I might need a muzzle today.

anglndsguse44 · January 2014

I feel like it'll be one of those days where the word vomit comes out of my mouth and I won't be able to stop it.

I was approached by some of my co-workers this morning. They were so excited to let me know that I'm the front runner in their "who will get knocked-up next?" pool they have going in the office. How nice. So, I smiled, faked a laugh, and then found the nearest bathroom to let out a good cry.

I know they probably meant well. I haven't told anyone except my boss about my loss, but still. It hurts.

Now, I most certainly feel my patience crumbling. No one is safe today (except you wonderful ladies).

Ugh. Just when you think you're moving on, someone let's the insensitivity out.

E&B0811 · January 2014

I'm sorry. What a crapy way to start a day.

CallaLily30 · January 2014

I know exactly what you mean. My office is currently a baby factory because there are lots of young people who have recently gotten married.

One of my coworkers who has a son and has recently had 3 losses is pregnant again and CONSTANTLY complaining about the cost of daycare for two kids. I would love to pay for daycare at this point. I wish I had that problem.

megrae12 · January 2014

So sorry sweetie. That sucks monkey balls. ((Hugs))

MoreThanSparrows08 · January 2014

So sorry your day started like that. ((hugs))

rmpar29 · January 2014

I'm so sorry that your day started off that way, and FWIW, you handled it much better than I would have. With the mood I'm in today I probably would've said something to make them feel very horrible. Chin up honey...it's Friday at least.

BookishMomma · January 2014

So sorry. ((Hugs)) People just don't think. Yesterday one of my gossipy co-workers said, "Did you hear the news? So-and-so [other co-worker] is pregnant. 16 weeks. It was an oops--her other kids are older."

I was in a funk about it all day. I kept thinking, I should be either 12 weeks or 6 weeks along, depending on which pregnancy you want to "count." I really don't want to hear about people's "oops" stories right now.

BookishMomma · January 2014

CallaLily30 said:

One of my coworkers who has a son and has recently had 3 losses is pregnant again and CONSTANTLY complaining about the cost of daycare for two kids. I would love to pay for daycare at this point. I wish I had that problem.

It boggles my mind that someone who has had 3 losses would be so unthinking about the impact of what she says.

Unknown · January 2014

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anglndsguse44 · January 2014

@sbg92207 and @CallaLily30 - I am sorry that you're dealing with insensitive co-workers, too. Sometimes people just need to think before they speak. I can't say that I've never said something I should have thought about first, but if anything, this experience has certainly made me so much more sensitive to some of the struggles that others face. ((hugs))

alm288 · January 2014

Oh crap - I'm so sorry! (((Hugs))) Several weeks back I was sent an excel table from DH's coworkers. We are in first place - had no idea this existed!!

peggels24 · January 2014

I think your co-workers need to find a different hobby. And @alm288 I had no idea this was a "thing" either.

I'm sorry you had to deal with that.

Jessy336 · January 2014

I am so sorry! That is terrible way to start the day. I'm sure they didn't mean to be insensitive (especially since they do not know about your loss), but it hurts all the same.

Drgn30 · January 2014

((hugs)) that's really shitty - i'm sorry you were faced with that. and btw, their "pool" is lame.

my coworkers don't know about my loss either. one of them came into my office yesterday to bitch about his new role as "mr mom" to their 3 year-old b/c his pregnant wife was just put onto bedrest. "until you have kids, you just have no idea how much work they are.... can you take some of my work off my plate b/c i just can't be around as much anymore...." thanks, douche.

luciddreamer106 · January 2014

That's a terrible way to start the day. I'm sorry they did that to you.

tumbleweed123 · January 2014

Drgn30 sbg92207 anglndsguse44 I'm so sorry...that is a horrible way to start your day. I would have felt the same way. ((hugs)) I was just in an office waiting for twenty minutes and I just had to listen to the receptionist make a big dramatic complain session about having to take her prenatal vitamin. Uh, I wish I had to take a prenatal vitamin for an actual reason. BLAHHHH!

angelaclev · January 2014

lav17 said:
so sorry, what an awful way to start the day (((hugs)))
I understand that people who don't know about our losses can't really be expected to be sensitive, but it doesn't lessen the pain. My worst moment was when we went out for dinner with my parents and a couple of relatives, and one of the relatives asked "so what do you think about your younger sister having a baby first?" I just about died. My sister was 5 months pregnant and it was only a few weeks after my first m/c. And then I went on to have another one before she gave birth... I never want to talk to them again

I am so sorry you had family say that to you. I just don't understand people.

carlsonbaby2014 · January 2014

Wow. There are no words. Lots of ((((hugs)))). I'm so sorry you had to start your day with that, and I agree with PP that their "pool" is just ridiculous.

tumbleweed123 · January 2014

lav17 i'm so sorry that happened. So horrible. ((hugs))

anglndsguse44 · January 2014

@lav17 - I am so sorry you had to deal with that. That would be hard to take from anyone, but you just don't expect it from family. ((hugs))

@Drgn30 - I am proud of you for not punching him in the face!!

svancura1 · January 2014

Oh I'm so sorry! I hate when people do this. I know I was guilty of it before and now I look back and think how terrible it was to crack jokes like that. I know people mean well but it still hurts all the same. Take time to relax and have chocolate or something comforting. ((hugs))

smcniff · January 2014

So sorry, sounds like an awful way to start your day. In my job I see patients all day, many of them ask me if I have kids yet or if I am planning to. Rather than being sad, I try to be grateful that I have so many people routing for me to have a successful pregnancy. I also tell myself that it could be worse, the midwife at my doctors office had a miscarriage last year, she had to go to work every day and stare pregnancy in the face.