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Playgroup is not fun

brachysirabrachysira member
in Preemies
So M goes to a developmental playgroup with preemies.  She does not quality for Early On and is on track or beyond all of her adjusted and most of her birthday milestones.  An Early On person does lead the playgroup, however, and M never impresses her.  M does well at other playgroups, but this one is a little earlier in the day, and she just zones out and bites on a toy the whole time (she is 12.5 months, 10.5 adjusted).  The leader has low expectations for her and does not think she can let go of a toy (she has been doing this for months), speak or babble (she has about 12 words but the person tried to get her to say "mmm" today and M looked at her with her mouth open like she's had a stroke), or cruise (at home she climbs the furniture like a monkey).  M can go get toys by name (today at the group I asked her to get the "Elmo ball" which was a toy they had that we had never discussed or played with before, and she crawled over and brought it to me) and mimic tunes when I sing them and does all kinds of cute stuff.   So I feel bad after going to this group.  The other babies are all either much younger or a few months older and walkers, so she sort of sticks out as behind because she's the only big baby who doesn't walk.  I don't know if we should stay home, if I should just decide not to care if she doesn't impress the teacher, or if I should try to do more explaining about how she does this and that at home.  
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Re: Playgroup is not fun

  • Throw3ksThrow3ks member
    You sound like your uncomfortable there. But is your LO having fun? Even if LO isn't walking or moving around much? Maybe it's to overstimulating at this particular play group. And my thoughts, eff anyone who is going to tell you your baby is this or that. They are not your LOs doctor and have no knowledge of your LO other then that play group.
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  • luvbostonluvboston member
    I would stay home its not worth the aggravation
    6 m/c
    Anovulatory cycles, increased Synthroid Diagnosed Sep 2010
    Natural cycle Dec 2010 BFP M/C 6 1/2 Weeks, D&E Jan 2011
    1 Clomid/Ovidrel BFN May 2011
    Natural cycle Aug 2011 BFP M/C 4 Weeks
    1 IUI Sept 2011 BFP M/c 7 weeks
    Provera Dec 2011 BFP M/C 3 Weeks
    DQ ALPHA HLA MATCH, High NK Cells Diagnosed Dec 2011
    IVF March 2012 BFP m/c 4weeks 5 days (IL, Prednisone)
    IVF#2w/DS July 2012 MEGA FAILURE BFN (IL, Dexamethasone)
    Diagnosed No real HLA Match, DQ Beta Triad, High TNF, Low NK Cells
    Oct 2012 Natural Cycle m/c 4wks (Lovenox, Prednisone) 
    Went to Beer Center- high tnf, low lad, implantation failure
    Nov/Dec 2012 LIT Treatment
    Dec 12 Humira
    Jan 2013 BFP
    Humira,LIT,Prednisone, Lovenox, IVIG, Baby Aspirin
    Miracle Born August 2013 Premature

    Yours doesn't have to be a sad story


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    Lilypie - (ugiy)


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  • brachysirabrachysira member
    Thanks.  I think we'll give it some time.  I really looked forward to going to this group in the fall b/c M was smaller and so it didn't really seem so weird that she just sat around. Plus, she was doing a lot of gross motor developing that semester (she learned to crawl, learned to get into a sitting position, learned to pull up) and the teachers saw so I didn't have to keep saying, no, really, she can do that, really.  The other group like this is in a bad neighborhood, so I am reluctant to switch, and other things we go to are just like random mom get togethers which are hard to plan b/c people are flaky plus there is a lot of illness, so this one is actually pretty good comparatively.  I just wish it was either more mellow about development or more celebratory.  I feel so uncertain when I am like, yes, she can say "meow" and I almost feel like the person thinks I am lying... and then other times, I feel like I am bragging and should be quiet anyway because there are some older babies there who do not do x or y that M just did.  It is just hard to navigate.
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