~~June Check-In (BFP Warning) ~~

jbasore1123 · January 2014

Hi Ladies, I hope you are all having a great week!

BFP warning on the bottom. Please skip if you are having a bad day

This is a weekly check-in for women who have suffered the loss of an angel with an EDD in June, no matter what the year. You are welcome to join us, just post an intro including your EDD and the information below:

Where are you in your TTCAL journey/cycle, etc? Any updates/appointments you'd like to share?

Good luck to all of you!!

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QOTW: In honor of the Goldon Globes this past weekend, if you watched it, who (in your opinion) was the best dressed? Worst dressed?

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June Bugs:

@HelloSweetie1 6/21/2013 ~ I’m so sorry for the BFN and that AF showed ((hugs)). How are you feeling about talking to an RE? Have you found any clinics that you are interested in?

@rmpar29 6/26/13 ~ How did everything go on Saturday? Hopefully the pain wasn’t too bad. Did your doc give you any insight into whether you’re ovulating? Are you going to go ahead with the Femera?

@uneek13236/29/13 ~ As usual, hey lady. Hope you’re doing well this week. Anything new?

@Ashris13 6/1/14 ~ How’s the 2WW going? When is your beta? FX for you!

@peggels24 6/4/2014 ~ I’m sorry your DH is a bit overhelmed with TTC. It can really take a toll. Have you been able to BD EOD the way you hoped? Any signs that you’ve O’d? FX for great timing!

@MrsG80inTN 6/7/2014 ~ I’m so sorry to see that AF showed but it looks like your LP was a little longer. That’s a good sign! How are you doing ((hugs))? What’s the plan for this cycle?

@Waliany2015 6/8/2014 ~ I’m so sorry AF showed and you were in so much pain ((hugs)). What’s the plan- will you try again this cycle or break until the wedding? And congrats on sending out the STDs! And I love that you’re shopping at Brides for Breasts Cancer, that’s amazing. When you find a dress, please send us a pic!

@lily9911 6/9/2014 ~ We missed you last week. Welcome to the check-in, I’m so sorry for your loss. How are you doing this week? When do(did) you expect O?

@classicstar28 6/10/2014 ~ I’m so sorry to see that AF showed like you thought she would ((hugs)). That’s great your car payments got lowered, every little bit helps! And have you finally heard back about the pre-approval?

@sgio7484 6/10/14 ~ I’m sorry to hear about your dad. How is he doing this week?

@racegurl87 6/11/2014 ~ Do you think you ended up O’ing like you thought? Hopefully your timing was good. And it’s good that you and your husband are trying to take everything as relaxed as you can. Temping can really get overwhelming and control your life.

@Wino411 6/14/2014 ~ I’m sorry you’re struggling. I’m coming up on a year as well so I know how frustrating and depressing that can be ((hugs)). Don’t lose hope! Where are you in your cycle?

@mlt13 6/15/2014 ~ Welcome to the check-in, I’m so sorry for your loss and that things are taking so long to return to normal. Does your doctor think AF will return soon after hcg is 0?

@lanilanz11 6/20/14 ~ I’m glad your hcg is falling. How are the shots and the BCP? Any side effects?

@noonandj04 6/22/2014 ~ We missed you the last 2 weeks. I’m glad you are starting to feel better. When are you getting back on that horse?

@GLB30 6/26/2014 ~ We missed you the last 2 weeks. Did you figure out if you are doing the testing this month or next?

@angelaclevenger 6/28/2014 ~ Again, I’m sorry you’re struggling lately, but I’m glad to hear that your husband is being supportive. Do you have anything planned for your loss date next month or are you just trying to survive it?

If your name is missing from above, please let me know and post an update. Some are not included as we have not heard from you in many weeks.

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If you get a BFP, you can PM me before you leave for PgAL so I know you've left and we can congratulate you here.

Congratulations to @yurizaba on your BFP! We wish you a healthy and happy 9 months!

rmpar29 · January 2014

@rmpar29 6/26/13 ~ How did everything go on Saturday? Hopefully the pain wasn’t too bad. Did your doc give you any insight into whether you’re ovulating? Are you going to go ahead with the Femera?

Hey JB! Thanks for the check-in. How're your stims going???

My appointment on Saturday went well and I didn't really have pain, just a lot of cramping. Good news is that my ute and one tube are clear and look good. He said since I have long cycles and don't ovulate until CD20-25 that we can try a medicated cycle, so I start Femara today...hopefully. Long story short, the fertility pharmacy didn't have all of the meds that my doc prescribed (HCG trigger, Crinone, etc) so they couldn't deliver my RXs until tomorrow. They tried to transfer the RX, but the new pharmacy had to wait until yesterday to call my doctor to get a new RX. They finally did that (after yet another call from me) and then they didn't have it in stock. It SHOULD be there today, and I hope that it is, for their sakes! I start taking it today and then I go back Monday to check the follies and go from there. He doesn't think I'm ovulating, or at least, ovulating mature eggs. I'm getting a temp shift every month, so it would appear that I am, but maybe I'm having weak ovulation. Since I only have one side with plumbing he wants a couple mature follies on that side to increase our chances. If Femara doesn't work then he will add in a low dose of Gonal-F. I'm hoping that we don't have to go that far, but we shall see.

QOTW - I don't watch Golden Globes, or any of those red carpet events. I'm not really all that interested in celebrities and don't really care who wins what.

ETA: Forgot to send congrats to @yurizaba! Wishing you a H&H 9 months on PGAL!

FishyMom · January 2014

I have been a very bad bumpie.. The 2ww is driving me crazy! My DH has been out of town so I have been off the wall. But I feel nothing.. No cramps, no twinges.. Nothing so I am sure when I test tomorrow it will be a BFN.

peggels24 · January 2014

Congratulations @yurizaba!

@jbasore1123 Good morning – thanks for the check-in!

QOTW – I didn’t watch but I will get to look at the red carpet pics sometime today hopefully (didn’t get around to it yesterday).

@peggels24 6/4/2014 ~ I’m sorry your DH is a bit overhelmed with TTC. It can really take a toll. Have you been able to BD EOD the way you hoped? Any signs that you’ve O’d? FX for great timing!

DH seemed much more on board this weekend – I think he just thought that it would be super easy to get KU after the MC – meanwhile he didn’t realize that I was making a much more concerted effort when we were TTC prior to the pregnancy. We were only able to make it work on Saturday L but that’s ok. I’m not sure when I O’d but hopefully it was somewhere around Sunday or Monday J

Otherwise, not much going on – just waiting now for AF or a BFP – I’ll probably test on the 27^th because AF should be here around the 26^th. Unless my friend wants to go out for her bday on the 25^th, then I’ll have to go ahead and test that day just to be safe.

@rmpar29 Good luck with the Femara.

@ashris13 ((hugs)) and good luck tomorrow. The TWW is the worst!

peggels24 · January 2014

@glb30 Thanks!

MrsG80inTN · January 2014

@jbasore1123 – how are you doing? Where are you at in your cycle/process?

I’m doing ok – thanks. This weekend was really hard. Lots of factors, but there were some big ugly cries. This process bites. Oh how I look forward to all of us getting BFPs soon. I did have a longer LP, I’m thankful for that and hoping that it’s a good sign. This cycle we are going to just keep trying… I’m on metformin and so I’ll stick with that. I am going to see my doc this week for a regular check-up and to talk about seeing an RE. I’m also in process of scheduling a check-up with my endocrinologist to check my thyroid levels as I think they might be off. So, we shall see.

QOTW – I watched a little of the globes, but not enough to make an impact J

@rmpar29 – Sorry you’re having a rough time with the prescriptions. Hoping that the Femara does the trick for you!

@ashris13 – the 2WW is hard. I’m hoping you get a + instead of what you are expecting. FX for you.

@peggels24 – I love that our DH’s are so positive and don’t realize half of the things we do J I’m hoping you had good timing.

@GLB30 – welcome back J You’re not the worst – promise. Good luck with the testing.

peggels24 · January 2014

@mrsg80intn ((hugs)) for a bad weekend.

rmpar29 · January 2014

@Ashris13 - FX for you!

@peggels24 - We do so much behind the scenes...I don't think my DH has any idea how much I plan and test to try to get a BFP. I'm glad that he's feeling better about the process.

@GLB30 - I feel like I should know this, but what testing?

@MrsG80inTN - (((HUGS))) I hope that your appointment goes well and that you can get in to see an RE soon.

Wino411 · January 2014

Today's not a good one! Had to take the day off for a mental health day. Was really hopeful about this cycle, I had alot of the same symptoms as my first loss but alas a BFN this morning, which means I'm officially moving on to my 13th month TTC with nothing to show for it besides 2 losses...

I've cried way too many times today. I was trying to be strong and stay hopeful the past few months but I'm literally falling apart these days. Please keep me in your T&Ps.

My RE agreed to give me 3 more refills of Femara last month and said if I weren't pregnant I'd have to come in for a follow-up and a new plan. One month down and I'm already ready for the new plan. I just don't think I can do this for another 2 months. My DH is the best and keeps trying to encourage me but TTC has become emotionally exhausting. I don't know exactly what the next steps would be but to be quite honest, I just want to do an IUI just for the sake of trying something new. I just feel like what we're doing clearly isn't working, why bother to keep putting myself through it. This is probably just the BFN talking, I'm always down in the dumps until a new cycle starts and I'm filled with hope once again only to be let down... please forgive my sad ranting.

rmpar29 · January 2014

@Wino411 - Huge (((HUGS))) Why won't your doctor try anything new? Are you getting enough follicles with Femara?

donnamartingraduates93 · January 2014

@wino411 - I am SO sorry. Sending so many hugs your way.

Wino411 · January 2014

rmpar29 said:

@Wino411 - Huge (((HUGS))) Why won't your doctor try anything new? Are you getting enough follicles with Femara?

Thanks. She's done some testing and bloodwork after the 2nd loss and couldn't find anything wrong. So I guess she thought it was only a matter of time before we were successful. I honestly don't know about the follicles. They've only checked (in the past) that i was ovulating on the femara. No checking follicles though... I'll definitely bring it up though, thanks.

rmpar29 · January 2014

Wino411 said:

rmpar29 said:

@Wino411 - Huge (((HUGS))) Why won't your doctor try anything new? Are you getting enough follicles with Femara?

Thanks. She's done some testing and bloodwork after the 2nd loss and couldn't find anything wrong. So I guess she thought it was only a matter of time before we were successful. I honestly don't know about the follicles. They've only checked (in the past) that i was ovulating on the femara. No checking follicles though... I'll definitely bring it up though, thanks.

Wow, I'm very surprised that they aren't checking for follicle size and quantity. This is my first round with Femara, but I have to go back for an u/s on the 6th day to check for follicle count and size to make sure that the Femara is working and is the right dose. Just because you are ovulating doesn't guarantee that they are mature follicles. I would definitely ask about more monitoring and an IUI. Has DH been checked out?

Have you gotten a second opinion? Maybe I'm spoiled with a fantastic RE, but I'm really questioning the lack of monitoring from this RE. Maybe it's time to try someone new?

Wino411 · January 2014

rmpar29 said:

Wino411 said:

rmpar29 said:

@Wino411 - Huge (((HUGS))) Why won't your doctor try anything new? Are you getting enough follicles with Femara?

Thanks. She's done some testing and bloodwork after the 2nd loss and couldn't find anything wrong. So I guess she thought it was only a matter of time before we were successful. I honestly don't know about the follicles. They've only checked (in the past) that i was ovulating on the femara. No checking follicles though... I'll definitely bring it up though, thanks.

Wow, I'm very surprised that they aren't checking for follicle size and quantity. This is my first round with Femara, but I have to go back for an u/s on the 6th day to check for follicle count and size to make sure that the Femara is working and is the right dose. Just because you are ovulating doesn't guarantee that they are mature follicles. I would definitely ask about more monitoring and an IUI. Has DH been checked out?

Have you gotten a second opinion? Maybe I'm spoiled with a fantastic RE, but I'm really questioning the lack of monitoring from this RE. Maybe it's time to try someone new?

Nope, no monitoring. DH has been checked though. I really appreciate this though. It's much more helpful advice than the "just relax" friends and family offer. I'll talk to my RE about the monitoring or the possibility that the follicles aren't mature. If she's not on board about being a bit more active in this with me, I'll find another one!

