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June 2014 Moms
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Speaking of showers

lellyminelellymine member
edited January 2014 in June 2014 Moms
My dad's family is at war with each other right now, it's a big mess over my grandfather's estate. We're like the non murdering version of the Hatfields & McCoys right now. There are 5 aunts including my mother and they and their daughters have all picked sides. Anyways, two aunts have offered to give me showers but they won't do one together and I know they'll be obnoxiously competitive with each other about the showers and try to one up the other. Would you accept both offers and just your best to stay out of the middle or decline both offers?
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Re: Speaking of showers

  • ElTrain5ElTrain5 member
    I had something similar with my bridal shower...we just did two showers, it worked out very nicely. Just make sure you deny all knowledge of the specifics of either shower, and afterwards don't talk one up more than the other.  Just say they were "very lovely, had a wonderful time". 

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  • babygabe614babygabe614 member

    Ugh, yikes. We have a bit of a similar situation with DH's side of the family. His Dad/Stepmother refuse to have anything to do with his late mother's side of the family, so the shower that my mom is throwing will have everyone from both sides invited, but my sMIL will not attend and will likely throw a mini one of her own and just invite her sister and my future SIL (BIL's gf) because sMIL can't possibly act like an adult for a couple hours and just attend the "real" shower my mom is throwing. /end rant

    I think if you can pull it off the way @ElTrain5 suggested, it will be fine. It would suck to decline both and then not have a shower at all just because your family decided to go BSC on each other.

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  • fferreiralynnfferreiralynn member
    Decline both. My stepmother is throwing mine. The downside is that she doesn't want my stepdad to go. I want him to go more than anything so this may be a deal breaker. A little backstory. My stepdad and my stepmom were married 18 years ago. My mom and stepdad had an affair and fell in love. So out of spite my dad tracked down my stepmom and they had an affair. After the divorce they both remarried each others partner. It's no hatfield and McCoy but it's Wife Swap. Lol. Anyway it's been 18 years and they are all still angry about it. They all played nice for my wedding I don't know why the babyshower is any differnt.
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  • Ladybird2014Ladybird2014 member
    Don't let their problems become your problem. I would have both showers...your aunts love you and want to do something nice for you let them. If you can manage to try to separate the family issues from the shower. Let everyone know upfront you love them both but you will not engage in foolishness and drama.

    Estate problems are the worst...people get insane over money and property.
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  • lellyminelellymine member
    Family politics suck so bad! My parents aren't much help because they're involved in the battle with his brothers and their wives.
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  • tbmadeamistaketbmadeamistake member

    That depends, will playing them off against each other end in better presents?  JK. 

    That really sucks, I'm sorry.  I would probably accept both and just be brutally honest with them about not being put in the middle. 

    Married DH 7/30/11

    CSC arrived 5/7/12 

    CHC arrived 6/2/14

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  • MrsCase1MrsCase1 member
    I would take a shower from anyone who wanted to give one. Seems like each side can pick one to attend. Not fair to punish your baby for their argument so why should you be deprived of a shower? The more the merrier!
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  • Neuron79Neuron79 member
    I'd skip them both and see if there might be a friend as a possible contender. I can't stand drama.
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