I swore I would never make this post....

pinottoparenthood · January 2014

I swore I would never make this post... and I'm always the one saying "every baby develops at his own rate"... but I'm worried that Rhys is behind :-(

It's Tube Tuesday on the facebook page, and looking at everyone's adorable videos, I can't help but notice that Rhys doesn't do any of the things that the other babies do.

-He doesn't walk. (Holy crap, lots of babies walking with walkers... he just started pulling up 3 days ago)

-He doesn't wave

-He doesn't clap

-He doesn't imitate sounds

I keep thinking about how late he has done everything (like not rolling over until after 6 months), and I am starting to get worried. When I watch all the other babies, they just seem so much more interactive than Rhys. Ugh. Not sure what the point of this post is, except I'm just starting to feel a little worried.

arschm02 · January 2014

Don't worry. Will can't walk. He's nowhere near close to it (he just started stepping while I hold his hands). I noticed he clapped two Sundays ago in church and randomly since then, but never on command. He's only waved a handful of times. And he sure doesn't copy sounds. I am finally hearing bababa out of him and every once in a while ma. He can make one hell of a wookie sound though. It's hilarious. I'll take it over mama and dada any day.

Every time someone would say, oh if they're late to develop physically they're probably just developing verbally.... Yeah. Not my kid. His just slower at all of it but I'm not in the least bit worried because it's not significantly slower or behind. He'll catch up.

pinottoparenthood · January 2014

@arschm02 That's how we are, too... it seems like he's behind physically and verbally.

@melandjames14 We see the doctor on Thursday so we will talk to her while we are there. I am more worried about the mental/verbal development than the physical. :-(

ChicagoBroad26 · January 2014

I could have written your post with Ava. She didn't pull up until after 9 months, didn't crawl until 9.5 months, etc. Mila isn't imitating sounds at this age, either, although she's babbling. If your pedi isn't worried, I'd try to stay calm (easier said than done, I know). I'm also shocked that there are already walkers in this age group. I'm sure he's fine; you're doing great and I can tell from pictures that he's a happy little guy.

arschm02 · January 2014

I've also had several 1 year olds at work not do any of these things either. I just think these A13 babies are super babies or something!

jaime52005 · January 2014

Ella doesn't clap or wave barely walks with a walker..didn't crawl till 8.5 months

ClandestineX · January 2014

I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I would feel the exact same if I were in your shoes. I agree what PP have said and talk to your pediatrician about it if you are really worried. I know people say this all the time, but these milestone things are literally day by day.. meaning one day they aren't doing it.. the next they can do three new things.

MsAmeera25 · January 2014

Try not to stress about it. I know easier said than done. Besides Rhys is too busy being cute to do those things. Its hard work being so handsome

JSS1002 · January 2014

James is almost 10 months and he doesn't even crawl yet. Only imitates some sounds, doesn't wave. He does clap, and makes a lot of sounds with his mouth (blowing raspberries,clicking), and consonants, and loves to stand up assisted, but no way is he anywhere near close to walking / standing with his walking toy.

I am concerned about his lack of crawling,but the doctor isn't concerned per his 9 month appt two weeks ago, so I'm trying to let it go and just focus on working with him on it - lots of tummy time, encouraging him to reach for toys,etc.

JSS1002 · January 2014

Also, I'll add, at his 6 month appt, when I asked her about crawling and when to expect it, she seemed to think 9 or 10 months was the normal "start" time, so I've always been surprised that so many of the A13 babies started crawling and pulling up so soon. He's doing neither of those things (though I think he's close to crawling - he's certainly trying, just can't quite put it together yet).

danuli8 · January 2014

My DS doesn't do any of those things either. The pedi (at the 9-month) was not concerned at all and said he was doing great. DS can crawl and is starting to pull up too, so it sounds like our boys are on the same track.

08summerbride · January 2014

Thomas is not clapping, pointing, or imitating really. He just started saying "da" this week. (he will be 10 months on the 2nd)

My oldest was behind physically. ...didn't crawl until a year, didn't walk until 17 months, and she caught up very quickly once she figured it out.

