Attachment Parenting

How to wean the AP way?

My DD just turned a year on January 13th.  I had EBF up until 11 months when I got permission from our ped to mix BM with WCM since I wasn't making enough to send bottles to daycare.  At home we just nurse and she takes WCM from a sippy at meals. 

I am freaking out thinking about weaning her.  Currently we nurse on demand which is always before her two naps, bedtime and once at night.  It sometimes includes first thing in the morning, and after naps or more at night if needed.  But at least 4 times a day.  She has little to no interest in nursing when wide awake anymore, just when she is planning on sleeping.  My supply took a huge hit last week when I had the stomach flu and it has made me think about how in the heck we are going to wean.  The easy part would be just to stop offering during the day but what about before naps and especially at night?  Offer a bottle?  Sippy?  Water?  We have a good nursing relationship and I don't want her to feel cut off so how does it happen without ending up nursing until they are three?  I am fine with another 6 months or so but would like to be done by the time she is not much older than 18 months and might have to sooner if my supply keeps tanking.  Does anyone have experience with this without just cutting her off? 

Also, when we nurse she lays on a pillow on my lap and we nurse and I put her in her crib.  No rocking or anything.  When we drop nursing, do I rock her?  It feels weird to just read a story and plop her in her crib.  Sigh... so many questions...

BabyFruit Ticker

Re: How to wean the AP way?

  • I am by no means an expert, but if she is already showing no interest while awake and your supply is dropping then it just seems like it may all taper off in the coming months on it's own...in a gentle way.  I think a lot of AP mom's start the "don't offer, don't refuse" when they want to start weaning...where they only nurse if the child explicitly asks for it (how ever that is for your child). 

    Anything new will feel weird...it will be trial and error for a bit.  Try just cuddling with a story and see if she goes down.  She'll let you know if she wants to be rocked!  She can have a sippy cup of milk while you read if you want. 

    Anyways, I think it sounds like it could be quite smooth and natural for you if she is showing less interest and your milk is slowing...you might luck out and it all takes place smoothly in the next few months!!

     

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  • I hope so.  I really enjoy it and it has been such a nice journey for us that I feel really emotional towards it eventually ending and I really want it to be a smooth transition for us.  She was physically unable to bottle until 5 months so she and I were really attached to nursing. I understand the don't offer thing and I stopped offering a while ago while awake since she kept refusing but I don't even know how to go about "not offering" when getting ready to nap or sleep.  She doesn't really ask for it then, it is just how we have always "wound down."  I just don't want her to be distressed or cause further night wakings because she is not drinking before she sleeps.  This is so hard!
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • You don't necessarily have to wean her.  You can let her wean herself, and not worry about supply.  DD just stopped nursing before bedtime (the last nursing session we had) about two months ago.  She did it on her own.  She's over 3.5yrs old, so I don't think she was getting a whole lot, but she didn't care.  It was comfort to her.  So I don't want you to think that you have to stop nursing entirely just because your supply is low.  (And it may rebound after fully recovering from the flu.)

    But I would do it slowly, and I would TALK to her about it.  At this age, she won't entirely understand, but start to talk to her about it, and she may understand more than you think.
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  • nosoup4unosoup4u member
    edited January 2014
    My cut off w XBF was 2, but both my kids nursed til about 2.5. At the end it was mainly naps/nighttime, so don't necessarily decided now how long you guys have to nurse for. And I really enjoyed nursing toddlers, it's an easy way to comfort them, and it's not as high-pressure bc you're no longer the sole source if nutrition.

    We transitioned from me lying by DS1 while he nursed to sleep, to me nursing him and popping him off and then singing him to sleep. With DS2, he would have one last nursing session while we read books in his brother's room, and then he'd fall asleep w me or DH next to him. Both ways were gradual and not very tearful for my kids. hth
    DS1 - Feb 2008

    DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)

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