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Pregnant after 35
So I am really the only OLD mom here
I am OLD. I mean OLD. I'm pushing 45. Ooooold.
But anyway, I have been wondering with any older moms--like post 40 moms are you being treated as if you have a super duper high risk pregnancy.
I've passed all my third trimester tests. Everything is good.
Some bad stuff could still happen I realize!!! I am holding my breath.
I realize I am in a very high risk category.
But they will give me 'surprise' tests. Like I had a surprise full anatomy scan--another one even though I have the best numbers of everything in the world and am measuring correctly and heartbeat is great and 100% everything normal as can be.
Why does this happen?
I don't fully understand my medical treatment.
I am VERY HAPPY my baby is normal so far but I am spending all day at the OB and I missed picking up my kid from school. They gave me no warning or reason ahead of time except 'you aren't getting any younger.'
I suppose they are just playing it safe but it felt very impromptu and odd. They do not explain anything, ever. The assumption seems to be that any day now I am getting preeclampsia so I better be ready for that. That is literally the only thing they ever mention to me: How to watch for signs of preeclampsia.
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Re: So I am really the only OLD mom here
Hmmm...I'm sorry your OB team is not being more upfront with you, especially so they don't scare you.
Maybe my story would put you at ease with your age a bit...or at least offer a different OB perspective:
Out of the location convenience, I unknowingly referred myself to a high risk OB clinic when I found out I was pregnant. They reluctantly accepted me based on my age and the IVF. I see OBs who normally only treat women with really high risk pregnancies. The clinic team never seems phased by anything with my pregnancy. They order the necessary tests and refer to my pregnancy symptoms and to the whole false-positive DNA saga (& subsequent scans and amnio) as "little bumps in the road." My OB even commented that she didn't normally see patients like me, but that it is nice to have a patient who isn't really high risk.
I hope your OB lets you relax a bit more. Good luck.
**DD1 - 7/9/98**
**DS - 11/9/00**
**DD2 - 4/30/13**
Unless you have pre-existing medical conditions, are obese, or have acquired gestational diabetes I cannot understand why they would perform so many tests, especially without telling you what they are for. Although I am 39 (will have just turned 40 when I deliver) my doctor told me that all those extra tests are unnecessary- for anyone not considered high risk.
I'm not sure exactly where you live but I wouldn't be surprised if the doctor is sapping the medical system unnecessarily. If your numbers are normal then in my opinion, this unnecessary screening is just causing anxiety which can result in high blood pressure and other issues.
What I was also told is that woman over 35 are considered high risk because many of them have developed health issues over the years. However if you are a healthy, active, non-smoking, non-substance abusing woman, then you can be just as healthy as a woman in her 20s.
I'm 43, and they've definitely been aggressive in terms of scheduling me for things like ultrasounds and genetic screening tests. That makes sense to me, because my eggs are older, and those things come along for the ride.
What worries me, though, is that one of my OB's partners was starting to talk about really aggressive monitoring - like having me wear a fetal monitor during the last month of pregnancy - and so far there's been no reason to think that I am going to have difficulty, other than my age.
I know that I am at greater risk for things like diabetes, high blood pressure, and preeclampsia, but I am quite concerned that I'll still be labeled "high risk" at the time of delivery even if everything continues to go smoothly (and so far, this pregnancy has been very unexciting - for which I am grateful).
I'm going to talk with my primary OB about her partner's attitude next appointment, and see if she shares it, but, yeah. I "know those feels," as they say.
Iris born Halloween 2013! 6 lbs, 1 oz, 18 inches long
Haha. I'm 37 and the same way. I think they mention my ADVANCED MATERNAL AGE at every visit.
Updated September 2012.
What worries me, though, is that one of my OB's partners was starting to talk about really aggressive monitoring - like having me wear a fetal monitor during the last month of pregnancy
Say what??? How would that work? Like--would you not be able to walk around? Are you strapped to a machine. Goodness gracious!!! I thought my situation was bad.