I thought since she was behind and turned out fine, I would be less worried about milestones this time, but I still worry that he should be doing more.
Have you had your 9 month well check yet? Hopefully your pediatrician will reassure you and ease your mind some.

cfattig · January 2014

Sawyer pulls up on stuff, but isn't walking. I've been working with him on clapping, waving, blowing kisses, and other signs, but he hasn't done those either. I don't know for sure, but am willing to bet way more kids are in our boat than doing all those things you mentioned. Parents like to brag and show off when their child does something cool (as well they should on here, because this is a great place to show off your child), but parents aren't going to speak out as much and say "hey my kid is average" or something.

. Mt ped said average for walking is twelve to fourteen months, so I wouldn't think twice about your son. Ill bet he does some cool things that other babies on here can't do yet. I get what you are saying, though. We all want healthy, smart, successful kids

Debbie0580 · January 2014

Daley is 9.5 mos and doesn't do any of those things. And she can't pull up all the way yet, only to her knees. We play patty cake out the ying and she still doesn't clap. She smiles, laughs and responds appropriately to peek-a-boo and other games, and she wants to be all up in her brother's biz, so I think she is developing well socially.
DS didn't cruise furniture until a year or later and didn't walk until 14 months. I had 2 friends who's kids walked at 8 mos. I was constantly questioning myself. But he is the exact same as those kids now. Runs as fast. Talks as much - sometimes more. Acts just as silly and it drives me up the wall. When he started walking though, it was like he just took off. Wasn't wobbly. Didn't have many falls. He just wasn't ready until he was ready!
I'm not concerned about DD, but when discussing milestones at her 9 month visit, one of the NPs questions was if she was cruising and I of course said no, her response was "oh she's still young."
Everything is an average - there are going to be babies on the fast side and babies on the slow side. Just like with growth charts - someone's baby is going to be in the 90th and someone's baby is going to be in the 10th.
Long story short, try not to worry. But, as always, if you are truly concerned have a conversation with your doctor.

ceamac0127 · January 2014

I would feel the same way. Bring up your concerns at the dr but I'm sure everything is okay. Rhys is just showing up the other babies by being so much more handsome

sapphire021 · January 2014

I hope your Pedi can calm your nerves, I would try not too worry. As others have said, easier said than done. Just an example of how babies develop at different rates, my niece and nephew are 3 weeks apart in age, nephew being older. He hit every milestone several MONTHS behind my niece, but he is just fine. He is 16 months and is just NOW starting to walk consistently, while my niece has been walking since 10 months. She also is a lot more vocal than he is. I know you said you are more worried about verbal than physical, but I still feel he could just be taking his time, and I hope your Pedi can reassure you when you see them.

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JBDamonM · January 2014

JSS1002 said:

James is almost 10 months and he doesn't even crawl yet. Only imitates some sounds, doesn't wave. He does clap, and makes a lot of sounds with his mouth (blowing raspberries,clicking), and consonants, and loves to stand up assisted, but no way is he anywhere near close to walking / standing with his walking toy.

I am concerned about his lack of crawling,but the doctor isn't concerned per his 9 month appt two weeks ago, so I'm trying to let it go and just focus on working with him on it - lots of tummy time, encouraging him to reach for toys,etc.

This!! Exactly! (Per the usual @JSS1002)..... @pinotoparenthood - I too worry. Sometimes I debate not coming to the A13 board bc it sometimes makes me worry more

My LO claps and talks a lot, but she's horrible with new textured food and in addition to not crawling (and really no apparent interest)....she's also not pulling herself up....she really seems to have no interest in the physical stuff. All of the kids in her daycare class crawl, pull themselves up, cruise etc. FWIW - I crawled at 11 months and DH never crawled. My pedi said it wouldn't factor in but I don't really believe that, or at least that's what I tell myself. Hang in there. I certainly know the feeling if you ever want to vent.

skidderdo · January 2014

There is absolutely no harm in bringing Rhys in to see the doctor to discuss these concerns. You could even discuss the possibility of a physical therapy evaluation, if that seems reasonable. PPs are correct though that there is a very wide range of "normal" with all these developmental milestones. That being said, if Rhys IS delayed, the earlier you get into therapy the better the "catch up" is. I'd just schedule a visit. You can also google "ages and stages 9 month questionnaire," fill it out and bring it to the visit- it's a great developmental screen.

