Over zealous siblings?

swirl25 · January 2014

Anyone else with this problem? While we are dealing with some jealousy issues DD1 loves the baby and always wants to hug and kiss her, but she doesn't seem to know her own strength. She tries to hug the baby around her head and is always up in her face, which inevitably ends with the baby crying and us pulling DD off LO. I don't want her to feel like she can't be trusted around the baby, but I'm so tired of having to police the two of them literally every second. Maybe there's no real solution but am open to any tips!

BoothBaby · January 2014

FTM here, but maybe practice with her using a doll so she learns the right and wrong way to touch baby?

haliepell · January 2014

My 3 year old DD is sorta like that, she's always kissing on the baby ESP when I'm breastfeeding, another thing is she suddenly became immobile when it comes to dressing or putting her shoes on, something she's done by herself before, within the next couple months I think it will be worse bc she starts school in August! lord help me!

MissyC979 · January 2014

Yes, DS1 is also over zealous. He also seems to forget about the baby a lot. Lots of near-misses. I feel like I'm always having to remind him to be careful about the baby and to be gentle. Hopefully the message will kick in soon.

swirl25 · January 2014

MissyC979 said:

Yes, DS1 is also over zealous. He also seems to forget about the baby a lot. Lots of near-misses. I feel like I'm always having to remind him to be careful about the baby and to be gentle. Hopefully the message will kick in soon.

Yes, I feel like a broken record repeating myself 80 times a day...hoping it sticks soon too! @haliepell, my DD has also become helpless in ways she used to be independent before -- I guess it's all part of them getting adjusted and wanting to be like the baby that gets so much of our attention?

Red_Dahlia · January 2014

Yes, I say Be Gentle! Don't touch his hands! Back up and give him some space! about a million times a day. DD likes to sit in her PB Anywhere Chair and hold DS on her lap (with his back to her), and that position seems to work really well. She says that she's Santa and asks him what he wants for Christmas.

There is also a Gabba Gabba episode about babies that teaches that you have to be gentle and give babies space or they get scared. We remind DD about that episode sometimes as well. (It is On Demand on Uverse, so she's seen it a ton of times)

swirl25 · January 2014

Red_Dahlia said:

Yes, I say Be Gentle! Don't touch his hands! Back up and give him some space! about a million times a day. DD likes to sit in her PB Anywhere Chair and hold DS on her lap (with his back to her), and that position seems to work really well. She says that she's Santa and asks him what he wants for Christmas. There is also a Gabba Gabba episode about babies that teaches that you have to be gentle and give babies space or they get scared. We remind DD about that episode sometimes as well. (It is On Demand on Uverse, so she's seen it a ton of times)

I should try to find that episode and show it to DD -- good idea!

utlawgirl · January 2014

Uh, yeah... same boat. DD1 is 3 and she looooves her baby sister, maybe a little too much. I'm a broken record, too: "Be gentle." "Give her space." "She doesn't like that." Unless DD2 is screaming or DD1 is doing something dangerous/painful, I try to let them be for a little bit (like a minute) before I physically intervene.

hjweber · January 2014

No advise but I'm in the same boat. Constant 'be careful' 'be gentle' 'not so loud' 'don't squeeze'....

zou bisou · January 2014

Try limiting where DD kisses. For instance, say "Baby has the sweetest toes. Can you kiss those?". So she still shows love but not in a suffocation risk kind of way.

airsica · January 2014

Mine are over zealous too. They don't hug but they kiss him all the time. I have made a rule of hands or top of head only. There have been times when they try to hold his hand or touch him and they tug too hard. I tell them gentle touches and when they can't do that then I tell them gentle touches on Mommy. that helps a little because now they come up and rub my arm instead of rubbing him too hard.

lp0 · January 2014

DS is like a bull in a china shop with DD (well actually in general lol). He is constantly trying to hug, kiss, hold and pick her up. He initially does very gentle but then gets so excited that he squeezes her or tries to pull her arm off. He also tries to climb in her swing with her which makes me crazy.

He's not jealous but likes to sit with us and cuddle. I try not to tell him no or be negative when he's touching DD because I don't want him to associate her with being in trouble. For her sake though I hope she gets big and tough quick lol.

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