Job Offer - 7 weeks pregnant, When in the process do I tell the employer?

KUGirl09 · January 2014

I have a bit of a unique circumstance, and I am really torn about it. I moved to Rural Kansas about 2 years ago, where I got a job in my career field, but not in the exact position (or organization) I wanted. Rural Kansas doesn't exactly have a lot of job opportunities, but my husband found his dream job here, so we moved. I've done very well and work for a County Wide Economic Development organization that only has 2 staff. I recently found out I'm pregnant (7 weeks), and my boss has been very supportive of me doing what is needed for my family, even suggesting that I can have my child come to work with me for the first 6 months.

However, one of the Cities in the County just decided they want an Assistant City Manager (my dream job), and have asked me if I would consider taking the job. This is obviously early on in the process, and they would have to still create the job description, post publicly, formal interview, etc. The City Manager however is very set on me taking the job, and has indicated that the salary would be double what I get now, but I would have to move to their town (20 minutes away).

I'm torn for 2 reasons. First, I don't know when to tell them that I am pregnant. Their maternity leave and family/life balance policy would be big issues for me and I would want to know more about those benefits, but I can't ask those questions unless they know I'm pregnant. Its a smaller town, so its not like I can hide this forever, and I would still have to work with them if I don't take that job (in my current job) so I can't burn any bridges or show that I am untrustworthy. Second, I happen to have grown to love my current job and the flexibility that having only 2 staff and a small office affords. However, there is ZERO chance of job growth here, and its very unlikely that I'll ever make more than 50K here, even if i work here for 10 years. I feel that I owe it to myself to pursue my career goals of eventually becoming a city manager, but I am feeling torn between the whole family/life thing and career. How on earth do I approach this?

jf198400 · January 2014

It sounds like it will take them several weeks to post the job, interview, etc before they make you an official offer. I would wait until they make the offer, and then tell them you are pregnant. You will then be able to ask all of your questions and negotiate ML as part of your job offer. It sounds like you really want this job, so I would go for it. Fwiw, your current job may be flexible, but taking baby to work with you sounds like an awful idea. Also if it is such a small staff, it may cause problems when you have to take time off for LO being sick, daycare closed, etc.

Good luck!

Maybride2 · January 2014

Don't say anything until you are officially given an offer letter. Saying something now, when the job is still just a hypothetical (they haven't even created the position, right?) is pointless.

KUGirl09 · January 2014

Thank you all so much! I'll definitely wait till an official offer letter is presented. This is my first time preggo, etc. so I am really out of my depth here. Now I just hope my current boss, who is friends with the potential new boss can keep his mouth shut for a few more weeks. Ahh rural life, where everyone knows everything about everyone.

sweetz_cj · January 2014

I am so glad I found this feed! I am in the process of interviewing for two different jobs and am 12 weeks along. My current employer doesn't know yet, and we are even holding off telling extended family so word of mouth/social media doesn't inhibit any potential offers. I look forward to how you share your experience and will dot beat to provide feedback...if there is a job offer.

KUGirl09 · January 2014

I'll keep ya posted! My current boss is out sick today, so I can't talk to him about it till tomorrow. I have to get back to the Potential Boss by the end of the week, so fingers crossed!

Carnation77 · January 2014

I personally view interviews as a two-way street. They're trying to figure out if they want to hire you, and you're trying to figure out if you want to work for them. So I think you should ask about work/life balance. You don't have to tell them you're pregnant, but if you're interested in having a family and will want some flexibility to do that then I think it's probably in everyone's best interest to be up front about that. You want to know if they think supporting families is important or an imposition. It will go a long way to making you either miserable or happy if you get the job.

Yes, I do realize it could affect their hiring decision. But do you really want to work for someone who won't hire you because they know you want to have a family? Chances are they'd be a jerk to work for anyway - especially if you're looking for more flexibility once the child is born.

I was in a similar situation (2 months pregnant) before I took my current position and just flat up told them I was pregnant and asked if that was going to create any problems. They said no and have been extremely supportive and have given me tons of flexibility in hours/leave.

iverske9 · January 2014

I would wait and go through the interview process. I actually went through a similar thing. I applied for a great job and the interview process took forever! I was actually 11 weeks pregnant when I finally got an official offer. I did not reveal the pregnancy at all as it was my second child and I knew I would come back, etc.

So I negotiated and accepted the offer and then spoke to my pregnancy. I of course by not revealing it would not be qualified for Maternity Leave so my husband and I discussed the pro's and cons of the job. We realized long term success and money was worth the hit I would take in maternity leave.

Good luck!

sweetz_cj · January 2014

I did get the offer and brought up the pregnancy after the offer was made. The hiring manager stated it was not an ideal situation which leads me to believe I wouldn't have received an offer had they known before. But, I couldn't hold off on the news as it would seem more like a problem the longer I kept it a secret.

I'm one for open communication and willing to work part time from home during my shortened leave. But we are both (myself and new employer) making sacrifices, so in the long run, I don't anticipate too many problems.

MommaP12 · January 2014

I interviewed at 5 months pregnant and accepted at 6 months pregnant.

During my interview and the process, I never said a word about being pregnant and then when the offer was made I said on the phone to them when I called back to accept it "I'm really excited about starting and looking forward to joining the team. Since I'm expecting in September I'll just need to know who to reach out to regarding time off I'll need." It was something very close to that. Good luck!

MommaP12 · January 2014

I interviewed at 5 months pregnant and accepted at 6 months pregnant.

During my interview and the process, I never said a word about being pregnant and then when the offer was made I said on the phone to them when I called back to accept it "I'm really excited about starting and looking forward to joining the team. Since I'm expecting in September I'll just need to know who to reach out to regarding time off I'll need." It was something very close to that. Good luck!

Want a personalized experience?

Job Offer - 7 weeks pregnant, When in the process do I tell the employer?

Re: Job Offer - 7 weeks pregnant, When in the process do I tell the employer?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards