What am I doing wrong?

sugarellie · January 2014

Hi Ladies!!

So FI and I are about at our whits end with sleep deprivation. LO has never been a good sleeper, we did have like a two week stretch at one point where he slept for 4-5 hours straight at night, but then he started waking up again at night, now he is back to waking ever 1-2 hours. He will be 5 months old this weekend. I get the whole "4 month sleep regression" which may have contributed to him slipping back into not sleeping at night, but he slipped back into his old habits about 6 weeks ago, I feel like he should be sleeping through the night at this point ? I just don't think this is the regression, more that he just has really bad sleep habits since he has always been a poor sleeper.I wanted to hear what your doing and what your opinions are about methods to get him to sleep. We have tried everything, he use to sleep in a rock n play and swaddled. About 3 weeks ago we moved him to a bassinet and we do not swaddle him anymore because he was breaking out of it. When he wakes up he needs either some bottle or his paci to get himself to go back to sleep. The other night out of pure desperation we even tried to let him cry for a few min to see if he would calm down and go back to sleep, no such luck, after 8 min ( that's all I could handle) he was rip roaring upset . We do white noise, he has a humidifier, the room is warm enough etc etc.. he also is eating some baby food now, so he should be full enough. And the dr said that there is no "medical" reason he shouldn't be sleeping through the night at this point. What would you ladies do if you were me? Any ideas? I do not know how much longer I can take no sleep.. every night . Thank you if you read all of this !!

OliveMom3 · January 2014

I'm totally in the same position as you. We are on week 5 of this and I'm loosing my marbles.

We even bought the magic sleep suit which my son has renamed the magic poop suit.

Ugh! I'm not a cry it out kind of gal (total respect to those who are though) so we will just be waiting it out. This can't go on forever. Unless someone here posts a magical solution! FX.

sugarellie · January 2014

OliveMom3 said:

I'm totally in the same position as you. We are on week 5 of this and I'm loosing my marbles. We even bought the magic sleep suit which my son has renamed the magic poop suit. Ugh! I'm not a cry it out kind of gal (total respect to those who are though) so we will just be waiting it out. This can't go on forever. Unless someone here posts a magical solution! FX.

Im not pro cry it out either, it broke my heart just to let him cry for 8 min, but somethings got to give. For us, its not just been the past 6 weeks, its been since birth that he has woken multiple times at night, we had a two week reprieve, but basically since August 19th, 2013 I have not had more than 5 hours sleep, and our work and home life is really starting to suffer at this point. I would honestly be happy to get 5 hours sleep, hell even 4 hours would be great, a consistent 4-5 hours every night would be AWESOME

sugarellie · January 2014

twolittlewheels said:

DS1 was up every 3 hours until he was 10 months old. Sometimes it's not about right or wrong, just a personality that doesn't like to sleep. The things we did to help won't work until LO is older. I know 4 months of no sleep feels like forever but it's still pretty young to STTN.

Around 9 months we started limiting LO's naps, weaned from the pacifier so he learned better self-soothing habits and gave an ounce or so of water in a sippy instead of nursing at night to break his habit. Ultimately, we had to resort to CIO. He never cried for more than 10 minutes and it was rarely more than fussing. He just needed to fuss for a bit to wind down and even at almost 4, he still hates sleeping and cries for a few minutes.

DD, on the other hand, was the complete opposite. STTN at 3 months, never cried and now asks to go to bed when she's tired. I believe it's just the difference in their personalities.
ETA: Hang in there! I know it's frustrating to be so tired with no end in sight but it will get better eventually.

Thank you for the reply! I do think LO is just a personality that doesn't like to sleep.. but you are right, no sleep every night is just really wearing. I think LO is still too young to CIO, FI on the other hand ( who doesn't handle extreme sleep deprivation as well) is ready to implement it. But like you said when you did it with your DS he just fussed for 10 min, to me that means he was ready, when we let LO cry the other night , he had full on tears , it wasn't just fussing, which to me means he is not ready for CIO or to STTN.. I don't even like the idea of CIO but we need to be able to function and take care of DS #1 too.. so somethings gotta give.

Bamgal25 · January 2014

Do you have someone who could help you for a night or two and let you catch up on some sleep? Just one night of good sleep might really help.
Also, does LO nap well? You could trying sleeping when he naps.
I still swaddle DD and I think it helps her stay asleep. Could you buy bigger swaddles or that magic sleep suit everyone talks about? Will he sleep in bed with you? If so, I would let him bedshare for a while if it will get you some sleep.
Also when DD is really upset I use the white noise baby app to help calm her down. There are different sounds and maybe one would work for you.
Good luck! Sleep deprivation really sucks.

RagsdaleA · January 2014

@sugarellie Have you tried Babywise or Moms on Call?

noelani42 · January 2014

I'm in the same boat- I don't think we're doing anything wrong...for some babies, it's just part of the package

sugarellie · January 2014

Bamgal25 said:

Do you have someone who could help you for a night or two and let you catch up on some sleep? Just one night of good sleep might really help. Also, does LO nap well? You could trying sleeping when he naps. I still swaddle DD and I think it helps her stay asleep. Could you buy bigger swaddles or that magic sleep suit everyone talks about? Will he sleep in bed with you? If so, I would let him bedshare for a while if it will get you some sleep. Also when DD is really upset I use the white noise baby app to help calm her down. There are different sounds and maybe one would work for you. Good luck! Sleep deprivation really sucks.

Unfortunately both FI and I work full time, so no napping for us, and LO is in daycare. I do think he doesn't get sufficient naps at daycare because there are always babies crying , talking etc.. and he is a really light sleeper. Maybe I will get a sleep suit to see if that helps, I'll try anything at this point! We do have the white noise app and use it every night, it def helps him not stir *as* easily..

sugarellie · January 2014

RagsdaleA said:

@sugarellie Have you tried Babywise or Moms on Call?

I haven't, are those sleep method books?

Paturkey · January 2014

I just wanted to say you're not alone. A handful of times my LO has slept 4-5 hours, but mostly I'm up every few hours all night long for the past four months. I'm frankly amazed I can function. Hang in there and good luck!

RagsdaleA · January 2014

@sugarellie I guess they're classified as that but that have all sorts of great information/tips in them for all aspects of baby life. I've found MOC most helpful.

sugarellie · January 2014

RagsdaleA said:

@sugarellie I guess they're classified as that but that have all sorts of great information/tips in them for all aspects of baby life. I've found MOC most helpful.

Thank you for the suggestion, I will have to pick that up .. that is , if I can read without falling asleep

sunshine2929 · January 2014

I totally understand. My LO started waking up multiple times a night when he was about 10 weeks old after having only woke up twice a night for about 6 weeks. Hes still waking every 2 hours at night. Last night we had only 2 w akeups so im hoping this sticks but im not holding my breath. Hang in there! This cant last forever!

leahaustin · January 2014

From what I understand not all babies are sleeping through the night at this point. I know it sucks but I don't think it is anything you are doing... You may just have to wait this out.

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