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Am I wrong? Opinions needed!!

JackoftheBoxJackoftheBox member
in One & Done: Only child
My cousin has invited me to her nieces birthday party (so my second cousin). I politely declined and told her i would still like to send a gift. Today she asked me why I didn't want to come. So I told her it was because I didn't want to be around the little girls mother (my cousins girlfriend not my cousin) or her family. She told me that she thought I was being hurtful and childish and that I often invite people that she doesn't like to things and yet she still comes. I simply told her that I wasn't going to argue with her, and that it was my choice whom I expose myself and my son to.

Back story. Q's mom (the little girl) is heavily into drugs as is her entire family. They are trashy to say the least. When we went to her baby shower it was held in a bar (1st red flag), during business hours and half of the family was wasted (2nd red flag), and then I realized I smelled pot!! At a freaking baby shower! And that was the straw. We left and I have never been to a function with them again.
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Re: Am I wrong? Opinions needed!!

  • JackoftheBoxJackoftheBox member
    OhBenji said:

    No, you're not wrong for not wanting to be around people like that.

    I do feel bad for the child since I'm sure she'd be happy to see her family at her party. Can you just go and stay for a little while then leave?

    Also why is her aunt inviting you and not her dad? Just curious.

    Probably because he is in jail for domestic abuse and SELLING DRUGS across state lines. Lol isn't that just a kicker?!  

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  • JackoftheBoxJackoftheBox member
    EAMartin1004 said:
    You are not wrong.  I am surprised that your cousin isn't bothered by her friends behavior.  
    It's her kinda sister in laws behavior. And i think she is but she doesn't want to piss off her family (meaning her brother and her mom who lives life obliviously).
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  • tifdaski84tifdaski84 member
    I don't think you're wrong in not wanting to go for those reasons but I might've came up with a different excuse.  Like, you were busy or whatever, just to avoid stirring the pot.  But I'm the type of person to avoid all and any confrontation.
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  • JackoftheBoxJackoftheBox member
    Possum2011 said:
    I don't think you're wrong in not wanting to go for those reasons but I might've came up with a different excuse.  Like, you were busy or whatever, just to avoid stirring the pot.  But I'm the type of person to avoid all and any confrontation.
    I thought about this but lying makes me feel SO GUILTY. 
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  • JackoftheBoxJackoftheBox member
    Ok thanks ladies. @bostonkisses2 this is exactly the mentality she has. She always uses this to guilt people into stuff! Ugh.

    I just wanted other opinions to make sure i wasn't being bitchy for no reason.
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  • kristenndkristennd member
    I would have skipped the party without guilt. I may have lied about why.
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  • eyenigheyenigh member
    OhBenji said:

    No, you're not wrong for not wanting to be around people like that.

    I do feel bad for the child since I'm sure she'd be happy to see her family at her party. Can you just go and stay for a little while then leave?

    This is exactly the feeling that we have with our niece's birthday parties (husband's sister). I don't want to go even a little bit but my husband points out that we're the only decent family she has that shows up in the group of unemployed drunk smokers that makes up the girls' mother's circle of friends and sometimes it's nice for an uncle to be there for when the father is in jail. UGH. I feel bad for the kids but it's one thing to go alone and it's another take my son. I don't like him around all the smoke and, in general, just the attitude of that group sucks. Luckily, I think the father has been in jail again so they can't afford parties so we got out of it this last fall.
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  • PB102012PB102012 member
    I 100% agree with you, there's no way that I would want to be around people like that. I don't blame you one bit.

     Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

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