NBR: Birthday Party Etiquette

jstrat53 · January 2014

I am starting a mental plan for DD's birthday party. Being that her birthday is only 2 months after Christmas, she just got a ton of new toys and clothes and doesn't really need anything. I really wanted to have a party because my family doesn't get together too often anymore (everybody is so busy). Also, I just really like having parties. I don't want people to get sick of me having parties cause they don't want to get a gift (my cousins don't have parties for their kids every year). Is there a tactful way to tell people to not worry about gifts? I will be sending invitations, so I was thinking of writing something on the invite.

Jeffreysmom24 · January 2014

I think it is great that you are planning a party for her! I wouldn't mention anything on the invite about gifts though. You could mention it verbally to family and close friends but to be honest, I bet that most will still bring a gift. You could always donate things that you don't need to a church or something like that.

Momarazzi007 · January 2014

I said no gifts on our invites, just to come and have fun. People still brought gifts. I don't think it is bad to put- and I like what Jefferysmom24 said- donate extra stuff, helps out everyone, we did! When she gets a little older we might do Operation Christmas Child party- but hers is late sept so right close to that time of year.

KC1212 · January 2014

I would do it via word of mouth as I'm not sure it is good etiquette to dictate what to buy or not on invite.

But maybe you could get by with something cutesy like " the only " presence" required is yours"

But I told my IRL BFF who is a mom of 3 not to feel obligated to buy a gift so soon after the holidays ( DS was born jan 2nd)

Or PPs have good answers too.

GraceyandTroy · January 2014

I've heard of kids doing fundraiser parties for their birthdays. Telling guests that instead of gifts, please bring a donation to _____ charity and include a little info about the charity and what the goal is to raise from the party. Maybe second bday is too young for that. But I've always thought that was a really cool thing for kids to do.

DS's birthday party is this weekend and we have been asking people to help build his library when they ask what he wants. I figure books are always great to have! We haven't even opened half the toys he got for Christmas, we don't need more!

KC1212 · January 2014

TicketTuesday said:
Yeah, like KC said, we put "your presence is your present!" on DS's invites for his first bday. People still brought them anyway but I didn't feel like anyone was put off by it. Some people are touchy though?

I think it's cute

on invite or otherwise but if you wannna be "formal" about it then, no don't put it on invite.

Amerbutt81 · January 2014

We told people no gifts (monster was born 2 months before Christmas) but people brought them anyway. I usually just put them away and rotate his toys out every three months. This way there 1. isn't a shit ton of toys taking over the house and 2. it's like he's getting new stuff all the time and doesn't get bored.

freakyfast · January 2014

TicketTuesday said:

Yeah, like KC said, we put "your presence is your present!" on DS's invites for his first bday. People still brought them anyway but I didn't feel like anyone was put off by it. Some people are touchy though?

This is what I was going to say.

sailorgal · January 2014

Given it's family, I would just add it to the invite....we used the your presence/presents thing also. Everyone but one brought a gift though (that family brought a handmade card from their son which was terrific). It was too bad as we really just wanted to enjoy everyone's company and I really didn't want my son getting so many new toys. I don't want holidays to be about presents.

Hurley1023 · January 2014

We just got an invite for my bf's kids party and it said in lieu of gifts please bring a non perishable food item for the local food bank. I thought this was a cute idea. My DS bday is a month before Christmas and it is ridiculous how many toys he has, I may do something like this in the future.

jstrat53 · January 2014

Thanks for the suggestions ladies! I like the presence/presents saying! I think I might use that on the invite. I know people will probably still bring a gift but I will feel better having told them it wasn't necessary. I can either donate some toys or just put stuff away for later.

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