Intro and afraid to tell my mgr...

amd1982 · January 2014

hi ladies - new to the board, i have twin 1 year olds and (huuuuge surprise) am expecting baby #3 (and final). I am still early on, only about 8 weeks, so I have not discussed the pregnancy with my manager yet. I did have a conversation with HR, however I don't really feel that confident after our discussion. Hoping to get some support and advice from this board. I am in surgical sales, and work for a very small company that was purchased by a large company within the last six months. Obviously with the birth of the twins last year, I took my full 12 week maternity and then returned to work. Now with this baby, I will essentially need a second maternity leave in less than 2 years. I'm sure that my manager, his boss, and our SVP of sales is not going to be thrilled with this news. And I get it - they need to think of business first. I really do want to keep my job. Unfortunately, with the twins, I had a really complicated pregnancy from 28w until delivery, and my territory definitely suffered a bit. Then this last year (2013) the sales force as a whole had a really crappy year. Only 2 people out of 30 made quota, however for me it was basically like the second year. So, here I am - working my tail off now, and I have some really great deals that are more than likely going to happen. I'm very confident that I'll make my numbers this year, however I'm really scared that my direct manager is going to be really upset and frustrated at my pregnancy. I know they can't directly fire me because I'm pregnant, but I'm afraid that with their fear of the territory being vacant for 3 months, they'll make up something about my numbers not being good and let me go. Can they do this? I'm assuming they can...I don't really know what to do here. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. FWIW, I was considering negotiating with my mgr and telling him I'm willing to take less time off and answer emails/make phone calls as soon as my doctor gives me the green light...
The HR director from my work said something about "only being judged on the 9 months I'm actually in the territory" but I should have clarified if that meant last year or this year. Thanks very much!

Virgo17 · January 2014

First of all, congratulations!

Will you be closing any major deals in the next month or two? I might wait until that happens to disclose your pregnancy. Will you be covered by FMLA? Time taken that is covered under FMLA cannot be a factor when they review your performance.

I would also think about how much time off you think you will need. Could you go back part time after 8 weeks? This isn't something you can answer until after delivery, but it could be part of the discussion with your manager.

jf198400 · January 2014

I don't have any direct advice, but wanted to say you are not alone. There are a lot of moms that have had 2u2. I think you are probably in a better position b/c of your company being acquired by a larger company. I hope that your boss handles the news well, otherwise he's a jerk. Good luck!

cecilyandgautam · January 2014

I can't speak to being evaluated based on sales, but in terms of breaking the news to your boss, the standard tips we give on this board are to go in with a plan: how many weeks you'd like to take off, how your portfolio will be taken care of while you're out, etc. I find the conversation to be less awkward when breaking the news is short & sweet and then I get straight to the logistics of how we'll make it work for the office. It's nice when the boss says congrats but even if s/he doesn't, you shorten the window for having an emotional reaction if you keep the conversation moving, and ideally moving on next steps - looking forward, etc. Being decision and action oriented should help keep the conversation professional and productive.

iverske9 · January 2014

I am in technical science sales as well so I understand feeling it is more of a burden than a blessing sometimes. I love my job and while I am not having 2u2 I did take a new position with a big company but feel like after the 6 months I have been cultivating relationship all of a sudden it will be on hold. My boss has actually been great but I feel myself like I am going to miss out on the momentum.

I will say I have to step back and realize it is a job and your family needs to come first. In the end your family is what will be there for you while a job has no loyalty. So congrats and just go in with a sound plan and kick ass before you go that they will be dying for you to come back as opposed to letting you go.

VegasGal1978 · January 2014

Congrats! I don't have much advice other than suggestions that you not make promises to come back early. You may decide that motet time is needed once your LO arrives. It's better to under-promise and over-deliver instead of the reverse.

litzo27 · January 2014

Lots of good advice above already. I agree with sitting tight on the news for a month more or so, especially if you are likely to close some nice deals in that time. Also it's just always prudent to wait to the end of the first tri I think. In your conversation be short and sweet - don't apologize for being pregnant again - your body/family/right. Just focus on how well this year is going, how much time you plan to take off, what you plan to do to prepare for that and how you suggest they cover your territory when you are going.
Lastly, just to be prudent I would get documentation together on all your numbers for the past year and for this one. Also keep documentation of all your conversations/interactions on this topic. If you are concerned they will try to misrepresent your numbers it's good to have your own documented support.

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