Boy--thank you ladies. Maybe I'll stop complaining.
Yeah, you are at higher risk for GD but if you don't HAVE GD then you don't have GD. So the risk is kind of irrelevant, yes?
I did have one higher BP read when I came running in to the office but then I said 'take it again' and it was low/normal. But they did not bother to record the re-take. SIGH.
I'm switching OBs anyway. I'm kind of fed up with my OB. Their treatment makes me extremely anxious and that's the last thing I need.
___________
As far as genetic testing goes, I resented that they did it without asking and it involved an ultrasound. They should ask if you want the test because you plan to terminate. Otherwise, maybe you don't want it. They should not push that test on people.
____________
Anyway, you all made me feel better!!! I guess the big issue is-I know I'm old for a pregnant mother, I don't mind any health care that takes risk into account and I'm not insulted about my oldness. BUT if you don't mind--can you not constantly freak me out at each prenatal visit?
I know! She made it sound like it would be something I could just wear around the house, but I don't think that's how those things work, and I wouldn't want that even if it did. It wouldn't be good for my mental health to have something tracking every damn thing all the time; it's why I'm not bothering to get a Doppler - I'd be checking it all the time and freaking myself out if anything seemed even the littlest bit "off." It's better for me to just assume everything's going well, until it isn't.
Plus that sort of thing just screams out a likelihood of them wanting to induce me or schedule a c-section, two things I'm really, really hoping to avoid.
Edited to add: saw my main OB today, and she was totally sympathetic to my concerns. She explained that the monitoring would be a go in once a week sort of deal, but she also said that I seemed like a good candidate for a nurse-midwife, and gave me the card of the group affiliated with her hospital. So, I guess I'll be giving them a call, and see what they think! Nice!
Iris born Halloween 2013! 6 lbs, 1 oz, 18 inches long
You have the right to question everything & refuse what ever you want. Many doctors use intimidation to rationalize old practices.
Ask questions first.
Demand explinations & if your insurance allows it.. change doctors..its ok to do so.
Get educated. You have rights. You can deny certain test if you find out its not necessary. There are some great youtube videos out there by Ina May.
she is a midwife but is pro-safe birth - so she doesn't swing either way. More interested in mothers getting the birth they want. She educates mom's & medical professionals on everything about birthing. I really like her videos. they are thourough & very informative. She has also written several books.
there is a lot of information out there. you have to find out what works best for you. the main thing is if you are healthy & the baby is healthy there is no need to assume a condition. there should be indicators & if age is your only indicator than your next question should be is it necessary?.
I am 47 and will be close to 48 when I deliver. I have had all the necessary tests for us older women. I have a high risk doctor solely because of my age. I've had a pretty easy and normal pregnancy for the most part. I did get Gestational Diabetes at week 25 and was then put on med's at week 27. I had my 5th ultrasound last week to check the baby's growth. When I went to my ultrasound my blood pressure was a little elevated, but they took it again after I was finished with the test and it was normal. I had a bought with a stomach thing that morning, which dehydrated me and they contributed my higher blood pressure to that, but he wants my doctor to now perform a stress test every week until delivery. I will be discussing this with my doctor as I do think this might be a little much. I have been treated like any other normal pregnancy for the most part, but my doctor did say that they will monitor me more closely once I reach the 3rd trimester. I would ask as many questions as possible. I do think that some facilities go beyond what is necessary, merely for $.
Best of luck to you.
So now with my OB at the first appointment I could alay his concerns that normally go with Mature aged pregnancy.
I feel I am treated the same as everyone else - yes they are watching carefully and will make visits more frequent after 25 weeks but I kind of expect that given the precious cargo I have on board.
I'm now at 18 weeks with anatomy scan next week and next OB appointment the week after.
I always try and get to my appointment early as I have to walk up a hill and stairs so it gives me time to recover b4 my BP is taken so far all normal.