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April 2014 Moms
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I knew this would bite me in the butt *\rant*

KumoriKumori member
in April 2014 Moms
Sorry its a baby shower rant, something I've been trying to avoid complaining about. Originally I wasn't going to have a baby shower and I am extremely grateful that I am having one thrown for me, but oh boy is this going to be the death of me. My hostesses are my mother, step-mother and future MIL and doesn't that sound like a lovely combo to have? Actually they have been working together quite nicely and it is my step-dad making problems! My step-mother has the best job, must be nice being a dentist, and is reserving the location for my shower and she is trying for an inexpensive, yet lovely, place. The cabin we found in our metro parks area is all booked and now trying for an absolutely GORGEOUS one near our city so she wants to do that. We all agreed that for $100 the cabin that is has a deck, a fireplace, all the tables and chairs, a kitchen, indoor bathrooms and fits over 90 people would be perfect! That is so much cheaper than anywhere else and we get it a whole day, the owners of the cabin even take care of the cleaning and trash. All three moms are going to split the cost in three to pay and my step-mom is willing to pay for most of everything else that is needed for the party, but I guess for my step-dad that still isn't good enough. He is trying to talk my mom into fighting with the other two that we should look for a different place. My mom told him no that this fits all our intended guests and is the same price as the grungy bingo hall he keeps insisting we rent. He is just wanting to start a fight between my mom and step-mom because my mom and dad got a divorce when she was 18! I am not about to have a damn fight start because of his petty jealousy, I'm not separating my child's parties in the future so he needs to get over this. I'll pay the stupid $33 for the cabin if he doesn't want to.

Sorry its so long, I'm a hormonal mess and crying so these are all my thoughts. Appreciate letting me get this out.  image
June A14 siggy challenge: Best TV Dad
Maes Hughes- FMA
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Re: I knew this would bite me in the butt *\rant*

  • Jesster11Jesster11 member

    Well, kudos for your mom and step-mom getting along and working together on this, but you are right.  Your step-dad needs to get over it.  Have you talked to him (or your mom if you aren't that close to him) about it?  I would even go as far as what you mentioned about not separating holidays and explain to him that if he wants to be involved, than he needs to act like an adult.  This is about you and your baby, and not him.  And good for your mom for standing up to your step-dad about it.

    I understand the family dynamics (both DH and my parents are divorced... my mom is remarried and his dad is remarried), and holidays scare me.  I plan to invite all the grandparents to Christmas morning.  Luckily, my mom and dad can act reasonable around each other, but after our wedding (when drunk FIL and his wife mouthed off to MIL - luckily not at our venue) I don't want them in the same room.  They all live across the country though, so I don't expect them to all be down visiting at the same time.  At least I hope not!

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  • KumoriKumori member
    I've talked to him and he just turned up the T.V. to drown me out. What ever don't see your grandchild, you owe me over $1000 still from when you were in the hospital and I used every penny of pay checks to pay for it.
    June A14 siggy challenge: Best TV Dad
    Maes Hughes- FMA
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  • csmily51csmily51 member
    OMG I'm sorry.  I'm super happy for you though, that your Mom, Step-Mom and MIL are getting along for your sake.  I'm dreading my baby shower.  MIL gets along with both, all no problems lol, my mom and Step-Mom don't see eye to eye, which I understand now that I'm older.  My DH cousin is throwing our baby shower, and both my Mom and SM are going to be there...EEK!!!

    If you need to pull your Step-Dad aside, I'd do it.  I'd let Mom know you're going to, then just do it and be like this is what's happening, if there is an issue than I will pay for it and that is the end.  I don't care what you're problem is, it's not about you.  Everyone needs to get along, you don't have to like each other, but you need to be cordial and act like adults.  He'll probably respect it more coming from you, than your mom, unless she's told you and shouldn't have, in which she needs to address the issue.  Either way, good luck, I feel your pain/stress!
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  • KatieGummowKatieGummow member
    Stressful!
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  • kwolslagerkwolslager member
    uhh.. why does he care? this shower has absolutely nothing to do with him. If I were you I'd call him up and tell him to back the f- off... but that's just me. It's completely rude and uncalled for to make this about his problems and it's doing nothing but adding stress. I'd give him hell about it if I were you.. but then again I'm not a very passive person.

    image  mean_girls_35345

    DD1- 2009, M/C- 2011, M/C- 2012, DD2- 2012, DD3- 2014

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