Normal behavior for 17 month old

Jessrof · January 2014

So... I have always been a bit paranoid about my son and his development. He was always been a very intense baby (colicky, wouldn't allow us to put him down) and then has become an intense toddler. He is delayed in speech but has approximately 10 words and 3 signs and will mimic what we say to him.

When interacting with his peers, I have noticed that he doesn't "pretend". He doesn't pretend to feed dolls or toys while his peers try to have their toys nurse with them all the time. He also does not try to feed his animals with a spoon. He also doesn't seem to have a preference for things. His peers have favorite toys but he does not. I know this is all trivial, but he just doesn't seem as grown up as his peers.... he just doesn't seem with it.

If anyone else has the same experience, please help this mommy sleep at night...

traveltheworld · January 2014

Why do you think he is delayed in speech? Have you had him evaluated? Because if not, 10 words at 17 months is within the range of normal. As to pretend play, lots of children don't do that. DS doesn't feed his dolls, but does pretend to feed us food all the time. Does your DS engage in any type of imaginative play like that? Also, I don't think it's that abnormal to not have a favourite toy. DS prefers some of his toys more than others, but I wouldn't say he has a "favourite" other.

Jessrof · January 2014

At his 12 month appt we were referred to EI and he was deemed delayed in expressive communication and fine motor. We do play therapy and work on lots of things at home. He does pretend to eat things and and feed them to me

Everyusernameistaken · January 2014

Hi! Sorry you are going through this. Language wise he doesn't sound all that delayed to be honest. He's about where my son was at 17 months language wise and it's true that there's a huge leap at 18 months.

It's so interesting how it varies Dr to Dr...my friends son has ZERO words at 18 months and Dr says not to worry until 2 years old, and my speech path friend agrees.

As for the the social stuff, my son only started "feeding" his toys after 18 months.

It sounds like you are an awesome mama who's doing all that she can for her kid! Trust your gut if you think something is "off."

Jessrof · January 2014

Thank you. I just feel like my pediatrician focuses too much on developmental screenings instead of looking at the child. It keeps me up at night with worry

ashiscute · January 2014

My DD has a speech delay and didn't say her first word until 18 months. She started speech therapy at 17 mos (after being referred at 15 mos). Anyway, she was similar to your DS in that she didn't do much in pretend play, she never made sound effects while playing if you know what I mean. She also didn't have a lovey or any toys she really seemed attached to.

The closer she got to 2 though the more really blossomed and changed. Now she will be 3 next week and is bubbly and happy and nothing like that intense 17 mo she was. I hope this makes you feel better. I know that it's hard not to worry about your child and I worried about my DD not being like other kids but she just needed a bit more time. She still got there.

ELF4321 · January 2014

Jessrof said:
Thank you. I just feel like my pediatrician focuses too much on developmental screenings instead of looking at the child. It keeps me up at night with worry

I agree with the others that your son sounds totally normal for his age. If you don't really agree with your pedi's approach to things, it is probably worth looking for a new one.

cedenton · January 2014

10 words is not delayed speech for a 17 month old. Not at all. My son also doesn't pretend to do things that I understand. Sometimes he has things in his hand and he seems to be pretending to do something with it, but I don't have a clue what it is. I think he sounds just fine.

MaggieF516 · January 2014

My son has never pretended to do something with a stuffed animal. He actually doesn't really care for stuffed animals and only holds them when we are rocking to go to sleep. He will pretend with other household items and mimic things he's seen me do with them, but not all of the time. He doesn't really have favorite toys, but carries around 2 pacifiers and has one in his mouth so I guess that's his favorite thing. He just jumps from one toy to the next. He has so much energy and his attention is never with one thing more than a few minutes tops. I think as long as your son is alert and interested in things around him, is interested in playing, etc. he should be ok. Of course ask the pedi if you are worried though.

Jessrof · January 2014

ashiscute said:

My DD has a speech delay and didn't say her first word until 18 months. She started speech therapy at 17 mos (after being referred at 15 mos). Anyway, she was similar to your DS in that she didn't do much in pretend play, she never made sound effects while playing if you know what I mean. She also didn't have a lovey or any toys she really seemed attached to.

The closer she got to 2 though the more really blossomed and changed. Now she will be 3 next week and is bubbly and happy and nothing like that intense 17 mo she was. I hope this makes you feel better. I know that it's hard not to worry about your child and I worried about my DD not being like other kids but she just needed a bit more time. She still got there.

This does make me feel much better! Thank you for sharing!

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