ClandestineX · January 2014

skidderdo said:

There is absolutely no harm in bringing Rhys in to see the doctor to discuss these concerns. You could even discuss the possibility of a physical therapy evaluation, if that seems reasonable. PPs are correct though that there is a very wide range of "normal" with all these developmental milestones. That being said, if Rhys IS delayed, the earlier you get into therapy the better the "catch up" is. I'd just schedule a visit. You can also google "ages and stages 9 month questionnaire," fill it out and bring it to the visit- it's a great developmental screen.

Some of these questions are funny!

Here is the link to those who are on phone or can't find it.

https://www.wrnmmc.capmed.mil/Health Services/Medicine/Pediatrics/Shared Documents/ASQ-3 9 Mo Set B.pdf

melissad23 · January 2014

@pinottoparenthood - while Maddie is pulling up and what my sister deemed - gimpy peg-leg pirate crawling, she isn't clapping or waving or really mimicking much at all. I know we've kind of mentioned before, but don't forget, Rhys is at least a couple weeks younger than a lot of the babies. All I want to offer is encouragement, because I know I've felt similar in the past. creepy internet encouragement and hugs!!

AprilloMom · January 2014

My son is 9 months on the 24th. He doesn't crawl yet and has just started making it up onto his knees. He started clapping a few days ago, but it's hit or miss. It doesn't help that our little guys are the young ones of the board....everyone has always seemed ahead of us.

Debbie0580 · January 2014

@melissad23 oh my gosh. We call DDs crawl a pirate crawl too. Lol. DS crawled the same way. It's too funny.

megandscott07 · January 2014

I had the exact same concerns as you and our pedi is not concerned at all. And like PP mentioned, just in the past 2 days he started walking behind toys and pulling himself up, but still does not imitate. Do not worry! I'm sure everything is a-ok.

Sarahbeth1169 · January 2014

I feel the same way about Mason. He can get on all 4's and will rock and move a little forward but doesn't crawl. He is starting to pull himself up when he grabs my shirt. I been really working with him on high five so he does do that. But as for waving he doesn't do well with this we been working with him but he just don't seem like he cares. We put him in the walker a lot to help build his legs so he can walk in a walker. He has always wanted to stand so I'm not sure he will crawl and he may go right to walking. Although I personal don't want him to walk yet since he is just going to be 9 months on Friday 24th. I feel from what people have told me they don't normal walk til a year. I would talk to your doctor if you have concerns.

TuckleUp · January 2014

I don't think you can really teach a baby this young to do things they aren't ready to do, but you can definitely encourage it! This! And what @skidderoo said. I hope you feel better after speaking with the doctor. Let us know!

kgs0505 · January 2014

Try not to compare. If you look at the ranges for milestones, they are huge! My son was at the tail end over every single gross motor skill milestone. He didn't roll until about 6 months old. he didn't crawl until days before he turned 9 months, Then within two weeks he was pulling himself up on furntiure and cruising around. But, he was so satisfied with that method of movement, he didn't take independent steps until 14.5 months. Instead, he worked on a lot of verbal skills. That doesn't mean he talked super early, he didn't. But once he started saying words around 11 months old, he just took off. Did he wave or clap by now? Absoluetley not. Did I teach him those things? No, I didn't. It didn't really occur to me to do so.

My girls are on the same trajectory as M was. They are actually a little further behind him. At 9.5 months old, they still aren't crawling. They can sit up, but not get there themselves. They don't really wave or clap (again, I haven't taught them these things). They are starting to make syllable sounds, and they can say mama and dada. I know they understand me. They "help" me get them dressed by cooperating with arms. When I say, legs down when I change their diaper, they put their legs down. So I know they are developing their little brains more than their physical selves.

Definitely talk to your doctor if you are concerned. Mine talked to me about PT for the girls, I declined for now, but I am watching them more to see if they are showing progression. If they don't start crawling sometime in February, then, yes, I will go forward with PT. I think they are progressing personally. And truly, once they do start crawling, their worlds open up and the skills keep coming. That's why some babies seem so far advanced, they were probably early crawlers. They gained the muscle strength to be able to move on to the next skill sets earlier.