Waliany2015 · January 2014

I found my dress!! I tried on about 15 dresses in two hours. It was crazy. Miss Oregon Plus Size was at the event and was so sweet and supportive. I was able to get a beautiful dress for about 60% off and my money went to breast cancer research, is a tax deduction and I did not have to pay sales tax! I had a great weekend with my mom involving lots of wine!
I'm still so torn on weather to wait or not to TTC. There are a lot of things to figure out like how my dress would fit and flying on my honeymoon. I'm also concerned about having another loss before the wedding. I just don't know what to do. In the big picture waiting 5 months isn't very long but it also seems like forever...

Here is a pic of my dress and one of my mom and on my fiancé's fire truck

donnamartingraduates93 · January 2014

@waliany2015: Congrats!!! That is awesome, and you look stunning

MrsG80inTN · January 2014

@wino411 – Hugs. I sent you a PM…

@racegurl87 – FX for good timing and a quick 2WW!

@waliany2015 – yay for a dress!!!!!! You look beautiful!!! Sounds like it was a successful even all around!!! I understand your concerns about TTC. I can’t remember how long you all have been trying or how old you are, but if you feel ok about waiting that is what I’d personally do b/c then you can relax while planning and truly enjoy your wedding and honeymoon. However, that's just me personally and you have to make a decision that is right for you and your fiance.

Waliany2015 · January 2014

Thank you @lanilanz

@racegurl87 at first he said to go ahead and he didn't mind if I was pregnant. Then when we changed the honeymoon to Paris he changed his mind. Now he says either way is fine. It's so hard to get a straight answer out of him!! I know he wants me to be able to sip wine with him but he also wants a baby. I think in leaning more towards waiting

rmpar29 · January 2014

@Waliany2015 - Your dress is beautiful! Only you know what the right answer is for you. I would be nervous to travel while pregnant, but if you are fine with it then go for it!

peggels24 · January 2014

Waliany2015 said:

I found my dress!! I tried on about 15 dresses in two hours. It was crazy. Miss Oregon Plus Size was at the event and was so sweet and supportive. I was able to get a beautiful dress for about 60% off and my money went to breast cancer research, is a tax deduction and I did not have to pay sales tax! I had a great weekend with my mom involving lots of wine! I'm still so torn on weather to wait or not to TTC. There are a lot of things to figure out like how my dress would fit and flying on my honeymoon. I'm also concerned about having another loss before the wedding. I just don't know what to do. In the big picture waiting 5 months isn't very long but it also seems like forever... Here is a pic of my dress and one of my mom and on my fiancé's fire truck

Your dress is absolutely beautiful! Yay for finding one!

Waliany2015 · January 2014

@MrsG80inTN I am 28 and MF is 32. We got it on the first try. This has been such a journey. When I told my parents we were pregnant and planning a wedding in 2015. My stepmom told me if I have a baby first I no longer deserve a wedding. Then after the MC we decided to get married this summer instead of next. Now my stepmom is all about a "proper" wedding and making wedding planning difficult. For some reason I feel guilty for not trying, I can't really explain where that is coming from and I just feel sad.

classicstar28 · January 2014

jbasore1123 for the check-in today.

I was disappointed when my temp dropped down, but then I was actually thankful when AF showed because spotting for that long was unusual for me. Sad, but thankful. She's gone now so I'm back to waiting for O. I expect it to be in about a week or so. In the meantime, I will try to relax and focus on all the interviews I got this week. First one is actually in a couple of hours! And of course on the house stuff.

We are getting closer to the pre-approval for the mortgage. We submitted an official application yesterday so we should hear back in a few days. The application is for a different kind of loan than we were originally looking at (the FHA loan). I think it would be better for us in the short term to do the FHA since we will refinance once we qualify for a regular loan. But, we don't know. Neither of us knows much about the financial world. DH is talking to one his coworkers who's background is in finance about what would really be better for us. I'm hoping we'll have it all finished by the beginning of February. Who knew this process would be this long? We started it in November.

