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moving forward

hajl12hajl12 member
in Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss
I need to know how to be more positive and not be mad at others for getting pregnant before me....I miscarried back in august 3 days after finding out we were pregnant. We were assured up and down we hadn't till we found out at my 8 week appt I had for sure had a miscarriage. We've been trying for 3 months to no avail and btw 3 people in my life have gotten pregnant since august...
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Re: moving forward

  • YaMrWhiteYaMrWhite member
    I found out the day of my D&C that a friend was pregnant. It stung. A lot. But it's not her fault. She didn't do it on purpose. I just keep telling myself that. And that my time will come. I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. T&Ps.
    Stephanie Ella ~ 6/15/2012
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  • smcniffsmcniff member
    I find myself looking at pregnant women and trying not to assume that everything in their life is perfect. Maybe the friend who just announced her pregnancy has been TTC for years, or maybe she struggled with multiple losses before this pregnancy. Because we don't tend to speak openly about loss it is hard to know what other women have been through to get where they are. If the woman has had an easy time, I try to be happy for her that she hasn't had to feel the pain that we have. Good luck to you as you TTCAL.


    BFP #1 11/02/13, EDD 07/04/14, BO diagnosed 12/12/13 at 9w5d
    BFP #2 6/12/14, DD born 2/21/15

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  • SweetiepopsSweetiepops member
    I had a m/c at 9 weeks in December. There are FOUR pregnant women at my work, and I made the cupcakes for one of their baby showers yesterday. It's so painful. Every day at least one of them is talking about their pregnancy, and I really miss being pregnant. We will hopefully start trying again this cycle (got my period back on Wed). But it's so hard to be around other happy pregnant people. I completely understand.
    TTC Since August, 2013
    BFP#1 11/2/2013 EDD 7/14/2014 MMC discovered at 8w3d (baby stopped growing at 6w2d)
    BFP#2 2/4/2014 EDD 10/15/2014 please stick little one!

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  • aezimmermanaezimmerman member
    I am sorry for your loss. I must admit that immediately following my m/c I was bitter about other people being pregnant or having a newborn. With time I was able to be happy for those people. It is not rational. Logic tells us that others' happiness does not diminish our own happiness. It is our heart that hurts and does not want to see others having the one thing we so desire. Give it time. Your heart will heal.
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  • flgrl521flgrl521 member
    I'm so sorry for your loss. My second miscarriage happened in April, then my father-in-law who's almost 60 and his younger wife announced they were pregnant. I have to admit it stung and upset me. Then my sister announced her pregnancy in October and it was unbearable. It's her third child, she always has perfect pregnancies. At the time I didn't realize I was pregnant again too. Then I m/c at the end of December and now get to watch their pregnancies continue. It's hard. I feel terrible that I can't be happier for them. I feel like I've changed and really don't care to be around people, especially happy pregnant people. It just feels like nobody understands what I'm going through. But I hope with each loss we come closer to figuring this out and will someday get to take home our baby too. I'm sad but haven't given up hope. It does get easier with time. I've actually unfollowed a lot of people on Facebook because it was too hard to see bump and baby pictures. This has helped a lot actually. Make sure you protect yourself first and allow time to heal. Hugs.
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