Officially had it with this morning...

designer303 · January 2014

Sorry Ladies, I literally feel like I have no one else to talk to this about. I have been doing so much better and this morning was really just the kick in the pants I didn't need. DH couldn't get a cab to the train station this morning and had to make a train to DC so I woke G up and drove him to the train, came home got us both out the door for school and work. Then went to the RE for hopefully the last round of post miscarriage monitoring. From there I went to pharmacy which made me pay in full for the progesterone supplements I was on to try and save the pregnancy, becuase my lovely insurance company said they would finally process the claim when I picked it up. That trip in the freezing cold turned out to be totally pointless as they said they can't do anything after seven days so get to the office spend another hour on the phone with Aetna and make some small progress on that front and I am trying to move all my stupid feelings to somewhere far away when my assistant walks in to ask something and the feeling just washed over me like crazy and I blurted out: Are you pregnant? no answer, then she very quietly and shly says yes, her due date is two days before mine was and now I just want to to sit and cry. She knows about my loss, and I could tell she felt badly, but really now I have to watch her every day being where I should have been and please dont get me wrong I am happy for her, but this is just going to make moving on so much harder and now likely the whole time I should have been on maternity leave I will have to work a million times harder, because she is out on leave. Anywho thanks for listening... this sucks

Jeffreysmom24 · January 2014

Oh sorry, that is so hard!! It sucks that you will have to see her everyday, it will be a painful reminder to you I know. I love posting on my BMB but there is a sweet girl who has been pregnant and keeps saying how she can't wait to not be pregnant and how it wasn't even planned etc - it is so hard to deal with people like that even though I am happy for her.

Sending you lots of big hugs!! Keep your head up!

Jen071407 · January 2014

Big ((hugs))! I also have an IRL acquaintance who is due 3 days before when I was due. I am avoiding her like the plague, so I'm so sorry you have to work with your "plague."

Spookster · January 2014

I am sorry you are having such a rough day, I don't think you can ever really prepare for those moments

((Hugs))

designer303 · January 2014

Thanks very much for all the hugs and support- greatly appreciated and have helped do what I didnt think I could!!

I decided avoiding this one wasn't going to work at all since I will be seeing her everyday, so I asked her to come into my office and talk . I Really said congratulations to her and I didn't cry while doing it as I did the first time and then we talked for a little while, I told her I know that is not easy for either of us, as I was once in a somewhat similar situation when I finally got KU with G, the other girl I work with had a loss at 26 weeks the Feb before I concieved in April and I was terrified to tell her I was pregnant because I didnt want to cause her anymore pain, but these things happen and she was amazing about it, so I decided to draw strength from her and I actually think I feel better. I am determined to get the control back, so heres hoping that I keep finding places and people to draw strength from and thank you again for all your kinds words they mean so much.

Amerbutt81 · January 2014

It was good of you to sit her down and really get it out-- I am sure it was a relief for both of you.

Sending you lots of strong vibes and internet hugs.

Momarazzi007 · January 2014

Sorry such a rough morning. You are just amazing for handling it with such grace! I am sure she appreciated it and don't ever lose that amazing quality! Hugs!