Trying to focus on the joy of this pregnancy

ewhitney01 · January 2014

This is my first time ever writing on any of these boards, but I am hoping to find some comfort from other women who are now pregnant after experiencing a loss. My husband and I became pregnant surprisingly after our wedding, and as quickly as the joy found us we found out my hcg levels weren't doubling and I miscarried. We became pregnant the very next month, and the same sequence of events occurred. We are now pregnant again almost 3 months later and although I received a positive hcg report, because I'm only 5 weeks along I'm still so scared that even though the hcg doubled I still will miscarry. I'm trying my best to focus on the fact that I'm pregnant today, but I keep finding that my mind wanders to negative thoughts about this pregnancy. Can anyone give me support on what they have done in similar situations? Thanks-

ksulli · January 2014

So sorry for your losses & a huge congrats on this pregnancy. I found my best days early on were the ones that I was able to live with the risk, and know that there is nothing I can do to change the outcome of this pregnancy, so in the meantime I should enjoy it. I hope this is it for you & you stick around for 9 boring months. Good luck!

almostamissus · January 2014

Honestly, I just fell pregnant immediately following a loss in nov and it's hard. Really hard. I did go to see an obgyn early because my betas weren't doubling and he put me on progesterone to try and hold this pregnancy. Might be worth a phone call?? Other than that I try to relax. I pray. Like a lot. And I also use different mantras... Like "my body is strong and healthy and helping my baby grow." It helps when I feel anxiety. I hope we are both here for a long time!! Congrats!!!

SandSunBliss · January 2014

I found a lot of strength in my mantras.

If there will be a time to mourn, there will be a time to mourn, but that time is not today. Today is to celebrate!

Worry doesn't help tomorrow's trouble, but it does ruin today's happiness.

Congratulations on your pregnancy

JAW2 · January 2014

Congrats on your BFP!

I've had such a range of emotions from feeling worried it would be taken from me again, excited, stressed and calm. It's crazy having PgAL brain sometimes but I think the best thing is to allow yourself all those thoughts. It's hard to prevent yourself from worrying about what could happen but remember that today you are pregnant. You cannot jinx yourself or make yourself un-preganant by doing or not doing something. We're here for you.

Ps- I love SandSunBliss's mantras!! =D>

Samuelismomma · January 2014

Congrats! I too try to tell myself mantras and bible versus. I also take slow, deep breaths when I start feeling the pgal anxiety...I say peace move in....fear move out...hope you have a h&h 9 months:)

Serenla · January 2014

Congratulations on your BFP!
The best advice I can give you is you are going to have good days and bad days and the early days are difficult. Try to enjoy your good days and repeat a mantra during the bad (((hugs)))

MommaAshley12 · January 2014

So sorry for your losses. Congrats on this pregnancy. I think the previous ladies had some great advice. Try to take it one day at a time. Big (((hugs)))

Skeemer · January 2014

I'm very very sorry for your loss experience.

Congrats on your pregnancy! You're among friends here & we've all experienced good days, great days, hard days & sad days. This board has been a life saver for me. It's heartbreaking knowing that loss brings us all together here but it's heart healing knowing that these women have walked in my shoes & are truly here for me. These precious souls have put their cyber arms around me on the worst days of fear & anxiety & have celebrated with me on the best days.

I would recommend just to be honest & bare your soul on the days you need to. This gives you the best opportunity to find support here. I was scared to ask what I considered dumb questions or to tell the ladies here that I didn't "feel pregnant" but when I did I discovered that they've all had those days too so they were quick to offer hugs & reassurance. You're going to find a lot of great people here that will become your friends.

As others have said, my methods of coping are to pray, read the Bible & speak positive things over my child. As a practicing Christian, I rely a lot on the comfort of the Lord. Hope some of this helps you. Pull up a chair & join us.

kstar83 · January 2014

So I like to let myself be sad on days that I am. It doesn't take away from this child that I am still carrying. I lost one, and it is sad, and that is OK. It does get easier as time goes on, and I like keeping myself busy with projects and just things. Usually reading and researching helps me when attempting a new and challenging task, but in this case less is more for me.

Deep breaths and taking care of yourself is all you can do right now. And also know that there are more ladies than you think going through this everyday. You are not alone.

ewhitney01 · January 2014

In tears reading all of your words of comfort. Thank you-

2redtulips · January 2014

I also have several mantras that I repeat to myself, and distraction is also key.

I have a mini celebration each week when my ticker changes over to a new week. Really, one week at a time is how I am approaching this pregnancy.

Congrats on your BFP, and fingers crossed for you to have a happy and healthy 9 months.

BellanieNJ · January 2014

First, congratulations!

We can certainly all identify -- the fear and doubt that comes with PGAL is tough. I've found that focusing on small victories really helps keep PGAL brain awayay. It forces me to focus on the here-and-now. So every bloodwork result, every good weigh-in or even a day when I am super-disciplined with my diet and exercise is something that I'm proud to have accomplished on this journey.

Good luck!

ewhitney01 · January 2014

So good news... my hcg is now at 3300!!!! Things seem different this time around. The for all the support!!

jlworden710 · January 2014

Awesome news! Congrats on great levels! So today you celebrate

JenniferAnn1972 · January 2014

Great news! Like the others have said, I've found that keeping busy is helping me a lot. I was so exhausted last week I took a personal day just to sleep in & get my head on straight, but it was my worst day of worrying. I try to think of this like any other situation where things are not guaranteed (the rest of life!!!). Worrying about a bad outcome doesn't change anything, it just makes you unhappy and that's a big waste of energy. I wish I could say I've perfected it!! I will admit I've been more cautious this time around- like resisting the urge to buy a huge box of decaf k-cups at Costco today

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