Another amazing validation

CRUN2012 · January 2014

Okay... so it has been about 3 months since we lost our precious Carter and these past few weeks have been pretty tough. In the beginning I felt like I was coping well and I honestly felt at peace with the situation knowing that I could not have done anything to prevent this from happening. I really couldn't believe how well I was handling things. And I am still doing pretty well I feel. However, over the holidays and finding out that 3 of my close friends are expecting, I began to struggle a little more than I had since the week that it happened. Anyway, I continue to talk to and pray for my baby Carter and I work though my grief by journaling, which helps tremendously. But I still couldn't shake the feeling that I could've done more during my pregnancy. Maybe not to have prevented this from happening but maybe to have caught something sooner, or to have been healthier, etc. So-the point of my story is this. Yesterday I received a phone call from one of my very best girlfriends since childhood whose wedding I was recently in. She said to me on the phone "okay, I have a something to tell you and I don't want you to think I'm crazy." I sort of thought she was going to tell me she was pregnant, and I was prepared for it, but I didn't know why she thought I would think she was crazy? Haha Anyway, she said she had gone to a Medium that day and that she had a message for me from Carter. She said that Carter wanted her to tell his mom that he is her angel and he is at peace and happy. The Medium told her to tell Carter's mom that if she has any guilty feelings about what happened that she needs to let go of them. The Medium said that there was nothing that could have been done as it he was not meant to be born yet. The Medium then said to tell Carter's mom that Carter's soul will be returning soon. She said to also tell me to keep praying and talking to Carter because he is listening. I was so amazed by this message and I interpret it that I will have my baby again in my future and I cannot tell you how relieved I feel. Of course, I understand that this could be interpreted a million different ways, but this is how I choose. I have posted before about going to a Medium's show and although many people may not believe in this, that is okay. For me it validated everything I had been feeling and it just came at the perfect time. I hope that those of you who do believe in this sort of thing will find comfort in this. As painful as this all is and although we may never know why, we were chosen for this and we WILL make it through to see our babies once again! HUGS to you all!!!!