviour is that if she catches me napping someplace, she will gently pat my nose and coo etc.. I mean, that to me indicates she knows that there are pats that hurt me and pats that don't.

It has been a long hard day. I'm happy to see my bedtime approaching. Thanks again guys. I'll let you know how it goes.

scratched again

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