MrsG80inTN · January 2014

@Waliany2015 – I know this is easier said than done, but don’t feel guilty for making a decision one way or the other. Both your wedding and your family expansion are your decisions to make with your fiancé. I think feeling sad for the baby you lost makes total sense to me in general b/c we all have those days and it will drive our decisions. I got married at 23 and I’m a big proponent of trying early (it’s taken us 4.5 years and no kids yet) and I wish we would have tried sooner. We did get married 3 months to the day from engagement (that sparked a few questions of course), but I was so excited to get married and found that no matter if you have 3 months or 3 yrs to plan a wedding you’ll have the people you want and the day will be perfect. My recommendation would be to talk through with your fiancé – what do you want to do for both the wedding and TTC and then make that decision together. Parents will always have their opinions (you know that clearly)… but if you stand together as a united front you’ll be good J You’ve got a lot of great things coming this year for you and I’m excited to see what happens for you. Sorry for the book…

peggels24 · January 2014

@classicstar28 Good luck with the interviews! Are you now going for an FHA loan or are you going for a different loan? The FHA loan is a PITA - the appraisers can really put you through the wringer. I would also keep an eye out for costs that you won't get back.

MrsG80inTN · January 2014

@classicstar28 - good luck on your interviews! Keep us posted!

classicstar28 · January 2014

@peggels24 We are looking at FHA and CHFA loans. It looks like the CHFA is less expensive overall because of all the weird crap with the FHA despite a higher interest rate. But, my understanding is that with CHFA we can't do anything to our student loans, i.e. put them in forbearance or lower the payments. Not entirely sure since the mortgage guy only said that they have to count against us when figuring out the debt to income ratio. I assume that means we can't touch them. I'm concerned because we qualify to lower our payments and it is something we would like to do since those payments are killer with me only working part time. This may be a non-issue once I get a full time job and then the CHFA is a clear better option. We shall see.

angelaclev · January 2014

@classicstar28 good luck with the interviews!

@Waliany2015- yay for finding the dress!

As for me AF came last week so one step closer to TTC again. For my loss date next month I had planned on staying home just me and my husband and doing nothing. I don't want to go somewhere and see something and start an awful cry in the store. Instead, I have to make a valentines dinner for my church. My husband and I are youth leaders, and the kids do the serving for the dinner. My pastor scheduled it before talking with me and now it is going to be on valentines day on our EDD.

jbasore1123 · January 2014

Hi ladies,
Sorry to post and run but I am sick and dizzy and plan to go to bed early. I'm sorry for not responding to everyone's post tonight.

I had my first monitoring appt on Saturday. It went well. The RN counted 14 follicles. She had a very difficult time seeing my left ovary (which caused some pain for me) and could barely see it when she did. There was a cluster of follicles that she couldn’t count. She suspected that there may be others as well. However, when I went back yesterday the RN counted 12 and there didn't appear to be any growth. WTF?! I don't know why I'm not responded as well as I did during IVF #1 (I had 17 follicles at my 2nd scan) since my doc increased my dosage this time. I have another scan tomorrow and retrieval should be Friday or Saturday.

mlt13 · January 2014

@mlt13 6/15/2014 ~ Welcome to the check-in, I’m so sorry for
your loss and that things are taking so long to return to normal. Does your
doctor think AF will return soon after hcg is 0?

Thanks for hosting the check in @jbasore1123. My doc didn't seem to worry that as of two weeks ago AF hadn't returned. She said 4-6 weeks after bleeding has stopped - though it has been. I am in the process of looking for a new doc bc I don't think we meshed well.

Part of me is wondering if the 4/5 day spotting I had two weeks ago could be considered a cycle, though a small one at that. I've recently started temping again in hopes to get a better picture at what is going on.

toomanycats1 · January 2014

@jbasore1123 - Hope you're feeling better! FX the scan today goes well, and you're still on track for retrieval :-)

@rmpar29 - Sorry about your long cycles. That makes things frustrating for sure. I O anywhere from day 26-52, so I can definitely relate. I'm hoping to give Femara a try too!

@Ashris13 - FX for you :-)

@peggels24 - Glad to hear your husband is more on board with TTC.

@GLB30 - Don't feel like a "bad bumpie". We all need to take a step back sometimes, and that's ok.

