This sucks, I'm so confused. — The Bump
Special Needs

This sucks, I'm so confused.

So now I'm more flippin' confused than I have answers.

A few weeks ago the doc we are seeing said that DS shows signs of ADHD and anxiety. He said he needed to meet with DS's teacher to get some clarification on her test answers.

So today, I got a call from the doctor who advised me that he still needs to review the paperwork, but it is looking more like Aspergers.

My mind went blank then, my head was spinning. I didn't know how to answer that, the words, the thoughts I wanted to say weren't coming out.

"Why?" I asked him. "Why? His verbal skills you tested were a year above his actual age. On the DSM-5, isnt verbal one of the factors for ASD? Am I wrong?". He replied, "we'll there are categories on there, and he's going to need support."

I replied, "Yes, we totally agree with that. But you said last time he has strong signs of ADHD, and minimal signs if that of ASD. Can't ADHD mimic ASD? I read that it can."

I don't want to be a bit**h, but wth? While I think he would benefit from the support of ASD in school, I think the line is so blurred with his needs that he wants to give him a DX which will support him the most at this age. Why??

I'm terrified, angry , mad. Dh isnt saying much because we are still in the DX process...final results won't be for a few weeks. His OT, doesn't believe he has ASD. This is so subjective ... there isn't blood work, or mris which could make such a DX.


This sucks.
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Re: This sucks, I'm so confused.

  • That does suck. I would wait for your doctor's clarification before getting too anxious. It'll do no good. It's just sucky and hopefully you'll have better information soon, whatever the diagnosis is. Whatever the label is, it doesn't change who your son is.
    Princess_LilyCaptainSerious
  • Princess_LilyPrincess_Lily
    Sixth Anniversary 250 Answers 2500 Comments 500 Love Its
    member
    edited January 2014
    Thank you everyone! 

    So this morning, to give you all an update...

     I spoke with the doctor (again), first he apologized for providing information too prematurely.  He said he needs to still gather ALL of the test score information to provide a proper dx.  He said it was too premature to even discuss with me anything, because it does leave more questions and concerns than answers.

    He said that he had to meet with his teacher because her answers were slightly different from ours.  He said that while the teacher provided information which shows similarities to ASD (aspergers), that doesn't mean it is conclusive of that.   

    That being said, if it is that though, we will take it one day at a time.

    In a few weeks time we will be provided a 15-pg report on the dx; At which time we review at home and schedule another meeting to go over the report and ask any questions if/where needed.

    The conversation this morning provided me more insight, then yesterday.
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  • Princess_Lily, I am living an almost parallel life to yours right now. Complete with the new baby sister and everything. LOL
    It is so overwhelming and confusing at times!! :-(
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    Princess_Lily
  • edited January 2014
    I can definitely relate. my kiddo just got an asd dx. no one suspected it. at 18 months i brought her to the pedi and she told me no way when she sat and listened to a story and pointed to objects she saw and looked up at her while saying the words. at 24 months we were told no way when she had a tea party with the top asd diagnostician and her intern. she eventually did get the dx and she is social. i remember when the developmental pedi mentioned it in the realm of possibility that i had read adhd and asd look similar and adhd is in my family. she said absolutely they have overlapping symptoms and with young kids it can be difficult to distinguish what disorder is driving the behavior. she said even if she eventually switched the dx from one to the other it wouldn't matter either way. you treat the symptoms not the dx. I know how confusing and frustrating this must be and i hope you get answers soon.
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    Princess_Lily
  • edited January 2014
    Oh i could understand that its important down the road so the appropriate modifications could be made depending on the root cause. i get she said that in the context of a preschool age kid as the accomodations for a 3 year old with asd and adhd are one in the same. Probably a bit easier to correctly dx a 10 year old vs 3 year old.
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  • I'm finding that as the days progress, I am more accepting of a possible ASD DX if found. I'm just scared of the unknown.

    I only told DH and my mom, i want to tell my dad but when my grandmother leaves. My dads family is nice but I don't want them to know, they will talk about other peoples weaknesses until they're blue in the face at every single dinner/gtg and I don't want DS to be their new topic.
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