January 2014 Moms

Seriously DH? So glad it's all about you! - vent

Around 3:15am,DD started her nightly gassy fit. Considering that usually starts at 10pm and continues til 3 or 4 in the morning, I figure this is progress. Hey I actually got some sleep in between feedings. I'm trying to calm her own and help her get he gas out for about 15 minutes when DH says can you take her downstairs I have a really long day tomorrow.  Um, excuse me?

We both have to be up early for a Saturday since I have an appointment with the LC and he's going to pick up my brother from the airport. And yes, DH has to fly his daughter back to San Diego in the evening but really?  He can't offer to help or anything.  He just tells me to come back up when she's settled down. Yeah after almost four weeks, you'd think he'd know our child and realize that this could take hours. Dude, you can try to sleep on the plane plus you're staying overnight in San Diego and will actually get a decent night's sleep.

I get really annoyed because sometimes it feels like he views our daughter as an inconvenience. We agreed to have a child and most of the time we're in this together except when she interferes with his sleep.  I also really need to pump but that's hard to do with a screaming baby.
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Re: Seriously DH? So glad it's all about you! - vent

  • My dh is such a baby when it comes to his sleep. I'm pretty confident he will behave similarly when the baby is born. I'm sorry you have to go through this.
    Charlotte Lynne ~ Jan. 23, 2014

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  • My dh is such a baby when it comes to his sleep. I'm pretty confident he will behave similarly when the baby is born. I'm sorry you have to go through this.

    This. He would pretend to sleep through the cries and such once I got the hang of BF down. Then it was like zero help. He still doesn't get up at night for DS really or me. Unless I can't get out of bed by myself and he's scared ill strain so hard I'll pee the bed or my water will break.
  • I'm very thankful that mike called in a favor to have a friend watch our older son so he could stay with us in the hospital but A) I'm surprised none of the other patients have complained about his snoring and B) he keeps getting pissy when I wake him up to feed the baby. Um hello? 3 post cs here. It still takes me 10 mins to painfully get out of bed - this is why you are here!
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  • What a jerk DH! get it together! In the same boat with you here! I am EBF and so I am the only one waking up with the baby all night. At first I tried to have him change her and burp her so that I would have some help, but he doesn't burp her gently enough for her to stay drowsy for me to put her back to sleep afterwards. Which ended up more work for me anyway.

    On top of that he's only home about 9 days per month and when he is he always comments on how he's tired, or needs a nap, or just doses off on the couch leaving me to both kids by myself. Um. No. If anyone gets to complain about being tired or get a nap it should be me!!!

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  • Exactly what @sugarland726 said!  I'm curious to see how my SO will be after DS is born.  We're all cranky with lack of sleep, but this is 50-50!
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  • I'm sorry he is acting like this, my H was like that with our first baby too. With him gone tonight it may be a nice break from him. You'll be able to look after your sweet baby without the peanut gallery's inconsiderate comments.  
  • My DH turns into a complete a-hole after 11 pm. Like it's not worth it for him to help because he's so mean. I basically resented him for ds1's first year because he offered to give him a pumped bottle periodically but ended up being so mean and such a prima Donna it wasn't worth it. If everything wasn't exactly set up and DS didn't behave perfectly I ended up getting up and doing it myself while he complained. Know how You feel but men can be big babies.
    Lilypie - (7gcp)

    Lilypie - (S3If)

  • My dh tries really hard, but as pp said it's easier if I just do it. Dd and I have been camped out on the couch (her in rnp) and I always say I'll wake you if I need you ( he's sleeping with ds who has bronchitis & a cough - so I actually might be getting better sleep!). I try to let him sleep sun- thurs( he works, I sahm) but weekends are fair game! But when she's fussy- he has to get up and help!!! Hope tonight goes well!
  • Thanks everyone. Like I said, he's usually pretty good. During the week, I do sleep in the living room since he has a commute but honestly weekends should be fair game. He does help during the week if she's super gassy as he seems to have the touch with burping her. I just enjoy sleeping in my own bed and comparatively she wasn't that bad last night. He will also stay up with her so I can get another stretch of sleep.

    I get annoyed easily as he's a second time dad. Granted he wasn't living with his daughter's mom and wasn't there 24/7 but still this shouldn't come as a shock.  Since he went back to work, I've been home with DD and SD. SD is seven but she still needs attention so I don't always get to nap during the day.  I'm super impressed with all you STMs as it's so not easy.

    Fortunately DD passed out around 4:30 and I was able to pump, clean everything, and get her upstairs by 5.  Then she slept til almost 8am. It was really nice to get close to three hours of sleep.
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