@MrsG80inTN - Sorry you had a rough weekend. ((Hugs))

@Wino411 - Sorry for the BFN. ((Hugs))

@racegurl87 - Be careful with those apps! They aren't as accurate as temping and OPK's because they work off of averages, so don't panic if you think you're "late" and keep getting BFN's. FX you had perfect timing :-)

@Waliany2015 - A little unsolicited advice? I would wait at least a couple more months. Your dress probably won't fit if you're a few months pregnant. It just won't. You might also feel like crap on your wedding day. I was diagnosed with Endo when I was in my early 20's, and was told by the doc's I would have a tough time getting pregnant. We got married when I was 28 and thinking it would take a long time to get pg, I stopped taking BCP's a month before my wedding day. Yep, I got pg right away. Even though I was only 5 weeks along, I almost didn't fit my dress because my boobs had gotten bigger :P (I wish it was that easy at 34... turns out doc was right after all!). My point is, if you've paid for your dress and honeymoon, you might just want to wait to avoid added expense/issues that could arise. Love the dress though... you look amazing! Oh, and totally understand the what you mean about feeling guilty about trying before the wedding. I was so scared to tell everyone I was pregnant before I got married... that I didn't. Not sure if they ever did do the math or not, but I certainly wasn't going to point it out to them!

@classicstar28 - Hope you get your pre-approval soon! Sorry it's taking so long. Sorry about AF arriving, but if you had a lot of spotting, it probably wasn't a good cycle anyway. Hope you find the perfect job soon!

@angelaclevenger - Sorry you had a commitment come up on your EDD. FWIW, my EDD wasn't nearly as hard as I thought it would be. I'm not saying it wasn't sad, but I was ok. Maybe working on a dinner for the church will be a welcome distraction for you. Can you and your husband go for a nice evening walk afterwards to talk and remember your LO?

@mlt13 - I think your 4-5 day spotting could have been ovulation spotting... or just mid-cycle spotting. My first cycle after m/c I always spot a lot. Then again, I tend to spot a little mid-cycle anyway, but after a m/c it's quite a bit more than usual. It is possible to O before your HCG returns to 0. The way I tell spotting from AF is whether I need protection or not. If it's enough that a simple panty liner has me covered for the day... it's usually just spotting.

toomanycats1 · January 2014

@HelloSweetie1 6/21/2013 ~ I’m so sorry for the BFN and that AF showed ((hugs)). How are you feeling about talking to an RE? Have you found any clinics that you are interested in?

(Big/long update below)

So I've made the decision and we are jumping into fertility treatments. I've investigated Fertility Clinics in the province, and I think we are going to try one that's a 7.5 hr drive away (that's the closest!). They work in conjunction with Genesis out of Vancouver, so if we end up moving past IUI and onto IVF, we just go there instead (it's a 9 hr drive from here). I've got a Skype consult booked for Mar 4th (eek!), and I'm seeing my OB next week to have everything sent over. I'm also going to talk to my OB about Femara, to see if that will give me an earlier or stronger O, and maybe help prevent future losses. Not too sure what my main issue is anymore, and that's the problem. I definitely need specialty care at this point.

DH is on board (although I'm not sure he realizes the expense that will be involved) so that's good at least. The nurse already contacted me via e-mail to answer my questions, and it looks like my cycles will be medicated so the irregularity won't be an issue. This will be great for 2 reasons.... DH won't be able to go out of town for work, and we'll have an actual idea of when my FW is! That will lower my stress level so much. The unfortunate thing is that I will have to travel for monitoring (bw can be done here), so I could end up spending a week away. I would much rather drive back and forth, so if anyone knows how often the monitoring is done, please share!

Overall, I'm feeling much better about this plan and I'm jumping right in. The downside? It means I'll have to go public about our struggles, and up until this point we've told NO ONE we're even TFAS. They only know about the first m/c, and everyone thinks that was an "oops" because we haven't got pregnant since

peggels24 · January 2014

@hellosweetie1 I'm excited for you that you are moving forward with a plan! I can't believe how far away you have to go - I hope you can find a way to make the distance work that you are comfortable with.

[Deleted User] · January 2014

jbasore1123 said:

***************************

QOTW: In honor of the Goldon Globes this past weekend, if you watched it, who (in your opinion) was the best dressed? Worst dressed?

**************************

June Bugs:

@noonandj04 6/22/2014 ~ We missed you the last 2 weeks. I’m glad you are starting to feel better. When are you getting back on that horse?

Hello! Thank you for asking after me. I have started TTC this month! New year, new hopes! My doctor is putting me on progesterone suppositories, since I've had two m/c's in the past six months. Hoping they help!

QOTW: Best dressed at the Globes goes to Naomi Watts! Worst dressed...Lena Dunham.

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