Lhyacinth888 · January 2014

I know you have heard it before but all babies develop differently. Some do gross motor skills first, some fine motor skills, some are better verbally and some seem to be late in everything because they are slowly working on everything at the same time and don't have one specific area they are great at. My first DS didn't walk until he was 14 months and was slower to hit his milestones but all of a sudden he just started doing new things every day for about a month and then was right on track developmentally. Like others said check with your pediatrician and just be sure to give him plenty of practice. Try not to worry which is definitely easier said then done.

lilbit0910 · January 2014

I know i mentioned this on FB but i dont think you should worry just yet. Rylee started doing these things from one day to the next. I think all babies develop a a different rate. It took Rylee literally two months of me trying to teach her how to clap then all of a sudden she did it. She also does not walk. She uses her walker but is still afraid. My advice is to make sure your daycare/babysitter is being as interactive as possible with him. He will be doing these things in no time!

Kate_C · January 2014

Another vote for the try not to worry camp. Helen isn't crawling or standing yet either. She flails her hand around in what one could generously call a wave, but it doesn't seem an intentional form of communication.

He is not alone and he is most likely not "behind" either. The range of normal is huge. We put so much pressure on ourselves and our kids to be over achievers. It could drive you nuts to worry about being first at milestones. He will develop just fine at his own pace!

pinottoparenthood · January 2014

Thank you guys so much for your seriously overwhelming support :-) I was shocked to see so many responses! @skidderdo I am definitely going to check out the ages and stages questionnaire. we go to the pediatrician tomorrow, so I am going to do that before the appointment so that I can have a more concrete discussion with her about where Rhys is. I will let you guys know what she says! Thanks also to everyone who shared similar concerns... it's nice to know I'm not alone. Yall are the best!

pinottoparenthood · January 2014

Actually, looking at the ages and stages questionnaire, they give that to us every time we go to the doctor's! But it's nice having it in advance so that I can actually try some of the things and see if he can do them... since sometimes I'm like WTF, how am I supposed to know if he can pick up a puff with his toes while whistling Yankee Doodle and smiling?

ceamac0127 · January 2014

pinottoparenthood said:

Actually, looking at the ages and stages questionnaire, they give that to us every time we go to the doctor's! But it's nice having it in advance so that I can actually try some of the things and see if he can do them... since sometimes I'm like WTF, how am I supposed to know if he can pick up a puff with his toes while whistling Yankee Doodle and smiling?

oh guuuurl if hes not doing that yet, hes in big trouble. Addi was doing that at 3 weeks old

)

pinottoparenthood · January 2014

cmcmillan0901 said:

pinottoparenthood said:

Actually, looking at the ages and stages questionnaire, they give that to us every time we go to the doctor's! But it's nice having it in advance so that I can actually try some of the things and see if he can do them... since sometimes I'm like WTF, how am I supposed to know if he can pick up a puff with his toes while whistling Yankee Doodle and smiling?

oh guuuurl if hes not doing that yet, hes in big trouble. Addi was doing that at 3 weeks old

)

You and your incessant bragging! At least have the courtesy to humble-brag!

burneyonboard · January 2014

Every baby is different. My daughter didn't crawl until she was 10 months and walked at 12 but she knew her abcs at 17 months. Baby's learn some things fast and other things slower. Carter isn't walking or clapping yet. I agree to ask your doctor but try not to stress:)

JSS1002 · January 2014

pinottoparenthood said:

cmcmillan0901 said:

pinottoparenthood said:

Actually, looking at the ages and stages questionnaire, they give that to us every time we go to the doctor's! But it's nice having it in advance so that I can actually try some of the things and see if he can do them... since sometimes I'm like WTF, how am I supposed to know if he can pick up a puff with his toes while whistling Yankee Doodle and smiling?

oh guuuurl if hes not doing that yet, hes in big trouble. Addi was doing that at 3 weeks old

)

You and your incessant bragging! At least have the courtesy to humble-brag!

Right, it should be more like "I can NEVER finish my daily workout because once I get done cleaning the house and teaching nuclear physics, LO distracts me so much by whistling yankee doodle while picking up puffs with her feet. Argh! I SUCK!"

katie6/26/04 · January 2014

My dd is 9 months today and only rolls and sits. Ds was on the slow end is things, but once he got it he made lots of fast progress.

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