Single Parents

Where do you have visitation?

Wondering ideas from you all on where are some good alternatives to in home visitations. The whole McDonald's idea doesn't sound like a great one to me. I'd like to be able to conduct in home visits with BD, but I have a lot of fear he'll escalate things and start arguments with me and such. I just don't trust him, don't have family/friends to be able to be around during visits, and won't be granted supervised visitation because violence hasn't occurred since when we were married years ago. Since she will be newborn/infant, I'm just not sure how to do this. I know there is a domestic violence center that offers a room even if you don't have current DV stuff going on, but odds are he will want nothing to do with that.

PCOS // Loss 3/2010 // Single Mom // Natural Birth // DC Metro // Baby Girl Born 2/2/2014

Re: Where do you have visitation?

  • Well, if that's where you choose to have visitation I'm not sure there is much he can do about it.  You are offering.  Sorry if it's not good enough for him.

    Are you SURE you can't get court supervised visitation?  There is a history of violence.  He isn't abusing you physically now because he's 800 miles away but I think he's still manipulating you and abusing you on some level.  If you tell the court you are afraid of him they might work with you. 
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  • I agree with tig, there has got to be a way to get supervised visits with the history he has. I would fight for supervised visits with my BD, because he's a drug peddler and untrustworthy. If that wasn't good enough for the courts then I'd take DD into hiding with me.
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
  • Don't actually go into hiding. That would be very bad. I'm on a few different medications so I'm a little looped.
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
  • HAHA. Wish I could just take her in hiding.

     I am going to push for it, but the atty I had a consult with said pretty much no way, no how. Since the violence occurred years ago and he obviously hasn't been violent towards her, the courts feel people can rehab themselves..esp bc he is a vet with PTSD. It would make life a lot easier if I could get supervised. Guess I'll find out when I finally get a chance to meet with my atty at some point.

    PCOS // Loss 3/2010 // Single Mom // Natural Birth // DC Metro // Baby Girl Born 2/2/2014
  • Excited seems like she has a great idea to do it at a local play group. I wish I knew what to tell you. My daughter's father won't see her at all, so I don't have to worry about it.
    Liliana Seraphina born 9/5/2103


  • I guess my main problem is they will be very specific, structured visits...meaning specific dates and lengths of time since he lives out of state. For example, Jan 18th-Jan 30th. Odds of finding a play group where we can go nearly everyday will be near impossible. I just don't know how people in my situation do it. I just don't and it's beyond frustrating. No way am I the only woman in this country who has an out of state BD who has a history of prior violence and wants to/gets to see his child without supervised visits. UGH! 

    PCOS // Loss 3/2010 // Single Mom // Natural Birth // DC Metro // Baby Girl Born 2/2/2014
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