I love my DH, but sometimes...

KimS17 · January 2014

I just want to hit him. Monday night DH was out of town and my mom stayed with me. Dd was so cranky and neither one if us could calm her down and get her to sleep. Finally my mommy instincts kicked in and I put her to boob, even though she had just eaten. That calmed her down and it appeared all she wanted was to comfort suck... Ok fine. I can do that. She finally fell asleep and slept through the rest of the night.
Last night, DH is home and dd is super cranky again. I fed her, and changed her diaper and she was still screaming. DH tried calming her down with a paci, nope, she wanted no part of it. I said I would put her to boob to comfort suck since it worked the night before. He got upset and said we shouldn't because we would "be giving into her." ..... Dd is 9 weeks. I ended up letting her comfort suck and she calmed down enough to go to sleep!
Sometimes I wish DH was open enough to try things that aren't nessesarily "the norm." Anybody else's DH think there is only one way to do certain things with LO?

PrimRoseMama · January 2014

These husbands need to read a damn book & STFU.

[Deleted User] · January 2014

The user and all related content has been deleted.

Summadaze · January 2014

Yup what PRM said. I mean seriously. You would think this is our first baby and not our third. A few weeks ago Erilys wouldn't stop crying while I was out and he was like why does she cry so much. Uhm she's a baby, they do that sometimes. He swore our other kids never cried. He must have selective memory. MEN.

kelli&dave · January 2014

i can SO relate. i think my husband is jealous that nursing calms our son so quickly. i let him nurse for comfort all the time and i think my husband gets discouraged because he isn't equipped to do this. lol. sometimes it's the only thing that works.

and it's totally "the norm", not gonna spoil your LO whatsoever.

cocopuff09120 · January 2014

I'm sort of playing devils advocate here, but remember that your husband is just as much that babies parent as you are. Yes, you were 100% right that comfort sucking was okay. But your husband is also a new parent trying to learn what to do and has his own opinion which should be respected. When you are sure that you are right like in this situation it might be better to gently explain yourself and show him the research to back it up.

SharonB222 · January 2014

My DD is 2.5yo and my DH still suggests keeping her up later when she is not sleeping well. I can't tell you the number of books, articles (e.g. sleep begets sleep) and research (e.g.overtired releases adrenaline) I have had him read - in times of stress he falls back on his theory. That said, he has the patience to get DD in bed (repeatedly). Tonight I had to bite my tongue to listen to DH's tips about when DS requires burping and the best way to do that. I figure he should feel like an expert in some area - and honestly he is now the expert in this.

KimS17 · January 2014

In a perfect world showing him research would work. I will say though, he is the master at getting dd to smile and laugh as much as she's able.

hjweber · January 2014

Yep, my DH is one of those that believes you can spoil a newborn.

MVS2013 · January 2014

Adrd47 said:

Yep. When DS was a newborn, my husband thought CIO was okay bc his mother told him it was just the baby exercising his lungs. That did not go over well.

OMG! is your MIL my MIL???? she said the same thing to my DH. I wanted to bitch slap her

lmcgt · January 2014

MVS2013 said:

Adrd47 said:

Yep. When DS was a newborn, my husband thought CIO was okay bc his mother told him it was just the baby exercising his lungs. That did not go over well.

OMG! is your MIL my MIL???? she said the same thing to my DH. I wanted to bitch slap her

Omg this!! My LO was 4 days old and they stayed to help and in the middle of the night I get up and he is screaming, she is laughing and said the exact same thing! I seriously wanted to kick them out! I got my point across and DH and I still joke every time he starts to cry, oh it's good for his lungs!

yeah. · January 2014

cocopuff09120 said:

I'm sort of playing devils advocate here, but remember that your husband is just as much that babies parent as you are. Yes, you were 100% right that comfort sucking was okay. But your husband is also a new parent trying to learn what to do and has his own opinion which should be respected. When you are sure that you are right like in this situation it might be better to gently explain yourself and show him the research to back it up.

I agree with this. He may also be concerned that if your baby gets used to comfort nursing (which is fine for you), he may never be able to comfort her (not fine for him).

ForevAAROSE · January 2014

Dh is the same!!!! My LO is a month, 1 day adjusted! She gets gassy sometimes and at night she'll wake up fussy. So I'll feed her, change her diaper and put her down but she doesn't always fall asleep and will continue to fuss/cry. No one wants a crying baby at 3am, right? So ill lay her on my chest, rub her back to relieve any built up gas and she goes right to sleep. She loves it. And although its not an ideal time of day ( always around 3-4am) it helps her and then I can actually sleep rather than leaving her in her bed crying for an hour until she's worn. Dh says "stop spoiling her, let her cry". Okay she's a MONTH old, she has reflux and is gassy often so she's usually in discomfort. Should I let her scream her brains out and we both cant sleep, or comfort her and we all can sleep. Now I can see if I'd do it, and not putting her to bbed once she's oout, that may cause a problem in the future, but listen here pal, I love my skin to skin, and damnit my baby is a great cuddler. She loves that time we get together and so do i!!!
Geese.

Want a personalized experience?

I love my DH, but sometimes...

Re: I love my DH, but sometimes...

LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:

Choose Another Board

Search Boards